Before you pop the question or say “I do” there are a few boxes that need to be checked for couples in the military.

There’s lots to tackle before you get to the altar (or courthouse, if we’re being honest). It’s easy to get overwhelmed, but it’s all 100% possible and totally doable.

Resources to Plan Your Military Wedding with Ease

Congrats! You’re and your partner are about to enter an exciting and hectic time in your relationship: wedding planning. Oh, and you’ll get to do it on the US military’s schedule. Which makes it super fun and wonderful.

Before You Pop the Question

There are no rules about who military troops may marry. Marry the person you love. Same sex marriage is legal and recognized across the country.

However, there are some small caveats at play.

First, students at service academies must graduate and get commissioned or leave the academy before marriage. So wait until after one of those two life events, and you’re golden.

Also, there are rules about fraternization, meaning crossing rank barriers. For example, an officer and an enlisted member cannot get married. However, if two people of equal enlisted rank do so and one partner later gets commissioned, they are grandfathered in and the relationship is totally fine.

Just make sure you’re not in either of those two categories before you ask your partner to get hitched.

Planning Your Big Day

You might picture a sword arch or cutting the cake with a saber. Maybe you’d like you or your spouse-to-be to wear dress uniforms. Perhaps you think it’s a rule to follow these traditions.

Great news: your wedding is still 100% yours. No need to risk cake on dress blues or eat cake off a sword. You do you.

In the process of planning your wedding day, there are tons of resources you can access that can make the process easier and cheaper:

• Base Chaplains: military chaplains of all denominations can provide pre-marital and marriage counseling at no cost to you. You can also often rent out the base chapel for free – and book a minister into the deal. There is a suggested donation, but even that will be less expensive than renting a civilian church.
• MFLC: contact your local Military Family Life Counselor for individual or joint marriage counseling. This is a judgement-free zone to explore your relationship and the impact of military service with a trained counselor.
• Use Uniforms: its fancy clothes you or your partner already own, so use it! Ask military friends in your wedding party or on the invitation to feel free to wear their best military uniforms, too. Just be sure everyone in the wedding party is wearing the same uniform in terms of formality, even across branches of service.

You might also want to consider getting wedding insurance. The military’s missions don’t stop for your big day. Which means that short-notice deployments, TDY trips and other unexpected events can derail your careful planning. Having insurance can help you to recoup some of those losses.

Another way to get around the military’s schedule is to get married on short notice. Contact the chaplain, local churches and justices of the peace to learn about last minute cancellations or openings. You can do the same with reception venues in your desired location, too. Often you can score a good deal by picking up someone else’s cancellation.

If you’re inviting other military members to your wedding, you might want to consider how to address the invitations and arrange seating. You can skip all of this if the military aspect isn’t factoring into your big day. For more formal or military-focused events, consider addressing invitations with military rank (Staff Sergeant and Mr. Smith) and seat guests by rank. Contact your base or unit protocol officer for assistance.

After You’re Hitched

Congrats! You did it! Now you’ve got to handle all the paperwork of getting married.

If you are changing a last name, you’ll need to:

• Update your SSN
• Get a new driver’s license
• Apply for a new passport
• Update bank, insurance and other name-associated accounts
• Double check other important life documents and rules

For every new military spouse (and sponsor!), you’ll need to:

• Enroll in DEERS
• Get an official dependent ID card
• Update SGLI to include the new spouse as the recipient
• Update chain of command with the spouse’s new next of kin and contact information
• Update the military member’s paperwork and file to reflect marital status, next of kin and contact information
• Obtain blanket and special power of attorney documents to provide access to accounts and services when the military member is away
• Memorize the military member’s SSN – it’s used for literally everything

All of these name changes and updates can take time, so don’t book your honeymoon in your new married last name. Your booking does need to match your passport or other identifying documents.

Also, make sure you’ve double checked the military member’s leave status and deployment schedule before you book any big trips. Many military couples delay their honeymoon to accommodate the mission.

What questions do you have about getting married as a military member or becoming a military spouse? We’d love to point you in the right direction!

By Marguerite Cleveland

     The Military One Source website is a wealth of information for military spouses. The website is broken down into a variety of categories and there really is something for everyone. It is a helpful resource to help you juggle this crazy lifestyle we live. Here are a few things I found on the site:

• MySECO – The Spouse Education and Career Opportunities has employment partnerships and job listings for over 300,000 jobs open to military spouses. There is a career exploration category which helps you refine what you are looking for. There are also educational resources. Employment readiness can help you get your resume in order and evaluate your skills and what you may want to learn. Learn what it takes to start your own business.
• Military Life Cycle – This section provides information on where you are at in the military life cycle. New there is a section for you. Getting ready for deployments, check. There is a section for Veterans and even a place friends and family can sign up to receive emails about your new life.
• Health & Wellness – There are over 100 items posted in this section. Categories include Healthcare, Healthy Living, Mental Health, Wounded Warriors and Caregivers. You can sign up for a Military One Source Health and Wellness Coach who will help you reach goals to lose weight, eat more nutritiously, get physically fit, help you manage stress and much more. The best part it is free.
• Recreation, Travel and Shopping – What a wealth of information. Recreation has categories for those trying to get in shape, if you’re single or information on the libraries for those that love to read. Travel shows you where to access great deals for travel and even lets you search by installation for information on your area.
• Family & Relationships – This section has over 200 posts and deals with all types of relationships from spouse to children. It has information for parents with special needs children. There is lots of guidance from those who have been there done that to help you in your journey.
• Confidential Help – Did you know you can call Military One Source for help?  800.342.9647, check the website for OCONUS options. This is a good category to look at if you don’t know where to turn. Check here if you want to adopt a baby. Does my husband have PTSD? Marital problems etc. Help is available 24/7.

     Military One Source is just one of the many resources available to help you navigate military life. Are you taking advantage of all your benefits?

Marguerite Cleveland is a freelance writer who specializes in human interest and travel stories. She is a military brat, a veteran and now a military spouse.  Her military experience is vast as the daughter of a Navy man who served as an enlisted sailor and then Naval Officer. She served as an enlisted soldier in the reserves and on active duty, then as an Army Officer. She currently serves as a military spouse. She lives in the Pacific Northwest with her husband and two sons. Visit her website www.PeggyWhereShouldIGo.com

By Marguerite Cleveland

     When it comes to summer fun and kids, just add water. It is amazing how something so simple can keep the little ones occupied. Here are a few fun things to do which don’t cost a lot of money.

• Watering the Yard – This is a twofer. Kids love running through sprinklers so next time you are watering your lawn plan for some water fun as well. It is a win-win, the children are occupied and your lawn gets some TLC.
• Cooking – Depending on your tolerance for a mess use just water or water with dirt or sand. Set up a bench in your yard to serve as the kitchen. Fill a small toddler swimming pool with water which can be purchased for under $20. Get a variety of utensils and containers and let the kids just go at it making imaginary treats. Yes is can be messy but so fun for the kids.
• Splash Parks – Most military installations now have splash parks which are free to use during the summer months. Many newer, upscale shopping centers offer splash parks as well. I loved using these when I had toddlers as they would run and run and just wear themselves out making for a nice relaxing naptime later where Mom could take a breather.
• County and State Parks – Many local parks have lakes with beaches which are a fun place to enjoy a day at the “beach” with smaller children. Usually there is a nice shallow area for wading. Entry fees range from free to a few dollars. State Parks also offer annual passes that give you admission for a year to all their parks and it is well worth it.
• Water Parks – Waterparks are usually a high ticket summer activity but did you know there are some less expensive alternatives. Many counties have their own smaller waterparks. They may not have all the bells and whistles but most usually have a good lazy river, a couple of waterslides and a themed child play area with admissions under $20. If you plan on going frequently a season’s pass may be worth the Splurge. The park we used to go to charges $60 for a season’s pass which is well worth it if you plan to visit a few times. A local county park where I am currently living has a wave pool and another one has a pool, waterslide and lazy river.

     When planning a day in the water, make sure to liberally apply sunscreen to the little ones. You can save money by visiting your local commissary for a picnic lunch. The delis can make sandwiches to order or you can pick up grab and go items. When going to a water park plan to take a break and head out to your car for lunch. It will save you bunches.

Marguerite Cleveland is a freelance writer who specializes in human interest and travel stories. She is a military brat, a veteran and now a military spouse.  Her military experience is vast as the daughter of a Navy man who served as an enlisted sailor and then Naval Officer. She served as an enlisted soldier in the reserves and on active duty, then as an Army Officer. She currently serves as a military spouse. She lives in the Pacific Northwest with her husband and two sons. Visit her website www.PeggyWhereShouldIGo.com

By Marguerite Cleveland

     According to a Department of Veterans Affairs, the average number of veterans who died by suicide is 20 per day. It is an appalling number and one that just hits too close to home. My first experience occurred when a young soldier who lived in our neighborhood committed suicide. I didn’t know him, but it broke my heart that this young man lived down the street from me was suffering so much.

     Sometimes everything is done correctly by those that support a soldier or veteran and they still commit suicide. One situation that still haunts me is of a more senior NCO who was in treatment for PTSD and suicidal thoughts. The unit deployed again and he remained behind as part of the rear detachment so he could continue treatment. He ended up committing suicide in the safe space at the mental health facility on post. Needless to say everyone who knew him from his doctors, members of the rear detachment and his family were devastated. At the time, to help me deal with the situation and to help others in the unit, I spoke to a person who had lost his wife to suicide. He told me that it is not about us. Sometimes someone is in so much pain they just want it to stop.

     So what can we do about this statistic? Is there anything the average person can do to help? As a matter of fact there is. Consider taking the free online course S.A.V.E.  offered by the PsychArmor Institute. The simple steps of S.A.V.E. which stands for Signs, Ask, Validate, Encourage and Expedite, offer simple steps anyone can take when talking with Veterans at risk for suicide. The course was developed by the PsychArmor Institute in collaboration with the Department of Veterans Affairs. The course is presented by Dr. Megan McCarthy, Deputy Director, Suicide Prevention. According to McCarthy, “You will develop a general understanding of the problem of suicide in the United States; understand how to identify a Veteran who may be at risk for suicide; and, finally, know what to do if you identify a Veteran at risk. Each of us has the opportunity to be that one person who makes a difference–the person who asks the question that can save a Veteran’s life, or the life of anyone struggling with the thoughts of suicide. Using the simple steps of S.A.V.E., we can all make a difference and #BeThere.”

     Sometimes with a problem so big it is hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Even just small steps like donating to an organization that helps prevent Veteran Suicide or just listening to someone who needs to talk can make a difference.

Marguerite Cleveland is a freelance writer who specializes in human interest and travel stories. She is a military brat, a veteran and now a military spouse.  Her military experience is vast as the daughter of a Navy man who served as an enlisted sailor and then Naval Officer. She served as an enlisted soldier in the reserves and on active duty, then as an Army Officer. She currently serves as a military spouse. She lives in the Pacific Northwest with her husband and two sons. Visit her website www.PeggyWhereShouldIGo.com

Look, I love summer as much as the next person. But I’m also super busy all year round with work, life and my kids. It’s just that, well, in summer the lines between life, work and kids blurs a whole lot more. Since we’re adding in a PCS this summer, life’s about to get insanely logistically crazy.

Little Ways to Save Your Sanity This Summer

What I’m trying to say is that I’m searching for any little (or big) ways to save my sanity this summer. Since I’m just a bit into research, I’ve deep dived into this and I’m sharing everything I’ve learned with you!

Invest in Child Care

If you don’t have kids, please skip this section or file it away for a time when you do need it.

Got kids? This is for you!

As a busy mom of two under 5 who also works from home, I know the struggle of trying to do it all while also making memories. The reality is that it’s almost impossible to do both perfectly all the time. I also don’t want to stop the fun times for my kids because I’ve got deadlines and projects.

Instead, I’m investing in child care! Here are some options you can try that won’t break the bank:

• Child Care Swaps: find a group of parents that you like and trust, then swap play date duties! Keep the kids at your house for a few hours while the other parents get things done. Then, another parent can take over the next time. It’s free, other than sharing some snacks!
• Parents’ Helper: help a young teen or tween gain babysitting skills this summer! Your kids will love having a fun, older kids to play with. You’ll love getting some work done around the house for less than a normal babysitting rate.
• Busy Bins: setting up an independent play center is ideal for older toddlers and preschoolers! It’s not a babysitter, but having activities that require minimal adult assistance is crucial when you need to take a minute for yourself.

Say Yes to Deliveries

If I can get everything I need without having to drag my children along to a store, then I want in on that service. Right now, we’re living in the golden age of delivery services for literally everything.

This summer, I’ll be getting these types of items delivered:

• Groceries: from in-house options like Peapod to pick-your-store choices like Instacart, it’s almost too easy to not shop in-person anymore. If delivery isn’t your jam, I’m also loving the virtual cart feature many grocery stores are adding. Shop the store from anywhere, pay and schedule pickup when it suits your schedule!
• Meal Kits: if you’re tired of collecting random full size ingredients for a one-off recipe, meal kits are for you! Perfectly portioned ingredients, with just enough for the recipe you’re making. There are options for literally every single diet and taste: vegan, vegetarian, gluten free, Keto, Paleo and even kids!
• Subscription Boxes: getting a regular stock of useful items is way cool. I’m the first to admit that I’m stuck in my ways, so having a subscription box that injects new options into my routines is perfect. From books to fitness gear, snacks to dog toys, there’s a box to fit your interest.
• Household Essentials: skip the mad dash to the store the next time you run out of toilet paper by never running out again! Set up auto-delivery of your household essentials with Amazon Prime or a similar service. We currently use it for diapers, wipes and household cleaners.

Keep Things Tidy

Whether you’re looking to tidy up your yard or your house, outsourcing these tasks can 100% save your sanity over the summer. I know we’ll certainly be investing during this crazy PCS.

• Cleaning Services: from a one-time deep clean to regular service, investing in housecleaning is crucial to keeping things running. Get your new house shipshape after you unpack, deep clean the beach sand out of the nooks and crannies or make sure the bathrooms are always clean. Trust me, it’s worth it!
• Professional Organizer: it’s always a struggle to fit everything we own into each new house. Every floor plan is very different, which makes it hard to build just one system. Instead of fighting it, I’m embracing professional organization services like Modified by Melissa – offered by a military spouse!
• Lawn Care Services: no one likes weeds in the flowers or an unkept lawn. You can invest in a professional, all-inclusive regular service or hire the teen down the street. Either way, weeds you aren’t pulling is worth every penny.

Easy Summer Fun

Ultimately, summer is a time for fun. And there are tons of easy ways, especially for military families, to really enjoy every second of summer vacation!

• Blue Star Museums: coast-to-coast, museums are opening their doors to military families – for free! From children’s museums to botanical gardens, you can find a great place to visit for the day.
• On-Base Pool: when the summer gets hot, it’s time to hop into the pool on-base. Many pools offer toddler splash pad or tiny tot pools as well as places to swim laps or dive.
• Digital Library: grab the latest releases for kids and adults, for free, when you use your branch’s digital library service! Sign up is super simple. Just ask at your local base library.
• Theme Parks Nationwide: many theme parks, like Disney and Sea World, offer discounts or complimentary tickets to military families!

I know that this summer is going to so much simple and way less crazy!

What are your tips and tricks to save your sanity over the summer?

By Marguerite Cleveland

     Recently my son who was beginning the college application process asked me, “Mom where am I from? I was born in Georgia, you and Dad are residents of Florida where I never lived and my driver’s license is from Washington State. I have to admit I was stumped.

     Military children are carted from state to state and often around the world and have no choice in the matter. I remember going to three different schools in 4^th grade which was a tough year and my two boys will have each attended 6 schools by the time they graduate with my oldest going to six schools in six years. With the challenges military kids face they deserve a break.

     I propose the Military Children’s Residency Act. This law would allow military kids upon turning 18 to choose their state of residence. This would allow them to establish residency for college without having a waiting period. Isn’t that the least we can do for these resilient kids? Why should they have to pay thousands more in tuition because a parent serves in the military?

     We aren’t talking a lot of kids either. There are approximately 2,000,000 military children in school systems across the country. If you divide that out by grade equally that is a little over 150,000 graduating seniors. Around 70% of go on to college which is around 108,000. If you split it equally over the 50 states it is around 2200. Granted that number is probably much lower for some states and higher for others but still pretty low in the scheme of things. States could easily absorb in state tuition rates for these kids.

     I have seen a trend recently where the challenges our kids face are starting to be recognized. I live in Washington State and they just recently passed a law that allows military parents to register for school prior to having moving into their new homes. This past summer we were purchasing a home in a different school district and I wanted to register my son for summer school. The cutoff was before we closed on the house and even with a sales contract I was not allowed to register until we actually resided in the house. Very frustrating but this new law fixes that issue.

What laws do you think state and federal legislatures should pass for military families?

Marguerite Cleveland is a freelance writer who specializes in human interest and travel stories. She is a military brat, a veteran and now a military spouse.  Her military experience is vast as the daughter of a Navy man who served as an enlisted sailor and then Naval Officer. She served as an enlisted soldier in the reserves and on active duty, then as an Army Officer. She currently serves as a military spouse. She lives in the Pacific Northwest with her husband and two sons. Visit her website www.PeggyWhereShouldIGo.com

By Marguerite Cleveland

    Life as a Military Spouse can be extremely stressful and with deployments you are often carrying the load on your own. Often times you find yourself at the bottom of the list of things to do. For me the hardest time was when I had young children who weren’t speaking yet. It was isolating and exhausting. It is important to take care of yourself because you are the glue that holds everything together.

 Here are a few tips I found that helped me out over the years.

• Find some childcare and take some time for yourself each week. That maybe just taking a shower or going to coffee with a friend. If you are on a tight budget, arrange with a friend and each take a morning where you babysit the others children. It’s a win if the kids are close in age as they will play together all morning. During deployments many installations offer a certain number of free hours of child care. Also check out Mom’s Morning Out at local churches or the YMCA. These can be free or low cost. Some are a co-op where you volunteer and get hours in return.
• Take time to savor a special treat when the kids are napping or go to sleep for the night. Maybe a nice glass of wine or a perfect chocolate bonbon.
• Set a goal. My sister talked me into doing a triathlon and I then talked a few of my friends into it. I downloaded a training plan and made a point to allow time for it. It was such a great stress reliever and the bonus of getting into shape.
• If you have small children, plan play dates. An hour or two at a playground with other Moms can be a nice break in routine. It also tires the little ones out so you will have bonus nap time giving you an additional break.
• Quit saving stuff for a special occasion and use it now. Enjoy a luxurious bath with products you got at Christmas. Get out one of the good plates and serve your meal on it. Using your special things will make you feel special.
• Watch a sad movie. I don’t know what it is but I feel so much better after a good cry. I can remember watching the movie “The Notebook” when my husband was deployed and having a complete total breakdown just sobbing my eyes out. I was exhausted but all that built up tension and stress was just gone

• If your budget allows, a massage, facial, or get your hair done. If you live in more of a resort town some of the spas have nice upscale facilities with saunas, hot tubs and pools. Getting a treatment done will allow you use of the facilities.
• Aromatherapy. I personally do not use essential oils but many Military Spouses I know swear by their use. These essential oils, lavender, sandalwood, bergamot, rose, chamomile, are used to relieve stress, calm nerves, relaxation, reducing anxiety and improving mood. You either rub on your skin or smell the oil to achieve the effects.

     It is important to take the time to care of yourself. So many people really count on us and taking a few minutes each day for yourself helps to keep you going. What is your favorite way to relieve stress?

Marguerite Cleveland is a freelance writer who specializes in human interest and travel stories. She is a military brat, a veteran and now a military spouse.  Her military experience is vast as the daughter of a Navy man who served as an enlisted sailor and then Naval Officer. She served as an enlisted soldier in the reserves and on active duty, then as an Army Officer. She currently serves as a military spouse. She lives in the Pacific Northwest with her husband and two sons. Visit her website www.PeggyWhereShouldIGo.com

During the heat of summer (and spring in some places), the pool is a great place to cool off. Splashing around is super fun, but it’s important to be alert to the possible dangers, too.

Stay Safe at the Pool this Summer

Sure, the pool is fun and exciting – a place to relax and kick back for a while.

As a former lifeguard, I am all too aware of just how quickly a fun day at the pool can turn into a nightmare. Before you head out for a day of splashing in the cool water, take a minute to review the basics of pool safety.

Yes, you’re 100% going to hear some or all of these tips throughout the summer at the pool. In my opinion, you can’t hear pool rules and advice to keep you safe often enough.

Keep Littles Close

My husband always rolls his eyes when I insist that my kids stay close at all times when we’re at a pool. But I follow this rule for a reason.

In the middle of splashing around in the pool, it’s incredibly easy to slip and fall or get very literally in over their heads. Stick close to your younger swimmers in the pool.

Babies, toddlers and even younger elementary aged kids need to be watched closely at pools. Yes, even in the kiddie pool or zero entry pools.

Hold babies in your arms or keep a hand on a secure floatation device. Try to stay within arms reach of preschoolers and toddlers, even if it means being constantly in and out of the pool with your child. Older kids who are not confident swimmers should always stay where they can comfortably touch, with their head above water.

Walk, Don’t Run

Sometimes, I might beat the on-duty lifeguards to the punch, shouting “Don’t run!” at kids who are moving a smidge too fast. Sorry, it’s a reflex! But I’ve also seen my fair share of icky pool deck injuries caused by a slip and fall due to running.

Pool decks are super slick and slippery. It’s easy to lose your balance or fall if you’re moving quickly.

Even with the non-slip mats along the edge of the water, the best way to stay safe on deck is to walk carefully. Go slow and stay well away from the edge at all times.

Kids are often the most frequent runners at the pool. They’re excited and want to start having fun, swimming around. Remind them to walk slowly and carefully at all times. If they do run, don’t hesitate to sit them out as a consequence.

Hold your younger children’s hands at all times on the pool deck. It’s incredibly easy for little ones to wander too close to the deep end or forget about walking slowly.

Know Your Limits

One of the scariest lifeguard trainings is a drowning video. On the screen, you see a little boy edge his way out to join his pals in the deep end. This child is not a deep water swimmer. Near his buddies, he releases from the wall, takes a few strokes and silently panics before slipping under the surface. The next movement is a lifeguard diving in to rescue him.

It all took under 30 seconds and his friends never even saw him moving toward them or drowning.

Whether you (or your child) are an experienced or beginner swimmer, it’s important to know your skill set and limits. It’s very tempting to head to the deep end with buddies or take a jump off the high board to be brave.

But swimming in deeper water than you’re used to can also be very risky. Bravery can quickly turn to panic as a swimmer tires, but is unable to reach safety or feels like they must save face in front of their friends.

Kids and adults, especially males, are at risk of pushing their limits at the pool.

Kids need to stay with a parent and/or in their designated areas. Pools typically require that minor children complete a swim assessment before moving into deeper water or jumping slides and diving boards. Color-coded bracelets or other markers are issued to swimmers to indicate where they are permitted to swim. Never swap bracelets with a more experienced swimmer.

For adults, there are not usually swim tests to access the deep end or the slides and diving boards. However, knowing your personal limits at the pool is extremely important.

Keep Parenting at the Pool

The pool is for relaxing, right? Not if you have kids with you! Anytime you are bringing children to the pool, it’s your primary job to keep them safe. Yes, even if they are super experienced swimmers who could one day make the Olympics.

The lifeguard staff is there in the event of a life-threatening emergency. They are not there to fetch your child toys, break up too rough play or constantly remind your child to walk.

There are maybe 12, at most, people on staff to protect several dozen swimmers. If the lifeguards are spending their time correcting minor unsafe behaviors, they might miss a person who is actually in danger.

At the pool, keep on parenting. Watch your child(ren), correct unsafe behavior and issue consequences as needed. Rushing to grab a kickboard could quickly turn into a head wound due to a slip and fall. Breath holding contests can turn into drownings. And a few too many open-mouth dunks underwater could lead to vomiting poolside.

All of these will ruin your relaxing day at the pool. Stay vigilant.

Adult Safely Solo

No kids for you? Perfect! Your day got easier by a good bit.

But it’s still important to stay safe at the pool. Remember to keep alcohol consumption to a minimum since it impairs judgement and could lead to unnecessary risk taking.

Taking breaks from the water to relax, eat, hydrate and reapply sunscreen is also crucial.

With a little extra caution and situational awareness, your relaxing pool day can be super fun!

What are your pool safety tips that often get overlooked? We’d love to share key ways to keep our community safe this summer!

I grew up with a garden – really just a giant sized kitchen garden – full of veggies, herbs and flowers. Every spring, I would watch my Dad till the soil, the my sister and I would follow behind and pick out the rocks. Then we would go to the garden center to pick out seeds and seedlings. After we carefully planted everything, I loved watching each little sprout grow!

Now that we move every three years and are kind of limited in space, my garden has shrunk considerably. Base and rental houses are not exactly excited about having full-on veggie gardens, tilled soil and all.

Grow a Container Garden No Matter Where You’re Planted

So for the last decade or so, I’ve been creating mini container gardens at each of my homes. Now, I’m certainly no expert, but my potted plants have done pretty well so far.

Start Small & Hardy

Whether you grew up around veggie patches or are just starting to dig in the dirt, it’s important to start small. Like really small, as in just one plant.

Pick something hardy and easy to care for with a proven track record of success. If you’re not sure, consult with an expert at a local gardening center or nursery. Shopping small and hyper-local instead of hitting the big box stores is definitely the right move in this situation.

Sometimes, starting with an herb like rosemary or mint is the right move. Both are super sturdy and do well in many environments, including drier climates and sub-tropical zones. I’ve successfully cultivated thriving rosemary plants in both of these locations!

Pick the Right Pots & Soil

Not every plant grows in the same soil or needs the same kinds of pots and containers. Each type of plant needs a different amount of space above the ground, plus depth and room to spread out their roots.

Before you stick your new plants into just any old pots, do a little research into what they need. Ask that local garden expert what your new sprout needs. Keep in mind that you might need to swap out pots as your plant grows up, too.

Just like pots and containers, each plant needs a specific type of soil. Dirt has different pH levels and nutrient contents. Plants will respond to some soil better than others.

For example, my Mom tried to grow hydrangeas for years and years. Every spring, they would grow beautiful, lush leaves but never even bud or blossom. Turns out, the soil was way too acidic and well irrigated for the bushes to fully develop. Once she added in a different fertilizer, she’s had amazing giant flowers every year!

Be Realistic About the Work

Plants take work and space, some more than others. Before you commit to growing pumpkins and tomatoes, know what you’re getting into first.

Every garden needs to be watered and weeded, but there are ways to make that simpler. Drip irrigation systems can help make watering more hands-off. Plus, there are ways to set up your garden, like the square foot method, to maximize space and cut down on weeds.

Setting up a schedule to delegate plant tending duties can be super helpful. It also helps you to keep track of watering and weeding to make sure that you don’t over tend your pots.

Plant within Your Space Limits

You also need to consider your space limitations. Vine-type plants, like pumpkins and cukes, need a good bit of space. Not super ideal if all you’ve got is a 4×4 raised bed.

But there are ways to grow lots of plants in small spaces, like training vine plants with lighter veggies or fruits up a trellis or using another vertical gardening technique.

Co-planting techniques, like the infamous Three Sisters (beans, squash, corn), can greatly maximize your space and increase your output.

Grow What You Like

Pick veggies, herbs and flowers you actually enjoy. If you don’t love tomatoes, don’t plant them!

I love roses and try to find a way to plant at least one rosebush at every single one of our houses. In fact, my original rose garden is still blooming in base housing at Camp Pendleton! My Okinawan roses are about to be passed down to a neighbor.

I also always grow rosemary and basil, plus other herbs that might be harder to find. In Okinawa, whole leaf sage is really limited. So I grew my own! Those leaves sure made my Thanksgiving turkey super tasty!

Whether you’re aiming for a colorful plot full of blooms or an ultra-productive veggie patch, follow your heart and what you can honestly handle! Sticking to these guidelines, plus consulting with a local gardening center, can help you have a positive container gardening experience.

Do you container garden? Share your best tips and tricks with our community!

The silent ranks, holding down the home front, doing all the things. Military spouses are there, 24/7/365, providing support for their serving spouses, keeping things even keeled at home. Too often, we accept the service and sacrifice of military spouses as just what happens.

But military spouses do quite a lot to make sure that our troops can complete their missions. This May, show the military spouses in your life just how much their dedication means to you!

Celebrate Military Spouses on May 10!

Honoring military spouses is really pretty simple – mostly, just say how you feel. But if you’d like to do a little more to show your appreciation, try these tips and ideas!

Celebrate MilSpouses in Your Unit

Host a celebration event in honor of Military Spouse Appreciation Day! Plan a small luncheon, brunch or coffee social and invite the spouses in your unit. You can use the on-base MWR facilities to help plan and coordinate your event.

At your event, give away prizes and honor individual spouses for their efforts to support the unit or base.

If you don’t have the funds for an event, you could find another way to honor spouses. Send cards to the spouses in your unit with a handwritten note of appreciation. You could also share a video message from the command team on social media.

Celebrate MilSpouses in Your Home

Are you a married service member? Then you should 100% be honoring the military spouse in your life on May 10!

Try these easy ideas:

• Schedule a spa day: just a simple single treatment or a full day of pampering
• Make it a date: take your spouse out on the town, eating at your favorite places and maybe catching a movie
• Say it with flowers or plants: bring home a big bouquet of flowers or a plant to add to the garden
• DIY dinner date: make a special meal at home – then do the dishes
• Write a note: say “thanks” for all the ways your spouse makes your military missions possible in a thoughtful note
• Take over at home: give your spouse the day off, while you take over all the household details – it’ll give you a new appreciation for all they do

Mostly, just taking time out of your day to show how much you care is what’s important. Your spouse does a lot and sacrifices quite a bit to make your family’s military life as smooth as possible.

Treat Your MilSpouse Friends

Military spouses know that our biggest supports are each other. Through deployments and trainings, long nights and early mornings, your fellow military spouses are 100% there for you.

Take time on May 10 to show your core crew of military spouse friends your appreciation.

Make the day special with these ideas:

• Go out for brunch or lunch: pick a cool cafe or swank restaurant for a nice meal out together
• Host a MilSpouse night in: invite your closest pals over for a night in, complete with dinner and drinks; ask your collective spouses to watch your kids
• Have a fun night out: grab some sitters (or your spouses) and head out for a fancy dinner and drinks in town
• Drop off flowers: show your best military spouse friends the love with a small bouquet of flowers; give your blooms at lunch or leave a sweet surprise at their door
• Send a note: send a sweet card to your friends, showing your appreciation for their support and love

For some military spouses, you might be the only person to show your appreciation on May 10. Spread the love and show just how much having a strong community means to you!

Show Yourself Appreciation

Let’s be real: not many people outside of the military community even know about or recognize Military Spouse Appreciation Day. So, fellow military spouses, treat yourself to a little pampering and relaxation today.

• Enjoy a nice beverage: relax at a cafe or restaurant, even your own dining room table, savoring the beverage of your choice
• Buy yourself blooms: brighten up your day with a personally picked bouquet with all your favorite flowers
• Grab lunch: treat yourself to lunch at your favorite local spot
• Just sit: seriously, take a minute and just sit down, do nothing for a while
• Binge watch a guilty pleasure: host a tv or movie marathon of your all-time favorites; munch on yummy snacks while you watch

No matter what happens or who else remembers Military Spouse Appreciation Day, it’s important to take time to recognize the sacrifices you make for your family and our nation. Military spouses play a vital role in the success of military troops and missions.

How will you be honoring military spouses on May 10? Share your creative ways to show your appreciation!