Military Life News

Military Life News, Commissary Rewards and Military Discounts

Would You Visit a Medical Clinic at Your Commissary?

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The Navy is in the planning stages of a pilot program that would put corpsmen-led clinics in commissaries around the country.

The 38th surgeon general of the Navy, Vice Adm. C. Forrest Faison III discussed this idea of revamping Navy medicine to mimic walk-in clinics at large retailers at the conference of the Association of Military Surgeons of the United States last month.

“We’re in the early stages of discussing a pilot program that would develop corpsmen-led clinics that might be in our commissaries or in our exchanges, connected by telemedicine to doctors at the hospital,” Faison said in an interview with the San Diego Union-Tribune. “So if you’re a patient, while you’re in the commissary you can get your health-care needs met by a corpsman, and that corpsman is getting the opportunity to keep his skills up.

“More importantly, because he’s the guy there, he’s developing the confidence he’s going to need to save lives on the battlefield — but in a structured way that we’re providing good, safe health care using telemedicine links to experienced physicians in the rear.”

The Navy is planning to have the first medical clinic at a commissary in Jacksonville, Fl. The details of this clinic including if patients would be required to have an appointment haven’t been announced yet. The Navy also hasn’t announced what type of medical care would be offered at this clinic. DeCA hasn’t said if its organization is in support or even interested in this pilot program.

Yet, despite the lack of specifics, I’m strongly in favor of this pilot program. I hope this concept is implemented at Jacksonville and then replicated at military installations around the country.

Here are 4 situations when I would have jumped at the convenience of a medical clinic at my commissary.

The Overseas Medical Screening Process

I was overjoyed when we found out that the Navy was relocating us to Japan. But before I could get excited about learning the traditions of a tea ceremony, I had to first work my way (and I say work because it felt like a full-time job) through the system of the overseas medical screening process. This process is very detailed and may require multiple trips to your medical clinic.

Imagine if the medical clinic at the commissary had an overseas screening day where you could come in with your medical history and vaccination records and then get your overseas medical screening efficiently completed. Once you’re done with that short appointment, you could stroll into the commissary and pick up some sushi for lunch.

Flu Shots for the Entire Family

Every fall it’s the same thing. Time to make your appointment to get your flu shot at your medical clinic. It would be super convenient have a flu shot walk-in clinic at a medical clinic at the commissary. I could take my children and we could get our flu shots before doing our weekly grocery shopping.

The 0730 Fight for a Parking Space

Finding a parking space at a medical clinic can be…well exhausting. There never seems to be enough parking spaces for the patients on any given day.

The commissary’s parking lot is spacious. Let’s take advantage of that ample parking by moving a clinic to it.

Immediate Medical Care That Doesn’t Involve Broken Bones

As a mom, I know when my child has an ear infection.

I know when she has pink eye.

I know when she has strep throat.

In all of these cases, she needs immediate medical care but our military treatment facility may not have any same-day appointments available so I take her to the emergency room. I would love to see a medical clinic in the commissary that operates as an urgent care clinic.

Right now, we don’t have the details of the Navy’s proposal to put a medical clinic in a commissary. But I think there are a lot of potential benefits. I would use it if it was available to my family. Would you?

What do you think of this proposal to put a medical clinic in a commissary?

Commissaries Will Offer 400 Private Label Items Starting in May

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For the first time in its history, private label items will be found in your military commissary.

Commissary shoppers know (and often complain) that generic products aren’t available at the commissary.

If you want ketchup, you buy Heinz.

If you want oatmeal, you buy Quaker Oats.

If you want cola, you buy Coca-Cola or Pepsi.

The same quality for a lower price product often referred to as a generic brand, like the Best Value brand found at Walmart stores or the Market Pantry brand in Target stores, isn’t an option at your commissary. There isn’t a store brand for DeCA.

Soon that will change.

The Defense Commissary Agency selected MDV SpartanNash LLC to be its first private label supplier.

“We are excited that DeCA has selected us to support this important initiative, and to provide commissaries with private label products for the first time in their history,” said Dennis Eidson, SpartanNash CEO and Chairman of the Board in a press release.

“This partnership will provide military families with quality options and the opportunity to stretch their food budget. Many of our active duty and veterans are on a limited income, and their military benefit provides savings which are key to meeting their families’ food and household needs. Patriotism is one of our core values, and we are extremely proud to serve our nation’s service members, their families, and military partners around the world,” Eidson said in the press release.

Starting in May, commissary shoppers will see private label items on the shelves in their stores. DeCA officials said the plan is to introduce an initial assortment of 400 items in commissaries worldwide in May 2017. The amount of private label products will be gradually increased with the goal of 1,000 available at commissaries by the end of 2017.

DeCA’s director and CEO Joseph H. Jeu said he is excited to bring private label products to military families.

“They are smart, savvy shoppers who know that private label products are cost-effective alternatives to national brands. We’re excited to help them save more at our commissaries,” he said in a press release.

DeCA reported that 60% of commissary patrons said they would be interested in a DeCA private label.

“Our customers have been asking for private label for a long time,” Jeu said.

Customers aren’t the only ones asking for private label products. Congress had a hand in this decision too.

The 2016 National Defense Authorization Act (NDAA) nudged DeCA to explore the option of private label products. DeCA has been researching ways to keep the commissaries open with less federal funding. The private label brand is only option out of many that DeCA is exploring in the next year.

What do you think of DeCA’s decision to have a private label brand? Would you buy private label products if they were available at your commissary?

Why Your Family Should Make Family Goals for 2017

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“Don’t count the time, make the time count.”

As a military spouse, I often feel like I’m constantly counting time. I count down the months until we move to Hawaii. I count down the weeks until my husband comes home from deployment. I count down the minutes until bedtime.

When I’m counting down the time instead of making the time count, I miss the highlights of life. I’m stuck in the day-to-day task list. Did we make any memories as a family in the past year? Or were we so focused on homework, ballet recitals and work deadlines that we didn’t take the time to enjoy life?

Making a family goal for the new year helps me slow down and remember what’s most important in my life.

Here are 12 goals that your family may want to embrace in the new year. These 12 ideas are a starting point for your family’s discussion about choosing a goal for 2017. Don’t try to do all 12 goals. Pick one that you can do together throughout the 12 months.

Note: Whatever goal your family makes, write down your goal in the present tense. This goal isn’t a hope or a wish. With a realistic action plan, your family can achieve your goal.  

In 2017 my family is an active family. Everyone in my house benefits from fresh air, sunshine and physical activity. We know that. Yet we are tempted to stay inside and watch a movie when our bodies really need a bike ride.

In this goal, schedule a weekly family outdoor activity.

In 2017 my family is a curious family. When we moved to Mississippi 2 years ago, I made a bucket list of the local attractions that I wanted to visit.

Can you guess how many we’ve crossed off the list?

Exactly 3.

I tend to return to familiar places instead of exploring new ones. I need to push myself to be curious and go outside my comfort zone.

In this goal, plan a weekly curious day where your family finds a new park, visits a local museum or eats dinner at a new restaurant.

In 2017 my family is a face-to-face family. Limiting screen time is like eating vegetables in my house. We know we should do it, but we don’t do it as much as we probably should.

In this goal, turn school nights into no-screens nights. You will be surprised how easy a blanket policy like this can work for small children.

In 2017 my family is an “outside the box” family. After a long day, making a homemade meal is the last thing I want to do.

I want to order pizza. For the second time this week.

But with proper meal planning, we can eat healthy and balanced meals nightly. And honestly eating healthy doesn’t have to be time consuming. Check out these quick and healthy recipes from DeCA’s dietitian.

In this goal, set aside an afternoon for meal planning. Depending on your child’s age, he or she may be able to help with meal prep.

In 2017 my family is a responsible family. I once had a deployment goal of teaching my kids to be responsible for their own belongings. This meant hanging up their backpacks when they came home from school, putting their shoes by the front door and clearing their dishes when they finished eating breakfast. Rocket science, right? Teaching responsibility for personal items is no easy task. But with constant and consistent reminders, my kids will do it.

In this goal, set a nightly 7-minute timer where every family member picks up and puts away their personal items that may be scattered throughout the house.

In 2017 my family is a green family. Making smart environmental choices isn’t difficult. For my family, it means bringing reusable grocery bags to the commissary, turning off the lights when we leave a room and purchasing food items with less packaging. Many habits that are good for the environment are also good for your bank account.

In this goal, pick one non-negotiable green policy that your family will embrace in 2017.

In 2017 my family is a patriotic family. My children know that their father serves in the military. But do they know that their grandpa and uncle were both in the Army? Probably not. I want my children to value military service and to be grateful to veterans for their service and sacrifice.

In this goal, volunteer with a veterans organization or simply teach your children to tell a veteran “thank you” when they meet one.

In 2017 my family is a less-is-more family. My house is crowded and it’s not with people. It stuffed with stuff.

In this goal, commit to making thoughtful purchases in the new year. For example, stick to your shopping list at the store and wait 24 hours before buying an item online. Those late-night impulsive purchases are the worst.

In 2017 my family is a giving family. We know that it’s better to give than to receive, but how often do we give? Giving is on my radar during the high-demand holiday season but I forget about it during the rest of year.

In this goal, your family volunteers regularly with a nonprofit organization.

Pro-tip: You can make a donation to your favorite charity through the Combined Federal Campaign.

In 2017 my family is a frugal family. Spending less and saving more money is a constant goal of mine. Do you feel the same way? Like all habits, spending less isn’t going to happen naturally. I need to put forth the effort to examine our spending habits and make a spending plan. It isn’t fun but it’s so important.

In this goal, sit down with your spouse to make a spending plan for the next year. Break it down into weekly spending plans to help you achieve your financial goals in the new year.

Pro-tip: Sign up for MilitaryShoppers newsletter to have tips on saving money, military discounts and commissary specials delivered to your inbox.

In 2017 my family is a reading family. It’s only 20 minutes. But sometimes prioritizing those 20 minutes of nightly reading is more like 17 minutes of nagging to read and 3 minutes of actual reading.

In this goal, set a reminder on your phone to “alert” you when it’s time to read together before bed.

In 2017 my family is a “no” family. Does anyone else feel overwhelmed and over-scheduled? Our weekends are filled with birthday parties and military social events. I like the weekends to be a time to recharge our batteries, not drain them completely.

I have the control to do that and the power is found in one small word: no. I plan to practice saying “no thank you” a lot more in 2017.

In this goal, thoughtfully consider one event or activity that you can decline to attend every month.

Does your family make goals for the new year? What is your family goal for 2017?

GAO Report Says DoD Lacks Data to Make Cuts to Commissaries

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Remember that Department of Defense report that said budget neutrality isn’t a vital option for commissaries?

Well that report isn’t the end of this discussion.

More likely that report is just the beginning of an ongoing discussion about the feasibility of self-sufficient commissaries.

The Government Accountability Office (GAO) recently released a report titled “Plan and Additional Information Needed on Cost Savings and Metrics for DoD Efforts to Achieve Budget Neutrality.” In this report GAO evaluated the DoD’s report and found that it lacked specific data to support its stance that budget neutrality isn’t feasible for commissaries.

“GAO’s analysis found that DoD’s report fully addresses three of the seven mandated elements and partially addresses the remaining four. Although DOD’s report discusses the seven mandated elements, GAO found that including additional information would have made the report more consistent with relevant generally accepted research standards and would have made the report more useful to decision makers,” the GAO report stated.

More useful to decision makers? Wait…what?

Let’s take a step back into the recent history of reports on cost-saving measures for the commissaries.

As commissary shoppers, we know that that DeCA operates the commissaries. Prices at the commissaries are product cost plus a 5 percent surcharge. In fiscal year 2015, DeCA’s annual sales for its commissaries were approximately $5.5 billion. DeCA received $1.3 billion in appropriated funds in fiscal year 2015 to operate the commissaries.

Those appropriated funds are currently under the microscope of the defense department.

The National Defense Authorization Act for Fiscal Year 2016 “mandated DoD to provide a comprehensive plan to achieve ‘budget neutrality,’ which DoD interpreted as ending the use of appropriated funding for commissaries and the military exchange system, by October 1, 2018,” as explained in the recent GAO report.

This mandate has caused a lot of head scratching and number crunching for those at both DoD and DeCA.

The Boston Consulting Group was contracted to conduct 2 separate studies that may lead to cost-saving measures. In February, DoD established the Defense Resale Business Optimization Board. This board is working to help implement reforms within and among the commissary and exchange systems.

Then DoD released its report saying budget neutrality will be difficult, if not, impossible. GAO then reviewed that DoD report as it was directed to in last year’s defense budget. That’s what lead to this report and GAO’s recommendation that “DoD provide information to Congress to support its conclusion about budget neutrality; develop a plan for achieving alternative reductions to appropriations; and identify specific metrics for customer satisfaction, product quality, and savings.”

“DoD did not provide a plan to achieve budget neutrality by October 2018 as mandated because according to the report, DoD cannot achieve budget neutrality without reducing savings to patrons or other benefits provided by commissaries and exchanges.”

“For example, the report stated that drastic changes, such as store closures and price increases, would have to be implemented if DOD were required to achieve budget neutrality. However, DOD did not provide additional information about potential steps to reach budget neutrality, such as cost estimates and assumptions, or include specific details about trade-offs, constraints and limitations to achieving budget neutrality such as reductions in benefits,” the GAO report said.

“Instead of providing a plan, DOD estimated a $2 billion reduction over a 5-year period, which would fall short of achieving budget neutrality by about $5 billion. DOD officials told us the cost savings amount was an arbitrary estimate, and that therefore DOD did not develop details on steps it would take to achieve the $2 billion in savings. DOD officials could not explain the assumptions, methodology, data, specific time frames or DOD efforts that would lead to the $2 billion in savings.”

In case you’re wondering why DoD didn’t conduct these types of detailed analysis in its initial report, DoD experts, who were interviewed by GAO investigators for this report, pointed to time constraints as their reason for the lack of specifics.

“According to DoD officials, for some efforts that are already being considered, DoD officials told us that they did not include some information in the report to support their conclusions because they have not had time to verify the information,” the GAO report said.

Here’s another important nugget of information: DoD concurs with GAO’s recommendations.

Now that we know that the decision makers aka Congress lack the information needed to make decisions about changes to the commissaries, what’s the next step?

I have a strong sense we’ll be reading another federal report in the near future.

What do you think of this GAO’s report saying that the DoD’s report on cost-saving measures for the commissaries was incomplete?

Repay Your Enlistment Bonus? No Way!

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Enlistment bonuses are the pot of gold in military life. Not everyone gets them. If your solider is offered one, count yourself lucky and take it. Don’t ask any questions. Just take that money and use it to pay off your debts or buy a house.

That’s the opinion among many service members when it comes to an enlistment bonus. It’s free money. Take it or leave it. But it would be smarter to take the enlistment bonus.

Repay Your Enlistment Bonus? No Way!

Enlistment bonuses are the pot of gold. You are lucky if you find one.

That’s why when the Los Angeles Times reported that nearly 10,000 soldiers with the California Guard were ordered to repay their enlistment bonuses, many like myself were thinking “repay? no way.”

Here’s what happened.

During the no-end-in-sight wars in Afghanistan and Iraq in the mid-2000s, the Defense Department struggled to retain service members and meet recruiting numbers. To combat this shortfall, cash incentives, similar to a sign-on bonus in the civilian sector, were given to service members.

But not every service member. Only soldiers with certain assignments – for example, intelligence, civil affairs and some noncommissioned officer posts – were supposed to get bonuses, according to the Los Angeles Times’ article.

But an investigation, which was triggered by a whistleblower, found that California Guard officials mismanaged their enlistment bonus funds. They gave enlistment bonuses to soldiers who didn’t qualify for them.

This investigation lead to an audit of the enlistment bonuses given to California Guard soldiers. This audit lead to nearly 10,000 soldiers being notified that they needed to pay back their bonuses. They didn’t have a choice. They were ordered to pay back this money.

It wasn’t their fault that this money was mismanaged. They didn’t do anything wrong. Yet, they were ordered to pay back their enlistment bonuses.

Many did. They refinanced their homes or took a second job so that they could pay back the thousands that they now owed the federal government.

Many tried to fight the order to repay. They filed appeals and got nowhere until the Los Angeles Times’ article went viral.

Only then did something happened for these veterans.

Rep. Duncan Hunter called the repayment demand a “boneheaded” move. President Obama ordered the Defense Department to “speed up a review of its attempt to recoup enlistment bonuses from National Guard members and to ensure that the Pentagon doesn’t ‘nickel and dime‘ them,” according to the Washington Times.

Defense Secretary Ash Carter ordered the Pentagon to halt its attempts to reclaim these enlistment bonus. He also promised to resolve all the cases by July 1, 2017.

“While some soldiers knew or should have known they were ineligible for benefits they were claiming, many others did not,” Carter said in a statement.

What happens next?

More investigating.

More number-crunching.

More hand-wringing.

Do I believe that thousands of soldiers will be allowed to keep their enlistment bonuses that on paper they didn’t earn because of the fraudulent actions of a few?

Honestly I don’t.

Enlistment bonuses are the pot of gold. You are lucky if you find one.

What happens if you stumble upon one by mistake?

You don’t get to keep it.

Now it’s your turn: What do you think of this enlistment bonus scandal and repayment order to thousands of California Guard soldiers?

4 Tips for Finding Military Discounts

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Military discounts save military spouses and service members money. Who doesn’t want to save money? Everyone. We are all looking for a deal or a discount as a way to spend a little less when dining or shopping off base.

But let’s say that you recently moved to a new location. When you find yourself living in a new city, you are often unaware of which businesses offer military discounts.

What is a savvy money-saving military spouse to do?

Here are 4 tips for finding military discounts at your new location, wherever that may be.

4 Tips for Finding Military Discounts

Are you wondering which local restaurants offer a military discount?

Download military discounts apps on your smartphone.

Downloading a military discount app on your smartphone is the easiest way to find the local restaurants and stores that offer military discounts. There are several different apps available for military families.

I use the SCOUT military discount app. This app, which is free on both Google Play and iOS, is a comprehensive app for identifying military discounts near me. When using the app, I can easily see which businesses offer a discount through the map view.

For example, if I’m shopping at the outlet mall, I can see the red flags on the map and know which retail stores offer a military discount. (Thank you Express!) I can also see how much the discount is.

I like that I can easily add a military discount to the SCOUT military discount app. It takes less than 5 minutes and I feel like I’m helping out other military spouses when I add in my military discount tip. They really need to know about the local coffee shop that offers free coffee for military service members in uniform on Tuesdays. Don’t you agree?

Ask about military discounts in your local spouses Facebook group.

When you’re new to a city, you have a lot of questions. You are looking for the best Chinese take-out place and most affordable hairdresser who will get your color just right.

Where do you turn to for these answers? It’s your local spouses Facebook group.

Every military installation has an “unofficial” spouses Facebook group where you can post your questions and other military spouses will answer it. When you’re asking for recommendations for a vet for your pet or best romantic restaurant to celebrate your anniversary, don’t forget to ask if those businesses offer military discounts.

Follow websites that showcase military discounts.

Information about military discounts is always within your fingertips. Websites, like MilitaryShoppers, are dedicated to sharing military discounts with you. The information is out there, so take advantage of it. Sign up for the MilitaryShoppers newsletter or like us on Facebook so that you know everything there is to know about military discounts. Click here to sign up for the MilitaryShoppers newsletter today!

Ask for a military discount at your favorite restaurants and stores.

For years I simply forgot to ask for a military discount. Don’t be like me.

Whenever you are paying, make it a habit to sweetly ask “do you offer a military discount?” and have your military ID card ready to show the cashier. It never hurts to ask.

What are your tips for finding military discounts in your new city? Share them in the comments section.

Your SKILCRAFT Purchases Create Jobs for People Who Are Blind

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Meaningful change doesn’t happen overnight. Long-term improvements that empower communities do not start and end with a single person.

Achieving tangible outcomes from concentrated efforts takes dedication, collaboration and compassion. When these three factors merge, long-term positive change for our country and our citizens happens. That’s what happened when National Industries for the Blind (NIB), the federal government and the Defense Commissary Agency (DeCA) joined together for the mutual benefits of manufacturing SKILCRAFT® products and making them available in military commissaries and exchanges.

In 1938, President Franklin D. Roosevelt (FDR) signed legislation requiring federal government agencies to purchase certain products produced by people who are blind. In signing this law, FDR confirmed his belief that Americans with disabilities could produce high-quality, competitively priced products for federal and military customers.

During World War II, people who were blind working at NIB associated nonprofit agencies manufactured mops, brooms, mailbags and pillowcases for service members. In the 1950s, military commissaries began selling SKILCRAFT dishcloths, doormats and clothespin bags. The SKILCRAFT logo lets shoppers know that these high-quality products are made by people who are blind.

Today, NIB and its associated agencies produce more than 5,000 SKILCRAFT products. NIB and its nationwide network of associated agencies are the largest employer for people who are blind in the United States. Last year, NIB and its associated agencies generated nearly 500 new jobs for people who are blind, including veterans who sustained injuries in Afghanistan and Iraq. Today, more than 5,600 people who are blind are employed in NIB’s network.

The successful partnership between NIB and DeCA is an example of how #InclusionWorks for both people who are blind and the organizations that hire them to produce high-quality products.

The hashtag #InclusionWorks is this year’s theme for National Disability Employment Awareness Month (NDEAM), “a nationwide campaign celebrating the skills and talents workers with disabilities bring to our workplaces,” according to the U.S. Department of Labor’s Office of Disability Employment Policy. This federal observance, first recognized by Congress in 1945, is held every October.

“By fostering a culture that embraces individual differences, including disabilities, businesses profit by having a wider variety of tools to confront challenges,” said Jennifer Sheehy, deputy assistant secretary of labor for disability employment policy. “Our nation’s most successful companies proudly make inclusion a core value. They know that inclusion works. It works for workers, it works for employers, it works for opportunity, and it works for innovation.”

Here’s how #InclusionWorks for SKILCRAFT products sold at military commissaries.

NIB recognizes that meaningful employment leads to more independent lives for people who are blind. Despite continued gains in employment, seven out of 10 working-age Americans who are blind are not employed. This statistic fuels NIB’s mission to create, sustain and improve employment opportunities for people who are blind.

NIB and its associated nonprofit agencies:

  • Employ more than 5,600 people who are blind across the country
  • Pay an average hourly rate of $10.92
  • Offer rehabilitative services to more than 128,000 people who are blind
  • Operate 151 Base Supply Center stores on military and federal government facilities
  • Produce 7,000+ different products, including 5,000+ SKILCRAFT products

Each of us, as commissary shoppers, have the opportunity to create jobs for people who are blind by purchasing these high-quality SKILCRAFT products. When we buy sponges, mops, kitchen gadgets, plastic flatware and brooms, we play a role in how #InclusionWorks in our country.

Your purchases lead to opportunities.

Opportunities lead to jobs.

Jobs lead to independence.

When you purchase SKILCRAFT products at your local commissary, you help to create jobs for people who are blind.

That’s how #InclusionWorks in America.

For more information about SKILCRAFT products or NIB, visit http://NIB.org/ShopSKILCRAFT.

What I Do When I’m Feeling Lost and Alone

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Silent tears ran down my cheeks. I tried to look straight ahead and listen politely, but my mind was racing with a million questions.

The nurse turned to me and said “sweetie, are you OK?”

I nodded. I wasn’t OK. I wasn’t fine. Inside I was freaking out. Outside I was trying hard to appear calm.

“How often do I need to change the wound dressing?” I asked the nurse.

I was sitting in a surgeon’s outpatient room. I had a minor surgery to remove a cyst near my collarbone. As part of my follow-up care for proper healing and to prevent infection, I needed to have the wound dressing changed twice a day.

“Can I do it myself?” I asked the nurse.

“Of course not. Just ask your husband to do it.” she said.

My husband, of course. That would be the logical solution. But my husband wasn’t at home and wouldn’t be at home that night. He was gone for a week. A military assignment that he couldn’t miss and now I felt lost and alone.

“In that case, ask your mom or your sister,” the nurse said.

I shook my head.

“A close friend?” she offered.

Who in my neighborhood would be the person that I could ask to change the dressings for my minor wound? See even as I type this question, it seems like such a minor thing. But to me at that moment it wasn’t a minor thing.

It was a huge inconvenience. I’m a private person and now I needed to tell an acquaintance that I had a cyst on my collarbone and oh, by the way, can you change my dressings for it?

So embarrassing.

It was a level of friendship that I wasn’t emotionally prepared to climb into with one of my neighbors when I stepped into the surgeon’s office that morning.

I felt so alone. Really truly alone.

Have you ever felt lonely in military life? Do you ever feel so alone even though you are surrounded by the military spouse community?

What I Do When I'm Feeling Lost and Alone

What do you do when you feeling lost and alone?

Feeling lonely is normal. Feeling a little lost and feeling so alone happens to even the most outgoing military spouses. It happens to the perky and positive ones too.

It’s an emotion that can slap you across the face when you realize that you need someone to help you. That’s when I feel alone. I feel alone even though I know I can call any other military spouses in my social circle at any time.

But I know I can’t feel alone for too long. Here’s what I do when I’m feeling alone in military life.

I allow myself to be humble.

In the case of the cyst removal post-surgery care, I need physical help. It wasn’t a pleasant task. It wasn’t like asking a friend out for lunch or coffee. It was a basic medical care kind of request. And there was nothing that this person was going to get out of helping me. No benefit whatsoever.

It’s humbling to ask for help in these kinds of circumstances. You realize all the things that you do independently and take for granted. Depending on the kindness of strangers (even if they are also military spouses) can be a tough pill to swallow.

But in these moments, I allow myself to be humble. I remind myself that it’s perfectly normal to ask for help. In fact, the nurse told me I needed this help. I couldn’t do it myself. I couldn’t be Wonder Woman. I couldn’t be amazingly-awesome-independent military spouse.

In this case, I needed to be a humble, swallow-your-pride military spouse.

I allow myself to forgive.

My immediate reaction to these types of situations is anger toward my husband. Stupid Navy. Stupid deployment. Of course he isn’t here to help me. Of course not. It starts with a seed of frustration, branches off into anger and then flowers with bitter fruit of resentment.

Being mad at my husband for a situation that he can’t control doesn’t bring me any closer to a solution. My anger doesn’t change the fact that I need help and I feel alone.

During these times of loneliness, I allow myself to forgive my husband. Clearly it’s not his mistake. It’s not his error. But I need to tell myself that I forgive him for being gone during this time. Forgiveness brings me a step closer to acceptance. Once I have acceptance that I can’t change his deployment I can focus on what I can control in this situation.

I allow myself to be vulnerable.

When I reflect on periods of loneliness in my life, I find that my feelings of being alone were related to my desire to appear strong instead of weak to others.

I didn’t want others to know that I had a cyst. I didn’t want others to know that I needed help. I worried about what others would think of me instead of allowing myself to be me. I wasn’t allowing myself to be vulnerable.

Being vulnerable is part of friendship. If you don’t allow yourself to be vulnerable, your friendship won’t deepen. Trust can’t happen without secrets. Empathy can’t happen without mistakes. Loyalty can’t happen without alliances.

When I allow myself to be vulnerable with a potential friend I am letting this person know that I value her as a friend. I’m ready to trust her with my personal baggage. I’m ready to let her in.

I’m ready to ask her to change my wound dressing.

Finally I don’t feel so alone anymore.

Do you ever feel lonely in military life? What do you do in those moments when you feel so alone? Tell us in the comments section.

3 Things You Need to Know About Military Coupons

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I often think that grocery store shoppers divide into 2 types of people: those who have a coupon for every single item in their shopping carts and those who shrug their shoulders when asked for their coupons.

When you’re standing in line behind the person who has a coupon for every bottle of shampoo, bag of potato chips and container of baby formula, it is impressive to see their total savings. These commissary shoppers are super organized. They know how to get additional savings using military coupons.

What the rest of us – the ones without the coupons – need to know is that we can all be savvy military coupon users at our commissaries. Here’s how to do it.

3 Things You Need to Know About Military Coupons

Using Military Coupons Has Never Been Easier

Gone are the days when you bought your local Sunday newspaper for the stacks of coupons. Put down your scissors, sister. You won’t be needing that.

Today’s commissary shoppers can find military coupons online with user-friendly websites like coupons.com. Within minutes, you can digitally clip and print military coupons to use during your weekly grocery trip. Here’s what DeCA says about coupons from the internet:

Commissaries gladly accept Internet or home-printed coupons provided they meet the following requirements: the coupons must have a typical barcode and Product Identification Number (PIN) or GS1 DataBar. A Dot Scan Barcode may appear below the expiration date, but is only required if stated on the coupon, e.g., “Do not accept without a Dot Scan Barcode below the expiration date.” Internet coupons cannot be accepted for free products, however, “Buy One Get One Free” coupons are acceptable if they meet all other requirements.

To print these military coupons correctly you may need to download the site’s printer software. Once you do that, you will be ready to print your coupons on a regular basis.

Military coupons are also available through the commissary rewards card. I recommend downloading the commissary rewards card app on your smartphone after you register your card. I use these military coupons like other people use Target’s Cartwheel app.

Near the end of my shopping trip (once my cart is full, but before I’ve gotten in line) I use the free Wi-Fi available at my commissary to open the commissary rewards card app. Then I clip the military coupons for items that I’ve already placed in my shopping cart. When the cashier asks for my military ID card, I also hand her my commissary rewards card.

Commissary rewards cards are free. You can pick one up from your cashier that next time you are at the commissary.

If you really miss the sound of scissors slicing through coupon ads, you can always pick up a military coupons ad section at your commissary. These military coupons can be used only at commissaries. Look for these coupon packets either at your commissary’s front lobby (near the shopping baskets) or ask your bagger for one. My bagger will often slip one in my shopping bag.

You Won’t See Double or Triple Coupons Days at the Commissaries

The commissaries aren’t able to have promotions that increase the value of your military coupons. Here is the reason, according to DeCA’s website:

Commercial stores who offer these types of promotions get paid by the coupon issuer only for the face value of a coupon, and have to absorb the costs of “doubling” or “tripling” coupon face value in their pricing and profit structure.

Because commissaries are required by law to sell goods at prices set only high enough to cover the cost of those goods, commissaries make no profit from which to pay the costs associated with “double” coupon promotions.

Additionally, DeCA cannot use funds provided for the operation of commissaries to support such promotions, because law strictly prescribes the uses of these funds, and “promotional support” is not among the allowable uses of these funds.

Then I read this on DeCA’s military coupon policy webpage:

Commissaries do occasionally offer a different type of “double coupon” promotion than described above. For these promotions, manufacturers or other coupon issuers agree that commissaries may accept more than one coupon on the purchase of an item, and usually supply large numbers of coupons to patrons in the commissary in support of such promotions. These “double coupon” promotions involve doubling the number of coupons accepted on the purchase of an item, but DO NOT involve doubling (or otherwise increasing) the face value of a coupon.

I haven’t seen a double coupon promotion offered at my commissary, so I’m very curious about these promotions. If anyone has seen a double coupon promotion at their commissary, tell us how it worked in the comments section.

You Can Use Military Coupons at OCONUS Commissaries

Military spouses living overseas can redeem military coupons at their commissaries. In fact you can use an expired coupon up to 6 months after its expiration date.

My mom thought that this expired coupon policy was delightful when I was living in Okinawa, Japan. She would send me her expired coupons and I would gladly use them every time I shopped at the commissary.

What questions do you have about military coupons? Tell us in the comments section.

Dear DeCA, Please Expand the Click2Go Program

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If I had the option of going inside my commissary or shopping online for groceries with curbside pickup, I would opt for the convenience of the curbside pickup. Every. Single. Time.

That’s why when the Defense Commissary Agency (DeCA) announced the pilot program for Click2Go, the commissary’s online shopping and curbside pickup program, I was doing my happy dance inside my kitchen. Sure, DeCA was doing the pilot program at only 3 locations – Fort Lee, Va., Travis Air Force Base, Calif. and Offutt Air Force Base, Neb., but I was convinced that my commissary at Fort Detrick, Md., would be next in line.

Turns out my happy dance was a little premature.

Currently DeCA doesn’t have any plans to expand the Click2Go program, but the agency also doesn’t have any plans to eliminate the program.

I feel like it’s one of those military moments of “It is what it is” logic. It’s good for the people stationed at those 3 locations that offer Click2Go. But for the rest of us, don’t hold your breath.

Yet this optimistic commissary shopper isn’t giving up on her hope for Click2Go. I believe in the success of the Click2Go program and maybe all DeCA needs is a little nudge of positive reinforcement. Well here it is.

3 Reasons Why DeCA Should Consider Expanding the Click2Go Program

Convenience for Commissary Shoppers

I truly want to shop at the commissary, but sometimes pesky excuses get between me and its sliding doors.

Here’s an example of how these mental roadblocks go down inside my head:

I need to go to the commissary but…

  • I don’t have enough time to go and pick up my daughter from school.
  • My baby is napping. I really don’t want to take him out of his car seat.
  • It’s raining.
  • It’s snowing.
  • I don’t have cash to tip the baggers.
  • It’s payday. That place is going to be a zoo.

If I had the option of Click2Go, I would jump over those mental roadblocks with this simple phrase –

I’ll use Click2Go.

Boom. Mic drop. Done. No more excuses not to go the commissary.

Competition with Other Curbside Pickup Options

Click2Go isn’t the only curbside pickup game in town. You, like me, most likely have other curbside pickup options in your city. Many national grocery stores offer this service and many military spouses are taking advantage of this convenience.

That’s money that should be going to the commissary. But it isn’t. Why? People will pay for convenience. If the Click2Go program was expanded to more commissaries, more patrons could have the best of whole worlds –convenience combined with the competitive pricing offered at the commissary.

Listening Earns Loyalty

Every time I see a military spouse posting on Facebook that she’s “in love with the curbside pickup” at another store, it’s a sign that DeCA needs to expand its Click2Go program.

Customers are looking for a curbside pickup option, no matter, where they shop. When MilitaryShoppers asked commissary patrons what types of changes they would like to see at their commissary, they said that they want to see the Click2Go program expanded to more commissaries.

Making changes based on customer feedback earns customer loyalty. We know that the Department of Defense and DeCA are these massive government agencies and 9 times out of 10 we feel like our opinions don’t matter to the leadership. But it doesn’t have to be that way.

Wouldn’t it be awesome if DeCA embraced this trend in convenient shopping options and expanded its Click2Go program? They already developed a pilot program. The pilot program is working. The pilot program is continuing at those 3 locations.

Now we just need to see it at 284 locations. Is that too much to ask?

Have you used DeCA’s Click2Go services? Would you use this service if it was available at your commissary? Learn more about Click2Go here.