Military Life News

Military Life News, Commissary Rewards and Military Discounts

Why the CFC Matters

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For service members and federal employees, the Combined Federal Campaign is everywhere right now. But why does it really matter?

Why the CFC Matters

First, a little history about the CFC.

The Combined Federal Campaign (CFC) has been around, in different forms, since 1956. President Dwight Eisenhower created a system to allow federal employees and military personnel to give to charity, without endless requests at work. Presidents through the years have refined and changed the system into what it is today.

Today, the CFC is a once yearly period of time when troops and government workers can donate to charities. This helps to stop year-round charitable donation requests from colleagues or groups. And it allows federal workers to show their support for their favorite causes through their job. On the job giving or donations requests usually isn’t allowed. It can be seen as an “endorsement” by the government.

What is the CFC?

The CFC is a system that helps service members to donate to their favorite charities quickly and easily. It also helps them to track their giving for pay purposes.

First, charities apply to be included in the program. A group that has 501(c)(3) status may apply to be included in either a local or national campaign. For either category, the charity must show their impact and programs.

Then, between September 1 and December 15, 2016 federal employees and service members can give to the group(s) of their choice.

Charities are either local, national or part of a federation. You can give to groups in one or all categories. A local charity works in a designated zone close to your workplace or base. A national charity reaches communities around the country. Charities in a federation are all similar types of groups. For example, a group of charities working in education or health care.

Why the CFC Matters

From left: Master Sgt. Elizabeth Ramos, 412th Force Support Squadron, watches as Brig. Gen. Carl Schaefer, 412th Test Wing commander, and Chief Master Sgt. Todd Simmons, 412th TW command chief, fill out their Combined Federal Campaign donation forms at wing headquarters Oct. 24. Ramos and 1st Lt. Christophe Bangerezako, 412th Medical Support Squadron, are this year’s points of contact. (U.S. Air Force photo by Ethan Wagner)

Not sure where you want your donation to go? You can donate undesignated funds. These will be split evenly between all the charities.

Giving is simple too!

During the CFC period, employees can donate in 3 different ways.

The easiest way is through a payroll deduction. You can give as little as $1 per paycheck over the course of the CFC giving year. Or you can donate as much as you want! The money comes out automatically every pay period and can be divided between different groups.

Another option is to give a one-time cash, check or credit card donation. For specifics about how to donate this way, check with your unit or base representative.

The last way to give is through a recurring credit, debit or ACH donation. Again, check with your unit or base rep for more details.

It’s also easy to track your giving. For payroll deductions, match the deductions taken to the charities on your year-end LES. For credit or debit card donations, make sure that you keep your receipts! If you made a cash donation, you should contact the Finance Department.

Changes are coming to the CFC in 2017.

Retirees will be able to donate through the CFC starting in September 2017. They will be able to give through monthly deductions from their annuity.

Also starting next year, federal employees will be able to volunteer their time and donate. You will be able to give time to selected groups. That time will be monetized and added to the CFC totals.

By opening up these 2 ways to give back, more service members and military retirees will be able to have an impact.

Even those on a tight budget will be able to help others, through the gift of time.

Another change is the GiveBack.org has partnered with the CFC and OPM to modernize the donation system. GiveBack is a charity that helps large groups of people work together for charity. This group will also likely help to integrate the volunteer and retiree donation options into the current CFC system.

The 2016 Combined Federal Campaign is currently underway. Click here to find out more information about donating to the CFC today.

Pro Tips for Military Travel

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Do you have the travel bug?

Traveling as a military service member or family member can be super easy and super cheap. If you know a few pro tips to start.

Pro Tips for Military Travel

What are your military travel tips?

ITT

Every branch of service has a morale or travel office.

Each office has a price sheet with local attractions and package deals to places farther away. You can find deals at other bases, even if you don’t live there.

For example, Travis Air Force Base offers deals and discounts to Napa Valley tours or hotels. In Okinawa, ITT offers complete tour packages to places like South Korea, Tokyo and Thailand.

Pro Tip: Before you go, check with ITT for discounted tickets near your destination.

Space-A

Did you know that the military flies to many prime destinations around the world? Think: Germany, Hawaii, Japan and England.

Most of these flights are open to eligible active duty service members, military dependents and retired personnel. Often there is a small fee or no cost at all.

There are a few catches with Space-A though. First, flights can be canceled at any time and seats fill quickly. Second, seats are filled based on category. So by the time that they get to you, all the seats might be taken. Also, certain destinations are only available from certain departure locations.

Finally, there is a process to sign up and actually get on board. It is time consuming and nothing is guaranteed. Meaning, you could get a Space-A flight to your vacation, but need to pay commercial fare on the way back.

Pro Tip: Check out Space-A flights, but know that nothing in 100% certain. Be ready with back-up plans just in case things fall through or change.

Military Airline Discounts

Southwest: Southwest offers military discounts on flights. However, the exact price is not advertised on their website. To get more information on discounted fares, call: 1-800-I-FLY-SWA.

American: To and from certain locations, American Airlines does offer military fares. Again, these prices are not advertised. Instead, contact them: 800-433-7300 (CONUS English line, available 24/7).

Delta: Like other airlines, Delta offers military fares, but does not advertise specific rates or discounts. To reach reservations/customer service, 24/7 from the United States, call: 800-221-1212.

United: Through Veterans Advantage, United offers a 5% discount. However, Veterans Advantage is a paid plan that opens up discounts at a variety of major U.S. businesses. To check on other offers, call the airline directly.

JetBlue: There are fares available for both official travel and for leisure travel. To find out more or to book, contact the airline.

Pro Tip: Not sure if your airline offers a military fare? Call customer service and check! The worst they can say is no.

Free Bags on Flights

JetBlue, United, Delta, American, and many other airlines all offer free bags to active duty military. The official line is that the service member or dependent family must be traveling on official orders, usually for PCS. However, gate agents will often allow free bags for service members no matter what.

The number of free bags can vary, from 1 to 5 per person. Check with the airline before you fly or be prepared to pay.

Be careful when PCSing OCONUS though! The commercial airline might let you check 5 bags per person, but the Patriot Express or Space-A will limit you to 2 bags or less.

Pro Tip: When checking bags, it never hurts to flash that military ID or bring your active duty spouse with you. And carry a copy of those orders everywhere!

Layover Lounge

Many major U.S. hubs host USO lounges. Seattle, Washington, D.C., and Boston are just a few of the places where troops and families can rack out for a few in between flights.

USO airport lounges are typically staffed 24/7 by volunteers, so be sure to say thank you. Inside, you will find free snacks and drinks, clean bathrooms and a place to recharge your tech toys. Some lounges, like Seattle, have showers, a luggage room and even quiet rooms for sleeping.

If you hold certain credit cards, like AMEX Platinum (fee free for military), you automatically get access to Centurion Lounges (AMEX Platinum only) or can enroll for free in the Priority Pass lounge program. These lounges are a little more upscale, with complimentary alcoholic beverages available.

Pro Tip: Find the USO (outside of security) or see if your credit card comes with airport lounge (inside security) perks.

Vacation Discounts

Delta Vacations: This vacation program offers a set amount off of booked travel based on final package cost. This service lets you bundle flight, hotel, car rental and activities.

Sandals & Beaches: These premium all-inclusive resorts offer a 10% discount to U.S. military personnel. You can combine flights with your hotel stay, too. All stays include all you can eat, drink and play (non-motorized land/water sports). Sandals is adults only. Beaches is family friendly!

Non-inclusive hotel chains, like Hilton and Sheraton, also offer government and military rates. You can often choose “military/government” when booking or call your hotel to check for special discounts.

Pro Tip: Save a bundle when you book all-inclusive or package deals through some providers. You can choose the special rate when booking national hotel chains. No discount mentioned? Ask!

What are your military travel tips? Share them in the comments section!

Expect to See More Cuts to MWR Programs

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Morale, Welfare and Recreation (MWR) is a huge part of military family life. MWR programs in different branches provide much needed support and services to service members and their families.

MWR typically provides staffing and funding for libraries, pools, arts and crafts centers, woodworking shops and auto hobby centers. Other support programs include sports and recreation programs for adults and children. This could include team sports and physical fitness centers on many bases. MWR also funds on-base child development centers (CDC), youth center, teen center and other youth programs.

There will be a $105 million cut in the Army MWR budget in FY 2017.

This is in addition to a separate 23% workforce reduction over 2 years in Army Community Service Centers. These cuts could result in the closure of some facilities and programs. In addition, the budget cuts could result in hours being reduced or fees increased. Army soldiers and their families are the most impacted by these cuts. The cuts took effect on October 1.

The garrison commander will determine how cuts are applied at each base. This means that services and resources impacted will be varied by location. Army families should expect to feel the effects in calendar year 2017.

Army officials, including Lt. Gen Kenneth R. Dahl of Army Installation Command Management, have committed to maintaining CDC funding.

Many Army posts have already been readjusting services and programs for the last 5 years. Some bases have been working to offset costs through investing in programs. The investments ensured that the programs were either profitable or breaking even. Those that did not meet this benchmark were removed or totally revamped.

Outdoor recreation, arts and crafts, and auto skill shops are most likely to be affected by these cuts. Fitness centers could also see reduced hours and staffing.

Volunteers may be able to staff some programs. However, the program structure would need to allow volunteer support. This would allow some services to continue operating, even with the budget cuts.

The cuts should not affect remote or isolated duty stations where comparable services are not available off-base.

Four Army posts should expect to see impacts from the MWR cuts in the near future.

Expect to See More Cuts to MWR Programs

Is your military base impacted by MWR program cuts?

Fort Carson, Colorado:

The 4th Infantry Division will continue to provide staffing coverage for gyms and fitness centers. There will be slight, $1 or less, increase in fees for some programs. The Friday Night Date and Caring Saturday programs are also slated to be reduced. MWR funds both programs. Programs that are costly or have low turn-out are also on the chopping block.

Fort Huachuca, Arizona:

MWR is cutting $500,000. Ammo sales and weapon rentals will stop at the Sportsman’s Center. Skeet and trap shooting, plus Saturday Range 3, will still be available for people who bring their own weapons. There is no word about additional cuts.

Fort Jackson, South Carolina:

This base will see significant cuts in MWR programs and services. One fitness center will completely close. The other 3 centers will be open for 90 hours weekly. The library will be open 5 days instead of 7. One pool will close. MWR funded recreation trips are going to be completely cut. The auto hobby center will be open 4 days instead of 5.

Fort Sill, Oklahoma:

Fort Sill is facing a 25% cut in taxpayer funding. The library’s hours will be reduced. There will also be new fees for the pools, outdoor recreation and special events or programs.

Will other military branches be impacted by MWR cuts?

The budget cuts will also impact joint service bases where Army MWR has the lead. This includes bases that previously had both or all branches providing MWR programs, but switched to have these services provided only by the Army.

The Navy has also made cuts to its MWR programs. Many bases have closed art and craft centers, wood shops and auto centers. There are no additional changes predicted or anticipated this year.

The Marine Corps has not scheduled any cuts to its MWR programs this year. However, the service will continue to look at services and programs.

The Air Force has not released information about potential MWR service cuts.

While these services do not plan to cut services at this time, MWR programs could be changed or removed in the future.

What do you think about the cuts to MWR programs at military bases?

Why I Need a New Best Friend at Every Duty Station

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“It takes a village to raise a child.”

While I wholeheartedly agree with that statement, I also think that we can just drop the whole “to raise a child” bit. For me, it just takes a village. By village, I mean friends. Especially a best friend.

Why I Need a New Best Friend at Every Duty Station

Finding a new best friend at every duty station is tough, but it’s so worth it!

Yes, we all have that one best best friend. The guy or gal who knows all of your secrets since the beginning of time. Who has been with you through the best and worst of times.

As military spouses, we can also benefit from having a best friend at each duty station.

It’s so comforting to have someone that gets you. When your spouse is gone or working late, it’s nice to have someone to explore your new location with. It’s great for trying out all those cutesy cafes, wandering around historic districts and even watching that rom-com for the millionth time.

Finding that best friend over and over and over again is just plain hard though!

First you have to put yourself out there in a serious way. It means meeting the neighbors, mingling with other military spouses in the new unit and trying out new clubs or groups.

Then you have to follow-up. Send texts, become Facebook friends or send out smoke signals. Sometimes, even that isn’t enough.

After you find a friend, then begins the vetting process to determine best friend potential. You need to dig into shared interests, common agreements about life and a joint love of wacky jokes (or whatever your thing might be).

If it’s not a good match, you’re stuck starting over again!

Sometimes, finding a new best friend can seem like climbing Everest: worthwhile, but a battle to accomplish. Just doing this a few times in a lifetime is unbelievably hard. Finding a new best friend every 3 years, or less, can seem nearly insurmountable! It’s almost enough to want to give up on the whole idea of a bestie and just stick to casual acquaintances.

You still have people to hang with, but without all the stress of being joined at the hip. Or having to “replace” your friend when one of you moves.

It’s tough finding a new best friend, yes, but it is so worth it!

Your new best friend could be where you least expect. I’ve found best friends while running, in my spouse’s office and through friends. She or he could be the person right across the street!

Part of finding a new best friend is going to involve putting yourself out there, yes. So many friend-finding opportunities are just part of the military life!

Mandatory fun days, pre-deployment briefs and living on-base are all chances to bump into someone who could be your PERSON.

Before you know it, you are swapping salty military spouse stories, sharing recipes and are inseparable.

There are also other great ways to find your next best friend. Check out a local fitness meet-up, like Stroller Warriors or a cross-fit box.

If you are religious, seek out a church, temple or Bible study in your neck of the woods.

When you come with youngsters, find a preschool support group like MOPS or a gym with a child care co-op program.

For those heading to work, your new pal could be your desk mate or office neighbor.

No matter how you found your new best friend, having one is important.

When the going gets tough, military spouses need someone to rely on. With our spouses gone often, or mostly in-and-out, a best friend becomes the person I rely on.

When I’m sick, she brings me medicine or chicken soup or takes the kids for the afternoon. We swap date night child care duties or have weekly dinner/play dates when the guys are gone. If the car breaks down, I know I have someone to call from the mechanic. I always have a dinner partner when cookie dough a la tube is on the menu too.

It’s why I need to have a best friend at every duty station.

I need a village to help get me through the tough times and to celebrate the best times. My best friends, no matter where I am or where they are, have helped me to survive and thrive in this military life.

How did you find your best friend at your current duty station?

10 Tips for New Commissary Shoppers

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One of the biggest and potentially best, perks of military life is the commissary. Land of less costly staples and often unique foreign foods, the commissary can be a pretty great place.

When you are new to military life, the commissary can be a bit intimidating, especially if you are shopping without your service member. It’s a grocery store, but not exactly. There are some written and unwritten rules that run the commissary.

Here are 10 tips to make your commissary shopping experience a pleasant one.

10 Tips for New Commissary Shoppers

1. Always Bring Singles

The very friendly people bagging your groceries work for tips and tips only. Their take-home pay is based on your generosity and goodwill. If you just have a few bags, drop a buck or two in the wooden box or glass jar. If the bagger has packed many bags, takes them to your car and stows them in the trunk, give a bigger tip please!

2. Clip Coupons

The prices at the commissary are already below the out-in-town shops’ prices, but coupons should not be neglected. Grab the flyers at the front of the store and pull out a few before you shop. Or plan in advance with the Sunday coupon inserts or weekly circulars.

Don’t forget to use your Commissary Rewards Card app. You can digitally clip coupons that way or by visiting Coupons.com.

Even if you use coupons occasionally, you can still score big savings on staples like cereal, diapers and snacks.

3. Military Coupons

Throughout all commissaries are special military-only coupons. These deals are often even better than the manufacturer coupons distributed to the general public. Plus, the discount window tends to be longer, giving you more time to stock up.

4. Pay Day

Service members get paid on the same 2 days each month. Like clockwork. If you value your sanity, avoid shopping at your commissary on those days. Go a few days before or a few days after.

The 1st and the 15th are not days you want to “just run in real quick for some milk.”

5. Case Lot Sales

A few times a year, most commissaries will close a section of their parking lots for case lot sales. A case lot sale is the perfect time to stock up on toilet paper, paper towels, canned goods and bulk snack items for hungry kids. Almost everything is even cheaper than normal and there are often coupons that give you an even bigger price cut.

6. Checkout Etiquette

In civilian grocery stores you just find the register with the shortest line and go there. In the commissary there is one giant line that funnels to the registers. It makes sure that each check-out is not overwhelmed with people and that baggers all get equal amounts of work.

On your first trip, don’t be that person who cuts the line. Join the big queue and bring something to entertain the kids (and you) while you wait.

7. Restocking Day

This might vary slightly from base to base. Generally there is 1 day a week that the whole store is restocked. Find out when this day is and shop on that day. By sticking to restocking day for shopping, you will get fresher veggies and produce. You will also get first grab for new items or popular things that go fast at your commissary.

8. Holiday Feasting

If you like a big turkey for your holiday meal, it is better to scope it out early than to wait until the last minute. Since these big ticket items are considerably less than civilian grocery stores, holiday foods tend to go fast. This means that you might not find a turkey the week of Thanksgiving. It’s better to clear some freezer space in late October than to be caught without one later.

9. Item Requests and Suggestions

Food is changing. Americans are eating very different things than they were even 5 years ago. Just look at the explosion of gluten-free and organic products!

If you want to see something on your commissary shelves, ask. Email the manager. Their contact information is always on the receipt and on the commissary specific website.

You can contact the procurement or department manager too. Often, if a regular distributor carries the product you want, it will show up in stores. Then send a thank you note or email.

There are also comment boxes near the management office of every commissary. If someone went above and beyond, or you liked a particular item, write it down and put it in the box. This is the only way that each store knows what is going right and what needs to be corrected.

10. Time to Shop

This varies based on where you are. Many locations, particularly northern Virginia and southern California, have a huge military retiree population with commissary privileges. This group tends to shop in the late mornings on weekdays. If you are OK with moving a little slower and navigating around motorized carts, this might be a good time for you.

Many families with working parents shop on Saturdays or after church on Sundays. The store will be crowded and full of kids. Also, stores don’t restock on weekends, so this is a prime time for something to run out.

The best way to figure this out is to hit your local commissary on a few different days and times. Find out what works best for your shopping style and stick with it.

What commissary shopping tips do you have for new military spouses? Share them in the comments section.

Why a Surprise Military Homecoming Is an Awful Idea

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Deployment is almost over! The countdown is only a few weeks, days or hours. I am ready. Kind of.

I still need to clean the house, corral the kids, hose off the pets and pick out a stunning outfit for the BIG DAY.

Except now, here he is. The house is dirty. The kids are running amok. The dog just got skunked and I’m wearing sweats. I am so not ready for this military homecoming!

My worst nightmare is a surprise military homecoming.

Maybe because I’m an ultra Type-A planner who likes to be moderately in control at most times. To me a surprise military homecoming just seems like a bad idea.

First, the whole surprise thing. It’s a random time of day and the doorbell rings. There’s a person wearing some sort of uniform standing at my front door. For me, it would be heart-stopping shock. Not joy, shock about the potential despair that might be coming. All because there is a uniformed person on my doorstep, without warning.

Part of deployment is the mental prep and gamification of it. The countdown is front and center on the fridge. In my mind, I’m ready for X day. With a surprise military homecoming, the spouse or family might not be mentally ready.

Why a Surprise Military Homecoming Is an Awful Idea

A military homecoming doesn’t need to be a surprise to be special for your family.

Along with the mental prep work to welcome a service member home, comes some deep selfishness.

We have been apart for goodness knows how long, and my bed has been empty. The children have not seen their father in forever it seems. And we need that moment of just us-ness.

But a surprise military homecoming takes away that intimacy. They take away the “us-ness” of the moment by bringing other people into the mix.

It’s sheer logistics. Someone else will see him first, be next to him first, drive him first and arrange his first food.

Call me selfish, but the only humans I want to share those firsts with are my children. The deployment has been a build-up to the moment my spouse steps off the bus, plane or out of formation. I need the closure of that very first kiss.

Beyond just the “first” moments, let’s talk about the whole planning aspect of these surprise military homecoming shenanigans.

The service member has to contact someone at home to arrange everything. Someone has to be there to get her. She has to have food and something to drink, plus provide a change of clothes. The props have to be set up in advance, ready to go. Plus, someone has to move the spouse and kids into the correct position at the proper time.

That is a LOT of work. Chances are that the TV crew members don’t help out every person who wants to pull off one of these surprise military homecomings.

Last, but not least, let’s talk about the lies involved with a surprise military homecoming.

The building blocks of marriage are truth and trust.

After months apart, the service member has decided to keep a HUGE secret from his or her spouse: the time and date of return. Not only has she just not mentioned it, the service member has also likely actively engaged in deception to conceal the return window.

Reintegration following deployments is challenging enough without starting off with a giant lie. Failing to be truthful about when you are returning can be extremely hurtful.

Not to mention, the weeks leading up to reunions are unbelievably busy: cleaning, haircuts, notes to school, arranging child care, more cleaning, meal prep and getting children ready to be back in a 2-parent household again.

Just showing up can put a seriously huge (but happy) wrench into a lot of this prep time. Plus, there might be last-minute “distraction” adventures that families have planned to just get through the final few weeks or days.

I know I hit Disneyland an awful lot the month that a year-long deployment was winding down. What if my husband had picked a spontaneous Disney day to “surprise” me? He’d have been locked out while I rode Space Mountain, that’s what.

So, by all means, go right ahead and do your supposed to be fun and emotional surprise military homecoming stuff.

But please, before you get deep into plans, remember that not everyone likes surprises. Some families on the homefront need the non-surprise reunion to wrap their brains around the whole situation.

Trust me, even without the surprise aspect, every military homecoming is full of love.

Now it’s your turn: How do you feel about a surprise military homecoming?

Our Favorite Feel-Good Commissary Stories

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The commissary stocks your favorite foods. From fresh deli meats to moist birthday cakes, the commissary carries nearly everything a military family needs to bring the flavors of home to their homes.

These stores are so much more than just the items on their shelves. It’s the people we meet and personal connections we make that keep us going back time and again. We asked our readers to share their favorite feel-good commissary stories with us. Here’s what they said.

Our Favorite Feel-Good Commissary Stories

Always On

When the power went out at the air base in Incirlik, Turkey, this July, all military personnel and their families were left in the dark. The commissary still had full power, thanks to an independent generator. In the middle of the political turmoil, families were unable to charge their cell phones or use the internet to connect with loved ones back home.

So the commissary set out chairs, power cords and shared the store’s Wi-Fi with the community. Service members and families could swing in for pantry staples and get in touch with their families stateside. Plus, the commissary was the only open building with air conditioning!

Paying It Forward

Our budgets are often tight, even with a consistent paycheck coming in. It can make buying essentials, like milk or diapers, challenging for many military families.

Near Fort Bliss in Texas, the local Fox affiliate stopped into the base commissary to surprise military families by picking up their tabs. At the register, they stopped several customers and offered to pay for everything in their shopping carts. Just as a way of saying “Thank you for your service.”

One young mother explained a little bit more about her tight budget. The Fox team sent her back into the commissary to load her cart with diapers and milk for the kids. Then they paid for the whole thing!

Littlest Helpers

It’s the little things that make commissary trips or any shopping trip with kids easier.

Lizann, a military spouse, told me about a special connection between their son and one grocery bagger. On every grocery trip, this military spouse makes sure to be in this bagger’s line. This bagger remembers their little boy and lets him help her bag their groceries. She always greets him by name and often gives him a sticker.

It’s a great reward for helping his parents!

Special Attention

A military spouse on a specific diet in a new place can be a struggle. When one military spouse needed to skip the rice on her sushi, the kind people at the sushi counter were more than ready to help her.

They created special sashimi plates for her, with just fish and no rice. They also shared the nutritional labels for all of their products with her.

And every time she goes in, the sushi staff chats with her about her day!

Food Requests

Speaking of special diets, it can be costly to adhere to an exclusionary meal plan. One spouse was paying very high prices for non-dairy items out in town. And she was having to make multiple trips to different stores to track down specific products, Meg told me.

While grabbing some items in the dairy section one day, she bumped into the section manager. She shared her frustration about the lack of non-dairy yogurt with him.

The manager checked with the suppliers to see if the product was available for stocking. It was!

Less than 2 weeks later, her specially requested non-dairy item was on the shelves! Plus, the department started adding even more dairy-free products.

Touch of Home

On a 6-month tour in Italy, having a commissary with American food items helped one veteran feel more connected to home.

On weekends, he and his friends would go to the commissary and load up on their favorites. Then they would cook and eat together. It helped these troops to feel more connected to home, especially when stationed overseas.

For families with small children, it is also important to have the same foods no matter where they live. Being able to open the pantry and make macaroni and cheese while living in Japan is comforting.

The commissary also makes it easier to take new favorites with you. The diversity and depth of their international foods aisle makes it simpler to create authentic Spanish, Japanese or German meals while living in Kansas.

Recognition

Murphy’s Law struck one military spouse less than 24 hours after her husband left for his deployment.

While buying essentials at the commissary, she discovered that her military dependent ID card was missing. She searched high and low: in the car, in her purse and all around the store. Even retracing her steps in the parking lot. Nothing.

And her groceries were still sitting in the cart. Her face was burning with embarrassment!

Luckily, the commissary manager saw her predicament.

“I know you. You shop here all the time. You’re good!”

With groceries purchased, she finally found the missing ID in the parking lot of her children’s school! And never forgot this act of kindness.

Do you have a feel-good commissary story? Share it in the comments section.

Can Military Spouses Have It All?

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What is “having it all?”

For me, having it all means having a job in my profession with my spouse also working in his field. It means a decent house in a safe neighborhood and reliable child care. Having it all means the ability to take a vacation every year. Having it all means that my marriage, family life, professional life and personal interests are able to work together.

Do You Think Working Military Spouses Can Have It All?

What do you think? Can military spouses have it all?

With the recent release of their study, The Force Behind the Force, the Institute for Veterans and Military Families (IVMF) lays out some troubling statistics.

Essentially, this study tells us what military spouses already know: we are underemployed and unemployed in staggering numbers as an almost direct result of our spouse’s military service.

In his opinion, 2012 Military Spouse of the Year Jeremy Hilton dissects the results and reaches the conclusion that military spouses cannot “have it all” in the traditional work/life/family balance. And he’s not wrong.

The “powers that be” offer solutions: volunteer, work for the government or work remotely. Which is great, for those lucky few who have the skills in the markets that allow those kinds of flexible jobs.

In my time as a military spouse, I have sacrificed almost a decade of professional teaching experience so that my husband can honorably serve this country. Since receiving my master’s degree in 2009, I have taught in a school district for 2 years. I know that my personal job prospects suffer for each year that I am out of the classroom. Even with writing an education blog and being active in professional learning networks online, I am moving out of the loop.

My salary expectations are suffering too. My peers, with similar degrees earned at similar times, are several steps ahead of me. This way of paying teachers is not unlike the military and government method: years of experience and education combine to indicate a salary. With only 2 years on the books, I’m earning at least 4 years – 4 steps – below my peers.

When I have voiced concerns about this in online forums, some military spouses have been dismissive and down right critical.

After all, I knew what I was getting into. I should have expected to shell out hundreds or thousands of dollars every few years to get a new license or maintain a current license.

If not, I should be prepared to walk away from an expensive education and a profession that I am passionate about. Or find a different passion or cobble together some other wage earning position(s). No slack should be cut. I should be happy with what I get, even if it is scraps compared to what my professional peers rate, these critical voices tell me.

Here’s the thing: I have seen how I could have it all.

I had it all for a very brief window. I had my dream job in my dream school. My spouse also had an assignment he loved. We were both being paid competitive wages, with the opportunity to advance. We had reliable and affordable child care.

And then we got PCS orders.

Suddenly, my career was at square one. Child care involved endless waiting lists and it was just easier to stay at home with my child. I gave in. I stopped fighting. I told myself that I couldn’t have it all.

Then we moved again. So I started again.

Now we are expecting another child, which is amazing, except that it means that my career will once again take a back seat. If I wasn’t a military spouse, I would have been in one or two districts over the last 6 years. I would have earned tenure on the faculty. I would have earned Family Medical Leave Allowance. I would have been able to bank sick days for years to compensate for the post-birth time off.

So, can military spouses have it all?

In short, yes. Sometimes.

When all the stars align and the pieces of the puzzles fall into place, for brief periods of time, military spouses can have it all. I have been to that promised land and I have been kicked out again.

Most of the time, military spouses will probably not have it all.

By the time we line up the child care and the best job, orders will be imminent. Or another child will be on the way. Or deployment and training will pop up again.

And we will be back at square one: new location, no job, a few kids and gaps in our paid job experience that no amount of volunteering or blogging will ever hope to fill.

We will be chasing our professional licenses, hunting on the job boards and calling child care places to see if there is any hope of an opening.

We become part of the statistics for unemployed or underemployed military spouses.

What do you think? Can military spouses have it all?

Why These 5 Military Bases Are Our Favorites

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Sure, every military base or duty station has its perks, but some military bases just stand head and shoulders above the rest.

Why These 5 Military Bases Are Our Favorites

Which military bases are your favorites?

These 5 military bases, for a variety of reasons, are the best bases that our writers have ever lived at.

Presidio of Monterey, California

If you love going to the beach in the fall, then this is the place for you! It’s jeans and sweater weather almost all of the time, with the gorgeous Pacific Ocean just steps away. On the beach, you can stand and watch the fog roll in, see it swirl around you and blanket the coastal town in mist.

Beyond the scenery, freshly picked produce from local farms is available everywhere you look! Plus, with the world famous Pebble Beach Golf Course close by, it’s easy to hit the links or check out the annual Pro-Am tournament.

For military spouses, volunteer opportunities, on base and off, abound. The opportunity to study alongside your spouse is also available, as space allows at the Defense Language Institute. Some spouses have been able to study a second (or third!) language while in Monterey. Since the Presidio is a joint services installation, being here allows everyone to bust out of their service-centric bubbles and create even more amazing friendships!

San Diego, California

From Camp Pendleton up north to Miramar in the east, with Coronado holding it down in the south, this whole region is a fan favorite for military bases.

And what’s not to love? Beautiful beaches, with low waves for the little ones and big surf for the brave. Nearly perfect weather year-round, sunny skies daily and rarely a cloud to be seen. The flowers are blooming all the time and the ocean breeze cools off even those rare scorching hot days.

For foodies, this is the place to be: with Mexican, Asian and soul food (plus so much more) available around the clock.

Animals lovers rejoice! The world famous San Diego Zoo just celebrated its centennial and is hosting fun events through the end of 2016. Its sister park, the Wild Animal Park in Escondido, lets visitors get up-close and personal to the animals on safari-style tours.

Out east, and slightly north, lies Temecula Valley. This wine region is producing reds, whites and sparklings that will please even the most discerning palates.

With military bases all over this area, you are never at a loss for resources, health care or community connections. For families, couples or those flying solo, SoCal is the place to be!

Stuttgart, Germany

If you are looking for castles, forests and international travel opportunities, Stuttgart might just be your military base.

Located close to the German/French border, Stuttgart is in the heart of Europe. By rail, road or air, you can access all that this continent has to offer easily. From lunch in France to shopping in the Black Forest or buying a car in Sweden, all of these adventures and more can be yours!

As you travel, don’t neglect the places closer to home. Stuttgart features beautiful castles, stunning parks and festivals year-round. Their Oktoberfest is the second largest volksfest worldwide, behind Munich.

Near the holiday season, the Christmas market is open for business with artisan crafts and local cheer. When you factor in museums and the opera, Stuttgart is a cultural mecca!

JEB Little Creek-Fort Story, Virginia

Located in the heart of Hampton Roads, an epicenter of East Coast naval operations, JEB Little Creek is combined with Fort Story as a joint service base for the Navy and Army.

Little Creek is easy to get to and close to so much. From beautiful beaches to the history of Virginia, this region is sure to be a winner for you! Plus, you can watch the ships head into and out of the port.

Nature enthusiasts can enjoy hiking, biking and running trails along the coast or in one of many local parks. For history buffs, this region offers museums on local, national and military history.

Let’s not forget the food! From fresh from the boat seafood to boiled peanuts to down home Southern cooking, you can find it all here.

Within driving distance, you can access the Carolinas and the Mid-Atlantic. A trip up the coast gets you to Jamestown, where the first English colonists settled. Military families should head inland for Civil and Revolutionary War battle sites.

Washington, D.C.

The nation’s capital, and one of the busiest military hubs in the United States, Washington, D.C., is a great place to live like a local!

D.C. is a great place to pick up running, biking or walking. Just picture it: ending your run at the Lincoln Memorial as the sun rises behind the U.S. Capitol. Perfection!

D.C. is the perfect place to explore like a tourist. Almost all the museums are free and you can visit national landmarks, like the White House on your weekends.

You can also see live music, comedy and explore tons of different cuisine. Comedy and music shows are hugely popular in the U Street corridor. Ethiopian, Vietnamese and El Salvadorian foods are fan favorites with the locals.

What are your favorite military bases? Tell us in the comments!

Online Communication Keeps Military Families Connected

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When my husband deployed, I thanked my lucky stars that we were living in the 21st century. My beloved was often just a keyboard and computer screen away.

Online Communication Keeps Military Couples Connected

Online communication allows military couples to stay connected during times of separation.

I immediately thought about my grandparents: continents away during World War II and communicating through unreliable snail mail. Deployments were a lot longer then, too. The troops were gone for years sometimes, with very little communication to the folks back home.

Today, we have an app for that!

There are more ways to connect than you can imagine and military families have found or tried many of them. From video chats to instant messaging services, from email to virtual reading programs, there is something out there for everyone. Most of these online communication services can be accessed right from a smartphone or laptop, anywhere in the world!

The benefits of online communication really boil down to just one thing: connections.

Every time a unit deploys, that means that many military families are operating without one parent for months at a time. The parent at home takes on twice the work with less down time. Suddenly, one person is in charge instead of two.

For that parent, being able to reach out to their deployed spouse can help to make solo parenting that much easier. When a child has a great success, it can be shared and cheered together. Or when a child has a not-so-great moment, the parents can plan together on how to handle it and show a united front.

For military children, online communication keeps them connected to their deployed parent.

When there is a big win or a bad day, a child can immediately email Mom or Dad to share their feelings. Or they can message them. Or use a video call.

Just seeing their parent’s face keeps those channels of communication open and operational. When a child relies on one parent for so long, it could be easy to see the other as not a part of the game. This can make it harder for everyone when the deployment is finally over.

With quality online communication, both parents are on the team at the same time. They are making joint decisions and working together as a family to handle every situation.

That online connection can start even before or at birth. With the heavy deployment cycle of the last 15 years, many service members have been “present” for the birth of a child via video. Sharing something so precious, from so far away, is priceless.

While a parent deploys, families often are also far from grandparents, aunts and uncles. Virtual connections via online communication can help here too. Many military children grow up seeing Grandma and Grandpa via video chat or through shared online photo albums. Having these avenues open, during deployments or not, is vital to keeping extended families connected across the miles. Online communication provides networks and resources to draw on, no matter where military families are located.

Even small things, like the locations of documents or tools, can be almost instantly shared through online messages or emails. So when the car inevitably breaks down or the washer needs a part, searching for the insurance or manuals won’t add another stressor to the situation.

Ultimately, the benefits of online communication come down to one main thing: connections. Yes, there are thousands of little intangibles that make up the idea. The soccer game live streamed to the middle of the Pacific. Christmas morning presents via Skype. Seeing a family vacation from across the world. All of these little moments that are shared together online create connections through communication.

For military families, keeping their connections alive during deployment is the biggest benefit of all.

How has online communication benefited your military family during a deployment? Share your story in the comments section.