Military Life News

Military Life News, Commissary Rewards and Military Discounts

How I Feel About Service Member-Only Military Discounts

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by Amanda Marksmeier, Guest Contributor

“Sorry, we only offer discounts to service members.”

As military spouses we have all heard this statement.

I find it ironic. My husband and I are partners in life, we share everything including a bank account. The money I use when making a purchase is as much his as it is mine.

Furthermore, the reason he is not with me is because he is either deployed, in the field or gone for training.

I don’t believe we as members of the military community are entitled to military discounts, but it is nice when a business offers a military discount to military spouses.

When the United States was engaged in two wars with the scars of 9/11 still seeping and American pride swelled within us, military discounts were a way to honor service members and their families. As the wars drag on and disappear from national headlines, the military community fades from the forefront of the minds of American civilians.

Unless you have a personal connection to the military you are unaware of the challenges and sacrifices of military families. So, allow me to share a few numbers with you.

The military spouse unemployment rate is estimated at 16%; the national unemployment rate is 3.9%. Sixteen percent doesn’t sound like a lot, but it equates to 104,000 out of work military spouses. This number does not reflect spouses who gave up their job search or are underemployed.

The average income for a service member is between $40,00 and $52,000 annually. The U.S. average annual household income is approximately $73,000. For those doing the math that is a difference of $21,000!

But military families don’t pay for housing or health insurance, right?! No, as a matter of fact we pay for both necessities. While military families can live in base housing it is not free.

Service members receive a housing stipend or basic housing allowance (which is included in the $52,000) but for families that choose base housing this money is recouped by the housing offices to cover living expenses.

Military members pay health insurance premiums just like everyone else. Granted our premiums are much lower than other insurance premiums but we pay them nonetheless.

Here are some more numbers to consider.

The average military family will move six to nine times. The government pays for the move, right? Yes and no. The government approves and pays to move our household goods up to a certain weight which is based on the service member’s rank, not how many dependents are in the household. They will also cover travel expenses such as gas, hotel stays and meals depending on the distance traveled.

What they don’t cover is the cost to ship a vehicle because your newly licensed teen is not experienced enough to drive across the country.

Another expense that is not covered is the three weeks of hotel fees because base housing is unavailable when you arrive on post.

A huge out-of-pocket expense for moving military families is food. For families living in a hotel or an empty home awaiting household goods, their only option is to eat out.

I know what you are thinking, no cooking or dirty dishes, sign me up. I am here to tell you, besides the cost, which can easily average $100 or more a day for a family of four, eating out gets old quickly.

My goal in sharing this is not to gain sympathy or “poor mouth” but simply to provide information by the numbers.

Many military families struggle financially, so a military discount not only helps their bottom line but boosts morale and gives a feeling of appreciation.

I have been a military spouse for almost 13 years and I am grateful for every moment of it. Military life has taken me many places and introduced me to amazing people. It is a life I chose but that doesn’t mean it is easy or cheap.

Our family has lived in six homes. My husband has been deployed for more than 60 months and has been away for far too many field exercises and trainings to count.

When I am offered a military discount on my purchase it makes me feel like someone is acknowledging and appreciating the commitment I made to my husband.

What are your thoughts on service member-only military discounts?

Amanda Marksmeier is an Army wife and mother of four. She works as an employment specialist assisting the military community in achieving their career goals. Amanda is also a contributing writer for a quarterly employment journal and has written for several military affiliated blogs.

Cheers to the Commissaries Selling Beer, Wine

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You read that correctly – commissaries will begin selling beer and wine this summer.

The exact date hasn’t been announced, but it is official. A memo written by Robert Wilkie, Under Secretary of Defense for Personnel and Readiness, stated that commissaries will begin selling both beer and wine. This should happen by the end of July.

I was excited when I found out commissaries would be selling both beer and wine.

OK, I wasn’t nearly as excited about the beer as I was about the wine. I’m more of a wine person. I shop at the commissary weekly and this will be so much more convenient to buy both groceries and wine in one place rather than driving to the other end of town just for wine. It looks better when you buy a full cart of groceries with a bottle of wine than buying only wine. I tell myself that anyway.

The Dahlgren commissary, the closest one to me, is tiny. It has six aisles and usually just one cashier. I love it though. Somehow I manage to buy most of my week’s worth of groceries in that little place.

I can’t help but think, where are they going to fit the wine and beer? What products will lose placement? Will they sell the type of wine I like or am I getting excited over this for no reason?

Selling beer and wine in larger commissaries means more of a selection of both. Luckily in the D.C. area, where I live, there are a number of commissaries.

I was lucky enough to be at the grand opening of the new commissary at Fort Belvoir last year. It is massive. I will be going back to see what their beer and wine selection looks like once it’s on the shelves. I’m sure it will be much larger than the one available at Dahlgren.

It will be interesting to see how the prices compare as well.

The commissaries have run a few tests of selling beer and wine previously, but this will be the first time they will be sold at all commissaries as a standard.

There are a few specifics that were released. Commissaries will purchase beer and wine from the exchanges and resell it to commissary patrons. This is to hopefully reduce the impact beer and wine sales at commissaries will have on sales of the same items at exchanges. Profits from sales at military exchanges fund on-base MWR programs and officials don’t want to take away from that.

Prices therefore are supposed to be comparable to those at exchanges.

Related: Why I Think Military Wives Are More Likely to Binge Drink

Item pricing at commissaries moved to variable pricing last year. That means that all commissaries don’t sell products at the same price now. Prices vary based on the market. Wine and beer prices will therefore also be different from place to place. According to Robert Wilkie, prices should be comparable to those at local grocery stores.

One thing that local grocery stores don’t have that commissaries might have is hard liquor.

The Subcommittee on Military Personnel recently tasked the Secretary of Defense with having a study conducted on adding the sale of distilled spirits to commissaries. In this study, they will look at local and state laws as well as provide estimated revenue from sales. The secretary will brief the Committee on Armed Services by September.

Your favorite alcoholic beverage might be on the shelf of your local commissary before long if things work out.

When will your commissary have beer and wine?

Unfortunately, I can’t give you a set date as those dates haven’t been made public yet. Check with your local commissary for an announcement. Wine and beer are set to make their debut by the end of July.

What do you think of the commissaries selling wine and beer?

Should I Feed or Tip Our Movers?

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It’s PCS season and once again military spouses are asking the big question, should I tip or feed the movers?

Should I Feed or Tip My Movers During a PCS?

Do you provide food for your movers? What kind of food do you give them?

There is a wide difference in opinion here. Some people always tip, others tip based on performance and for some, the thought of tipping has never crossed their mind.

The same goes for feeding the people that pack up all your precious belongings. Many military families choose to feed the moving crews in some way but there are still people that do not.

There are people that both tip and feed the movers and some that choose to only do one of those things.

There are also people who do neither.

Everyone has a strong opinion on the matter as well.

What Food Should I Feed My Packers or Movers When We PCS?

If you choose to provide food for the moving team, what do you feed them?

Many military spouses responded to this question saying that they buy pizza. I have bought pizza many times. My parents bought the movers pizza when I was growing up as an Army brat so that was the norm, or so I thought.

Also, in the early stages of military life, families don’t tend to have much money to spare on individual meals for a large group of people. We didn’t.

After a multitude of moves, my perspective, as well as wallet, has changed.

Now I give the movers a few options for lunch and then my husband goes to pick it up. I also always make sure to have cold water in the fridge for everyone.

Who wants to eat pizza every day? Could you imagine spending hours packing up things and getting pizza constantly?

Some military spouses say that they provide breakfast or lunch and some provide both. Most said they have water for them and offer pizza, subs, Chick-fil-A or KFC.

A few said they offer some of the beverages they aren’t moving with to the movers. One military spouse said this:

 “My husband once gave them bottles of booze. They loved him for it. I was mortified.”

How Much Should I Tip Our Packers During a PCS?

I haven’t tipped our packers during a PCS. Actually, I hadn’t thought about it until someone recently brought it up.

One military spouse had a good point. She said, “I tip the groomer and nail salon techs for goodness’ sakes.” If she’s going to tip for those services, it makes sense to tip the people who take care of her precious belongings.

When asked if they tip, a number of women said that they were told by the TMO, Traffic Management Office, that tipping was not allowed. Not all moving companies follow this however. Even if that is their policy, some movers will still take the cash tip.

In the civilian world, tipping is part of proper etiquette. The average tip is $20 per mover. That could really add up for military moves if you have separate people that pack your belongings up and then unpack at your destination.

I have had as many as eight people packing up our home. There are a lot of costs involved in moving and an additional $160 for the packers’ tips is not necessarily something I would want to spend my money on. That cost really adds up if you have to tip just as much when the next group unpacks at your new duty station.

Related: 5 Steps You Can Take Today to Make Your PCS Go Smoothly This Summer

Everyone has a different perspective however.

Some people only tip if they notice that the movers are particularly friendly or pack things how they want them to be packed. If you choose to tip, make sure you give the money to each mover personally. Don’t just give it to the leader of the packing crew. They might not actually divvy up the money. Also, handing out tips to each person shows that you recognize their individual effort.

Hopefully, the movers are grateful no matter if you provide a meal or a tip them.

If you are going to buy a meal, give them some options and let them choose. They will likely appreciate having something other than pizza.

If you decide to tip, you choose how much to give them. While $20 per person is the norm in the civilian world, it isn’t necessarily the same for military moves.

Share your PCS tips with us. Do you provide food for your movers? What kind of food do you give them?

Our Guide to Sending Care Packages to Your Service Member

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by Amanda Marksmeier, Guest Contributor

Whether you are shipping your first care package or your last it can be difficult to know what to include and what to leave out.

Items such as firearms, explosives and radioactive materials should not be included, but did you know many foreign countries ban the shipping and receiving of playing cards, used clothes and saccharine?

Our Guide to Sending Care Packages to Your Service Member

Themed care packages are all the rage. Not feeling creative? No problem, search Pinterest for military care package ideas.

Your Don’t Pack It Guide for Deployment Care Packages

Our service members deploy to countries with strict religious beliefs and rules. If you are sending care packages to countries such as Iraq, Afghanistan, Syria or any other predominately Muslim country do not pack pork products. Many people in these regions follow diets which prohibit foods made from pigs, so that means no bacon bits.

While we are on the subject of religion, anti-Muslim books, articles, and movies are strictly forbidden so don’t send them. Also, anything considered lewd or pornographic should not be included. It is important to be respectful of others’ customs and beliefs.

Cash and high-valued items should be left at home. Packages can “disappear,” be damaged or simply lost in the mail.

Pro-tip: if you can’t afford to lose it, don’t pack it!

This goes for items that hold sentimental value as well. While you may be tempted to send family heirlooms don’t, these items can’t be replaced if lost or damaged.

What You Should Send in Deployment Care Packages

Now comes the fun part, what you can include in a care package.

Non-perishable food is the No. 1 requested item. Think canned tuna, instant meals, jerky, ramen, I could go on, but you get the idea. In many cases, soldiers miss meals due to missions or the inability to make it to the DFAC. Your service member will be grateful to have a meal from home after a long day.

Care packages are a perfect excuse to print all those pictures saved in your digital cloud. Service members can hang photos in their bunk, tape them to vehicles or keep them in the pockets of their uniforms.

It’s comforting to have photos of friends and family near you on deployment.

Fragrant soaps and washes should be packed separately in plastic bags. I once sent my husband a box of soaps (not in plastic bags) packed with candies. He ended up with candies that tasted like soap!

More Care Packages Tips

Mailing packages is expensive! The U.S. Post Office offers free flat rate boxes to help with the costs. Care packages in flat rate boxes can be sent to APO/FPO/DPO at domestic shipping rates.

Save a trip to the post office by ordering your shipping supplies for free through the USPS website. Schedule a pick-up, pay for shipping and complete the customs forms all online at https://www.usps.com/ship/apo-fpo-dpo.htm.

Oh, those darn customs forms! Don’t be afraid. Custom forms aren’t as scary as they appear. All you need is your service member’s address, the list of items and an estimated value of each item in the care package.

The Click-N-Ship option on the USPS website walks through the steps to complete customs forms. Custom forms need to be completed for each package you send.

Related: Tips on Sending a Care Package to a Military Dog

Themed care packages are all the rage. Not feeling creative? No problem, borrow someone else’s ideas. Carefully crafted boxes are posted all over social media. Visit military spouse Facebook pages to ask for care package ideas. Also search Pinterest for military care packages. Have fun, be creative and think “inside” the box.

Books, movies and magazines make wonderful additions to care packages. Deployed service members work long hours in harsh conditions so when there is downtime entertainment is desperately needed.

I am sure everyone remembers the “Frozen” videos with service members belting out “Let it Go.” You know they watched the movie a dozen times to learn the song. Maybe we’ll be blessed with “This is Me” sing-a-longs in the future.

Add extra items so your service member can share with his or her battle buddies. Remember not everyone has someone to send them care packages.

The most important part of a care package is the “care” that is included. Packages remind the men and woman serving they have not been forgotten.

What questions do you have about sending care packages?

Amanda Marksmeier is an Army wife and mother of four. She works as an employment specialist assisting the military community in achieving their career goals. Amanda is also a contributing writer for a quarterly employment journal and has written for several military affiliated blogs.

How Is My Husband Always Gone For Mother’s Day And Home For Father’s Day?

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Ahhhhh, Mother’s Day. That glorious Sunday in May when mothers everywhere lounge luxuriously in bed.

We’re all peacefully waiting for our badly buttered toast to arrive, paired with an alcohol heavy mimosa. And then the whole family skips to brunch with happy, shiny faces.

Everything is right on Mother’s Day, as we celebrate the years of excruciating physical labor it takes to raise up a child. Many moms mark this occasion with flowers, wine, candy, cards and a trip to the spa.

Except for me.

And I’m guessing a bunch of other military spouses too.

Instead of my sweet baby angels bringing me cold cereal, I was awakened at zero dark thirty by my child screaming. I rolled over to nudge my husband, reminding him that it’s my day to sleep in, except, oh wait, I’m riding solo today.

Just like many Mother’s Days past, and certainly in the future as well, the military has thoughtfully scheduled field exercises today.

How Is My Husband Always Gone For Mother's Day And Home For Father's Day?

This year I’m observing delayed Mother’s Day on June 17, which just happens to be Father’s Day.

Guess who won’t have any work obligations on June 17 though? My husband.

Instead, he’ll probably be at the golf course celebrating Father’s Day. All alone. While I handle the kids by myself. Again.

Why is my husband always gone for Mother’s Day, but home for Father’s Day?

It seems like a cruel joke the military likes to play on me every year.

“Hahahaha, let’s leave all the non-active duty moms at home without their spouse today. Oh, but make sure the men are all home for Father’s Day. Can’t miss playing a few holes, am I right?”

Well, this year the joke’s on you, Dad! Because I’m observing delayed Mother’s Day due to scheduling conflicts. My personal Mother’s Day just happens to be on Father’s Day. Weird, right?

It seems like you might have had an OK time at your “exercise” in Seoul. I heard the all-you-can-eat Korean barbecue was delicious. The K-Pop karaoke looked fun too. I’m sure having a hotel room all to yourself with no one needing you to wipe their nose was pure torture.

Bonus: you got paid to be there!

Since you got your special day early, I’m going to go ahead and take mine right now.

When Dad’s Gone in May, Mom Plays in June

You’ll get to celebrate the joys of fatherhood the same way I basked in the glow of motherhood while you were gone. In short: alone.

That’s right, the kids are all yours today. Because you should spend Father’s Day celebrating with the precious little tykes who call you Dad.

Let’s start the day early. I’ll head out for a long sunrise run so that you can be the first face the kids see in the morning. Such a wonderful gift!

Next, you can enjoy a chilled coffee over soggy cereal. The handwritten cards will tug at your heartstrings.

Then, head out to the beach, pool or playground. Really, go wherever your heart desires. If you can get them to handle sitting in the cart, take them to the golf course. If not, mini golf is basically the same thing.

I won’t even be mad when you bring them back loaded up with sugar and sticky with melted ice cream. They have summer camp tomorrow!

While you’re out celebrating, I’ll make sure to prep the grill and food for you to cook when you return. I want you to have the honor of getting those steaks just right.

As for the middle part of the day, I was planning on having a working me-day. I’ll field some emails, check Facebook and then head off to be tortured at the spa. I’m talking brunch, massage, pedicure and facial. All while sipping champagne. It’s going to be terrible.

You can swing by to get me on your way back from mini golf.

How does your family handle missed holidays or special days? Share your tips in the comments!

I Crossed the Unwritten Officer and Enlisted Friendship Line

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I joined the military spouse ranks at the end of an era. Which specific era, you might wonder? Well, the end of the blatant separation of spouses into “officer” and “enlisted.”

When my husband was wrapping up his stint at initial training, all of us wives (and it was only wives) were herded into an auditorium and given the rundown on life as a USMC spouse. We learned the ropes from a seasoned spouse and were handed a copy of Parade Rest.

We were lectured about protocol and decorum. I, the dependent spouse, was a direct reflection on my husband and his career. My behavior needed to be impeccable at all times. The correct place settings and seating arrangements for every possible formal and informal dinner party was reviewed in my new book.

Oh, and the rules against officer and enlisted fraternization were reviewed. But I didn’t really pay close attention to that part of the seminar. I guess it covered spouses, too. I mean, it must have, based on how other newly minted military spouses were acting.

I crossed the unwritten officer and enlisted friendship line.

And I don’t care. Because that line isn’t a real thing. It’s something that someone way back in the “good old days” created.

Some of the friends that I do life best with happen to be on the “other side” of that line.

The whole rank thing came up once at the beginning of each friendship. And then it was done.

No one blinked.

No one flinched.

Our spouses’ ranks aren’t even discussed, except for a hearty congratulations when someone gets promoted.

I Crossed the Unwritten Officer and Enlisted Friendship Line

We’re all just spouses. By “just” I really mean without the officer or enlisted caveat attached.

I have just a few criteria for my friends. First, be kind to my kids, but don’t be afraid to make them toe the line.

Also, it would be nice to enjoy a few similar hobbies. I’m into true crime, running, reading, writing and being salty about military life.

Finally, I like to have adventures and try new things.

Can you hang with that? Great! You’re in.

This attitude is becoming more and more the norm of military life and friendship among spouses.

The atmosphere has changed slowly over the last decade or so. I’m so glad that it has too. It makes everything much nicer and friendlier. Having an “all-hands” spouses club unites all of us for the good and, honestly, the food.

It wasn’t always like this, even in the very recent past.

I remember overhearing troubling conversations as a young(er) spouse. Harsh, untrue stereotypes were repeated. Some folks thought they could “just tell” what rank someone’s spouse wore based on their accent, clothing, number of children or perceived education level.

When I volunteered in the family readiness group at our first duty station, a few spouses liked to throw down rank very obviously. As if it made a difference to who got the last word.

Related: 10 Situations that Hurt a MilSpouse Friendship

One of my friends from that experience happened to be married to an enlisted Marine. After all the nonsense at my military spouse indoctrination, I was nervous about venturing into this friendship. I didn’t want to create a situation. I hesitated to connect on Facebook. I paused before socializing outside of unit events.

Then my husband set me straight.

We’re all just spouses.

By “just” I really mean without the officer or enlisted caveat attached. At the end of the day, we married the person our hearts connected to the most.

It wasn’t because of what was on their collars, but because of who they are as a human.

Although, if we’re being honest, how they look in dress uniform might have played a role in the process.

Breaking through that invisible O/E friendship barrier was the best thing I’ve done as a spouse. When I decided to stop listening to the stereotypes and the unwritten rules, I gained a whole lot of love, light and laughter.

I’ve got a whole army of amazing friends that I know I can call on, day or night, for anything. Whatever our spouses do, we’ve got each other. And to be honest, none of us are really 100% sure what our active duty other half does some days.

We’re all in this together, all of us military spouses. We are all just trying to get through this wild ride, with our sanity mostly intact. So cross that “line” if you spot a kindred spirit. It will be so worth it.

We want to hear from you! Tell us what “rules” you’ve proudly broken as a military spouse!

Invest in Your Career with an Affordable Master’s Degree

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This is a sponsored post written by me on behalf of the California University of Pennsylvania. All opinions are 100% mine.

Do you want a degree with a 98% job placement rate?

Did you know that a master’s degree in exercise science and health promotion from the California University of Pennsylvania has a 98% placement rate?

Veterans and military spouses can invest in their careers with an affordable online Master of Science in exercise science and health promotion from the California University of Pennsylvania. Cal U’s 100% online program provides a flexible higher ed option for those who think they don’t have the time or the money to earn an advanced degree.

Through this online master’s program, you can be enrolled as a graduate student while working full time.

You don’t have to choose between attending college classes and earning a paycheck.

You can study at a historic state university from the comforts of your home with your high-speed internet connection.

Cal U students are enrolled in online courses from all 50 states and from more than 20 countries, and university officials point out that many students enroll while on active duty with the military.

Did you know that Cal U was the first college to launch a 100% online master’s degree program in exercise science?

Through their interactive approach to online curriculum, Cal U students can engage fully with their professors and classmates. You won’t feel like you’re missing out because you’re logging into class from a laptop instead of sitting in a lecture hall.

Invest for Less Time, Less Money

Veterans and military spouses can earn an online master’s degree in less than 2 years and without staggering student debt.

Cal U’s master’s degree program, which includes professional certification recognized by the National Academy of Sports Medicine, can be completed in 12 to 18 months. With this streamlined approach to grad school, you can earn your master’s degree before you move to your new duty station.

The California University of Pennsylvania Office of Military and Veterans Affairs offers comprehensive support for veterans, eligible dependents, service members of the National Guard and Reserve, and active duty service members. They help veterans maximize their GI Bill benefits.

Cal U also offers discounted tuition costs for active duty members and veterans of all military branches, as well as their spouses and eligible dependents. You can find out more information about this program at its Cal U Global Online website.

Invest in a Career That Leads to Employment Opportunities

A master’s degree in exercise science and health promotion offers veterans and military spouses an investment in employment opportunities. Cal U graduates are leaders in fitness, athletics, health and wellness at companies throughout the country.

I’m amazed by the variety of jobs that you can do with a master’s degree in exercise science and health promotions.

You can work at a hospital, at a fitness company, at a health care company or with a professional sports team.

You can teach at a community college or for an online certification program.

You can work for the Department of Defense or you can be an entrepreneur.

Earning a master’s degree in exercise science and health promotions is the first step to a dynamic career.

In today’s economy, everyone is searching for an in-demand job that will give them the flexibility to work in any location around the country. Everyone hopes for a job with a competitive salary. Everyone wants to feel satisfaction at their job. Everyone wants to feel like they are contributing to their community and helping those in their community.

At least that’s what I want for my career. I also want to be in a career field with 98% placement.

Do you?

Invest in your career today by earning a Master of Science’s degree with Cal U. Click here to learn more about the California University of Pennsylvania.

30 Military-Friendly Wineries and Breweries You’ll Want to Sample

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May is National Wine Month. What better way to celebrate National Wine Month than with a tasting at a military-friendly winery?

There are more than 8,700 wineries in the United States. Many wineries offer military discounts on tastings or free tastings to veterans and military spouses. Here is a list of military-friendly wineries in Napa and Sonoma.

15 Napa Wineries that Offer a Military Discount

Start your wine tour at the oldest winery in Napa Valley, Charles Krug. It also happens to be the first tasting room in California. At Charles Krug you can enjoy a five glass wine tasting. It’s usually $20, but the fee is waived for active duty service members.

Robert Mondavi has made Napa Valley what it is today. Enjoy a military discount and great wines at Robert Mondavi.

Hall Winery generally has a $40 tasting fee, but it is free for service members. Service members can enjoy a free glass of wine as well.

Domaine Carneros has a military discount on tastings as well as 10% off merchandise.

V. Sattui Winery has delicious wines as well as a military discount.

Grgich Hills Estate offers free wine tastings to service members.

Domaine Chandon has a 20% military discount.

Mumm Napa not only offers service members a free tour and wine tasting, but they also have a military discount of 30% off purchases.

Rombauer Vineyards offers free wine tastings to service members.

Raymond Vineyards offers a 10% military discount.

Peju offers free wine tastings for service members.

Beaulieu Vineyard provides free wine tastings to military service members.

Beringer Vineyards has a program where service members can enjoy a free glass of wine.

Cakebread offers free wine tastings to service members.

Monticello Vineyards may be a small family-owned and -operated winery, but they really know what they are doing. Enjoy a free wine tasting with their friendly staff.

7 Sonoma County Wineries That Have a Military Discount

There are more than 425 wineries in Sonoma. Here are seven military-friendly ones not to be missed.

Murphey Goode offers free wine tastings to veterans. I love that they support Operation Homefront, which is a nonprofit charity that gives assistance to service members. Murphey Goode donates 50 cents from each bottle of their Homefront Red Blend to the organization. While that doesn’t sound like a lot per bottle, it has generated over $300,000 a year.

At Francis Ford Coppola Winery you’ll enjoy a free wine tasting as well as a 10% military discount.

Adastra offers free wine tasting to military couples.

Alexander Valley Vineyards provides a free reserve tasting for service members.

Highway 12 Vineyards and Winery provides free wine tastings.

One last winery to mention in California is Tackitt Family Vineyards in Paso Robles. It is dear to my heart. They produce a collection of wines labeled EOD Cellars. The owner is a Navy Explosive Ordnance Disposal (EOD) veteran. My husband is an EOD Tech. A portion of the profits from these wines goes to the EOD Warrior Foundation, which supports wounded EOD techs.

8 Military-Friendly Breweries Owned by Veterans

There are also veteran-owned breweries. The eight below are ones not to be missed if you are in their area.

Honor Brewing Company is operated by an Army veteran, a Gold Star son and one other partner. Their tasting room opens this year.

Heritage Brewing Company has its own nonprofit that supports veterans. A portion of their proceeds go toward it.

Full Tilt Brewing in Baltimore, Md., is run by a veteran and a former DoD worker.

Young Veterans Brewing Company, owned by two Army veterans, is in Virginia Beach. You can visit their taproom and take a tour there.

Veterans United Craft Brewery in Jacksonville, Fl., is owned by a former Naval flight officer.

Railhouse Brewery is owned by Army, Navy and Air Force veterans. You can visit their taproom in North Carolina.

Red Leg Brewing Company in Colorado Springs has a wonderful taproom.

Fair Winds Brewing Company is one of the top 50 fastest growing breweries in America. You can visit their taproom in Fairfax, Va.

With all of these military-friendly wineries and breweries, you’re sure to have a good time supporting veterans and businesses that support our military community.

Are you looking for a military discount? Sign up for MilitaryShoppers’ newsletter and you’ll have savings delivered directly to your inbox.

How Being a Mother Changed My Life as a Military Spouse

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My life completely changed when I became a mother. When I saw our son for the first time my whole world changed. Though there were many long nights of sleeplessness, there were also plenty of moments of pure joy. We brought this tiny person into the world. He was ours to love, to teach and to enjoy.

I don’t think it’s possible to know true love and joy until you’ve held your baby in your arms.

I never thought of myself as an emotional or sentimental person, but I certainly am now that I’m a mother. I feel the tears in my eyes when I think about how much he means to me. I love our son. It has been an emotional journey watching him grow.

My husband deployed when our son was nine months old. Deployments can be hard on families, and this one was so much more trying now that I was a mother for the first time and alone with a baby.

I loved seeing our son grow, try new things and explore his surroundings. It seemed like only a blink of an eye and our baby had turned into a toddler. Where did the time go? I missed the baby stage but looked forward to the next steps. I missed the bond that came with nursing once he stopped, but I still get plenty of snuggles since my son loves to cuddle.

How Being a Mother Changed My Life as a Military Spouse

I love the moments when I’m holding our baby girl and she reaches her tiny hand for my cheek. But it makes me sad to think that my husband is missing these moments with her.

Our son is now four years old and almost nine months ago we welcomed our second child into the world, a little girl. My husband deployed just before she turned three months old. That was incredibly hard. I was left with two kids for six months. Some days were really hard and others were amazing.

I thought our son would be jealous of the baby but I couldn’t have been more wrong. He adores her. He wants to hold her, feed her and share his toys with her. He smiles and talks to her and she smiles back. I love the moments when they just stop and look at each other smiling. It brings great joy to my heart. I’m so sad that my husband missed all of this once again.

Related: Celebrating Mother’s Day During Deployments

Last night we had an amazing homecoming. My husband returned from his sixth deployment. I’ve picked him up plenty of times, but this time was completely different. The excitement our four year old showed in anticipation of his arrival was enough to make anyone smile. He stood in the airport with his welcome home sign waving his American flag waiting eagerly for Daddy to come off the plane.

I don’t think there were many dry eyes when everyone heard him shout “Daddy” and run to his father. It was a moment of pure joy.

I love being a mother and seeing these moments. There will be more deployments that will come all too soon, but there will be plenty of time to enjoy our family as a whole. I’m so happy that my husband is home to enjoy our children. I hope with our daughter that he gets to see some of the milestones he missed with our son. As a mother, I couldn’t imagine missing any milestone.

There’s a strong bond between a mother and her child. I love the moments when I’m holding our baby girl and she gazes up at me and reaches her tiny hand for my cheek. Those moments are fleeting so I will cherish every one.

Related: Don’t Forget Military Moms

Though it’s sad to see her grow so fast, it’s amazing to watch her learn and explore. I look forward to seeing her personality grow and to see how she and her brother bond. Being a mother is a remarkable thing and I wouldn’t trade it for the world.

How I Feel About Military Spouse Appreciation Day

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On Military Spouse Appreciation Day, I’ll be tagged in dozens of Facebook posts. I’ll tear up reading the heartfelt words of my military spouse friends.

Besides that I don’t think much else will happen on May 11.

Let’s be honest: Military Spouse Appreciation Day is about military spouses connecting with other military spouses.

This is our day to express how much the support of our community and friends has helped us over the years. That’s important, don’t get me wrong.

I love seeing my friends post emotional video montages or write emotional posts that celebrate the ties binding us together. It’s a reminder that I’m not alone and I’ve always got folks watching my six.

Yes, there are events held on military bases around the world honoring the contributions of military spouses. There are job fairs, appreciation luncheons and educational workshops.

All of this is great. Honestly, it’s just nice to be recognized in any small way.

How I Feel About Military Spouse Appreciation Day

Maybe I’ve grown a little salty over the years, but Military Spouse Appreciation Day seems like just more lip service.

The statements of our nation’s leaders, from President Reagan to the present day, express that they see us. They know how much we’ve given of ourselves in support of our spouse and our country.

But this support for military spouses isn’t followed by action.

Maybe I’ve grown a little salty over the years, but Military Spouse Appreciation Day seems like just more lip service.

If our leaders wanted to show military spouses actual appreciation, there are tons of things that they could do.

1. Fix Tricare

Right now military families are receiving letters from Tricare that show they’ll lose their coverage or plan due to failure to pay. Here’s the problem: they have been paying and the system didn’t record it. Military families are caught in the middle between yet another provider network switch and terrible communication.

Tricare operates on the lowest bidder system. While this might be great for, say, choosing a landscaping service at the White House, it’s not the way to do health care. Medical professionals are being dropped by Humana due to paperwork processing errors, even though the doctors did their due diligence in advance. Many medical professionals will not accept Tricare at all because of the paperwork headaches and rock-bottom reimbursement rates.

This leaves military families without civilian options for care. Families with children who have special needs are left without ABA therapy, speech therapy, physical therapy or occupational therapy. Families located far from a comprehensive MTF are caught between the politics of Tricare and the boots on the ground reality.

There are a plethora of issues with health care in our country and Tricare is just the tip of the iceberg. But it’s a pain point for many military families.

Show us that you truly see us by fixing Tricare.

2. Increase Funding for Our Schools

When military families are asked about their PCS concerns, finding a good school is near the top. This is because our federal and state governments have, largely, walked away from public schools. They’ve put in place policies that undercut education funding for years. Buildings are crumbling, learning materials are out of date and teachers are working multiple jobs just to keep their heads above water.

The plan floated by Secretary of Education Betsy DeVos is a small, very small, step to acknowledge this critical military family issue. However, her plan provides minimal funding to a fraction of families all while stripping public schools of money they need to keep the lights on.

This is not how we operate an education system. And by their continued neglect of schools everywhere, not just near military bases, our nation’s leaders are shouting loud and clear that they do not care about our struggles.

Appreciate us and our military kids by taking meaningful action to fully fund schools across the country and pay all teachers appropriate wages.

3. Clean Up Our Contaminated Water

We already question whether this lifestyle is harming our children due to saying goodbye to their friends over and over. We tell ourselves that moving is building resiliency and that seeing the world is a fair trade for our wandering life.

Then you wake up to the news that 126 bases have contaminated water.

Now I’m not only worrying about psychologically damaging my children. I’m terrified that they’ll die because we drank from the tap in base housing. Perfect.

I’ll be watching myself and my very young children for signs and symptoms for decades, all because we’re a military family. All because I drank the water at Camp Pendleton. All because I’m just waiting for them to confirm my suspicions about Okinawa.

Want to know if your current or past bases are affected? The DoD has helpfully listed every location with contaminated water!

If our leaders truly, really appreciated the service and sacrifices of military spouses, they would put meaningful fixes in place to correct these dangerous issues.

4. Reduce Military Spouse Unemployment and Underemployed Rates

Military spouses face the reality of chronic underemployment and unemployment. Only 47% of military spouses responding to the 2017 Blue Star Families survey were employed. The overwhelming majority of employed spouses earned less than $20,000 per year.

There are a lot of factors that go into this. Our transient lifestyle makes it hard to advance in professional careers or keep a job longer than three years. Transferring and maintaining multiple professional licenses costs time and money. Federal employment, often touted as the holy grail of military spouse work, requires that applicants jump through hoops and wait, sometimes months, to hear back from prospective jobs.

Beyond the logistics of employment, there are the lifestyle complications related to being a military spouse. We move every three years, on average. We transition between two parent and single parent households regularly.

Child care often eats up the majority of our take-home pay. And that’s when there are openings available. In many locations, securing quality child care requires super advanced application even at the on-base CDC.

Beyond that, our workday availability is almost a necessity to support our spouse and children. The military schedules everything during working hours, from promotion ceremonies to childbirth classes.

You want to support me? Find ways to support my continued employment with changes to how the military works. Longer dwell times, affordable and available child care, expedited and transparent federal hiring practices or making licensure transfers more flexible are great places to start.

Happy Military Spouse Appreciation Day to the women and men who persevere!

Maybe this year the powers that be will give us some meaningful support and change instead of just pretty words.

Read “5 Reasons Why Military Spouses Deserve a Day of Appreciation” for Rachel’s perspective on Military Spouse Appreciation Day.