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Do I Want My Daughters to Join the Army? It’s Complicated

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by Eric Gardner, Guest Contributor

Our lives as military spouses are filled with countless decisions. As a fourth-generation veteran I understand I have a tendency to overthink certain areas of life.

One of them being – will my children wear the uniform in the future?

Now I’ve still got a bit before anything happens. My oldest is gracing the halls of middle school this year. However, I know full well how fast time can pass and before I know it my beautiful little girls will be empowered, driven young women.

Will I want my daughters to join the military of the future? To be honest the verdict is still out.

Now before this gets taken out of context, let me explain. There are some terrific life lessons that can be gained through military service.

The first one that comes to mind is making friends quickly. All military brats and active duty service members have that quality which has been honed through countless PCSes. A social grace that allows them to blend into any group and find connections that might be lost in other civilian professions.

Another lesson of military service is you learn the importance of family. Our families are the only constant we often have. Regardless of where the military takes you, your family being by your side can make your military installation feel like home.

And last but not least is developing a unique empathy that few outside the service can match. It’s one thing to see the sights of a host nation or port of call. It’s another to make friends with the locals and see the world from their point of view.

Do I Want My Daughters to Join the Army? It's Complicated

As I plot and plan for the future there is one thing I know I have no control over – my daughter’s decision to join the Army.

I sincerely hope that my wife and I are good stewards of the impression the Army makes on our girls. Not that everything is easy. Far from it, we want to ensure that our kids see that military life is passionate, full of adventure and challenging. The later part being what makes the journey worthwhile.

Now before you think I’ve got my dad blinders on, let me say just a little about the methodology to this train of thought. The one thing that I can’t stop is time. Whether it’s after high school or college or somewhere in-between my kiddos are going to have to take their own steps out into society. Their unique signature on the world will only be limited or enhanced by their experiences and imagination.

When I graduated from college to join the Army, there was a tremendous amount of uncertainty. I considered myself lucky in that while my peers felt a similar apprehension about the unknown at their new jobs, they had suffered additional stress of finding their place of employment in their field of study. My classmates weren’t exactly sure how long their positions would be available at their new offices.

I, on the other hand, had a guaranteed eight years of job security.

I think we can all agree that everything has tradeoffs. I know for a fact that my parents — my mother specifically —  didn’t enjoy my time at Ranger School. So many things could have gone wrong, from a simple failed exercise to a catastrophic accident. I’m fairly certain my guaranteed employment wasn’t at the top of either of my parents’ thoughts during the years of airborne operations at Fort Bragg.

As I began to excel as a soldier, I could see the joy my successes brought to them. Some of their excitement was a validation that their sacrifices during my childhood allowed me to positively stand out and that my future held so many possibilities.

The military isn’t forever. Even if you do 30 years there are still many chapters of our lives to write. As a starting point, the Army alone has 150 career paths. Finding a passion with so many choices is a high probability.

Even it’s only for a few years, there is so much to gain from military service.

Promotions can be expected. Equality is something everyone believes in. You get paid vacation from day one. You and your family have access to health care and you have the opportunity to see the world.

Now there will always be disadvantages and they do carry a lot of weight. There are the long hours, often hazardous duty accompanying most career fields, the stressors placed on the family, and the nomadic lifestyle is oftentimes hard to adjust to.

Yet as I plot and plan for the future there is one thing I know I will have no control over – my daughter’s decision.

To say the military isn’t for everyone is putting it mildly. A 1% sampling of the population volunteering to serve has so many demands placed on it that you need to want to be there. As with all paths of life there will be highs and lows, however the added element of extreme risk can produce some very hard days.

This is why the jury is still out. My wife and I won’t promote or discourage the military lifestyle. Our girls have a brief glimpse of what service life is like from being Army brats.

As a former brat and veteran, I know how little I understood going in. Yet that was OK because I wanted to be there. It’s not necessary that I need my children to do this.

I want them to be vested in their passions.

I want them to excel in whatever profession they choose.

And above all else I want them to be excited about their future.

While I’ve said it’s their decision I have to admit, having them be part of five consecutive generations of military members would make me smile. However, wanting them to thrive in a career they are passionate about is what would make me most proud.

Do you want your children to follow in your footsteps and join the Army? Why or why not?

Eric Gardner was raised in a military family and lived around the world. Following in his father's footsteps, he joined the U.S. Army as an Infantry Officer. Eric Gardner was raised in a military family and lived around the world. Following in his father’s footsteps, he joined the U.S. Army as an Infantry Officer. Since the end of his wartime service he has shifted gears and is now a stay-at-home father. In his role as an active duty Army spouse, he has become an author. As the creator of the XIII Legion Series he has enjoyed great success, and enjoys meeting other entrepreneurial spouses as well as fellow authors. You can see more from Eric Gardner at his Facebook page: www.facebook.com/thirteenthlegion.series, and http://www.facebook.com/XIIILGN or follow him via Twitter @13thLegion.

Veterans Annoyed with Office Depot’s Logo on New Veteran ID Card

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After waiting nearly three years from the time the government approved a veteran ID card, the ID cards are finally getting into the hands of veterans.

The new veteran ID card identifies veterans for the purpose of receiving military discounts.

Some companies require proof that a person is a veteran in order to receive a discount. For those that did not retire from the military, they do not have a way to prove they are veterans unless they carry their separation papers known as DD-214 discharge papers.

Who carries their DD-214 around with them? A veteran ID card is a much easier way to prove that you are a veteran at a restaurant.

Many people are happy that a veteran ID card is available, but they are not happy that the Office Depot logo is on the back. The reason their logo is on the back is because they are printing the cards.

While the government approved the production of a veteran ID card, the government did not provide funding to pay for the ID cards.

That’s when Office Depot stepped up.

It makes sense from a business standpoint to get some free advertising out of the huge cost. The company is not only paying to produce the veteran ID cards, but they are also covering the cost of mailing them. They have agreed to do so until the end of fiscal year 2020. That will add up to a huge investment for Office Depot.

Veterans Annoyed with Office Depot's Logo on New Veteran ID Card

Who carries their DD-214 around with them? A veteran ID card is a much easier way to prove that you are a veteran at a restaurant.

The veteran ID card is highly requested. When they initially launched the website to apply for the veteran ID card, the site crashed. After adjustments were made, Vets.gov was able to get the program started again.

As of mid May, nearly 99,000 applications for the veteran ID card had been received and over 26,000 had been approved. More than 10,000 people were mailed a veteran ID card before the end of the month.

A veteran ID card sounds great, but many veterans are annoyed about the Office Depot logo on the back. They feel like it cheapens the card and makes it look unprofessional.

The back of the card has the Veterans Crisis Line phone number, the Office Depot logo and a tagline that reads: “Saluting you today and every day. Thanks for taking care of business.”

The back of the new Veteran ID card includes the Office Depot company logo. Photo credit: Military.com

When I first saw the veteran ID card, I thought the Office Depot logo on the back made the card look unofficial. It’s nothing like a standard issued military ID. Perhaps that’s on purpose.

The veteran ID card is only to show proof that a person is a veteran in order to receive military discounts.

The veteran ID card cannot be used as an official government ID card.

You cannot use it to access a military base and it does not replace the VA’s ID card that veterans use to identify themselves at VA clinics.

You also cannot use it to get through security at an airport since it is not an official government ID card.

The veteran ID card is specifically to be used for public and some government situations in lieu of carrying the DD-214 paperwork when proof of service is required. It is only available to veterans that were discharged as honorable or general.

Veterans interested in obtaining a veteran ID card must prove that they are former service members to receive a physical card. You can find out more information and apply for a veteran ID card online at Vets.gov.

While some people might not like having the Office Depot logo on the back, I’m sure they like that the card is free. Sometimes you get what you pay for.

What do you think of having Office Depot’s logo on the back of the new veteran ID card?

Serving in the Army Is My Family’s Calling

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by Eric Gardner, Guest Contributor

The term family business has a menagerie of feelings and definitions depending upon who you ask. I prefer the term “calling” instead of “business,” since it casts a truer light upon my unique family past.

In the broad categories which define roles associated in our military culture I’ve held many of them.

Service member.

Military spouse.

Army brat.

I’ve worn these roles with pride. With more than 40 years of life vested in this unique and sometimes challenging community, I can say unequivocally I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.

Service is a very dear ideal in my family. While I can trace my roots back to the American Revolution, I have had a constant family member in active service through WWI, WWII, Japan’s Occupation, the Cold War, and the Global War on Terror. My wife is also a third generation military member.

This family calling has given us a shared outlook and understanding on what is truly important in life.

Serving in the Army Is My Family's Calling

Did you follow your father and join the Army?

Even with such a rich family history of military service my parents never forced a career in the Army upon me. Growing up in the ’80s I was a huge fan of the “G.I. Joe” cartoon and shows like “The A-Team” and “MacGyver.” While other children my age saw these larger than life personas as too fantastic to be true, I knew the exact opposite.

As a child I could say that I’d met the proverbial steely eyes, barrel chested freedom fighter on several occasions. In “G.I. Joe,” Duke, Lady Jay and Roadblock would display the moral courage to take a stand against something they felt was wrong. I could see the same exhibition of character by walking into my father’s office on any given day and witness the towering soldiers doing the exact same thing.

This introduction into my family calling was accented more when units would hold their organizational days. These family-oriented events always showcased the tools of the trade to loved ones so they could get a better understanding of what their service member did.

Imagine seeing every Hollywood prop in real life and understanding that the soldier standing in front of you was just as awesome as any character that was on the big screen; it clearly made a lasting impression.

Before my elementary school years were over I understood how camouflage worked, possessed a loose understanding of how many different weapon systems our service men and women were tasked to employ and a firm respect for the work that each of them did.

Serving in the Army Is My Family's Calling

I never viewed my unique exposure to the Army as manipulation to join its ranks. Instead this insider information allowed me to make the best decision I could about my future.

I have wonderful memories of wearing face paint, dressed in my pint-sized fatigues and patrolling our military quarters with my sister in tow on a mission to find a lost G.I. Joe somewhere in the hedge. A smile always comes to mind when I think back to having my father introduce me to the challenges of obstacle courses and learned how stations like the gut buster and the weaver vexed the men and women under his command. Whether it was climbing on Humvees and tanks or checking out the static displays of the utility and attack helicopters, I saw the world of the military as a constant adventure.

On the flip side there were times when the military lifestyle was negative. The moves, training and deployments, and constantly reinventing yourself are challenges we can all relate to. However, with each of these, one thing made it all possible; family. My mother and father always put us first — within reason of course.

Even in the tough times we understood that friends and homes may change but our family would always be there.

When I went off to college my future world was a blank canvas to explore. Even with an endless array of life options, the most fulfilling was in my R.O.T.C. program which lead to my commissioning in the Army as an infantry officer. The same branch my great grandfather was in during WWI and my father was during his 30-year career. I never viewed the unique exposure to the Army as some sort of manipulation to join. Instead it allowed me to make the best decision I could about my future.

Serving in the Army Is My Family's Calling

My parents never forced a career in the Army upon me.

My tour of duty as a service member with the Army lasted eight and a half years. As I transitioned to the role of spouse my love for the military way of life didn’t change. With my own children now seeing the nonstop adventure this lifestyle holds they can make their own decisions when they enter the workforce to see if the military is right for them.

Regardless of their choice they will know that within their family were men and women who were willing to risk everything to ensure they would be afforded the same chance at a wonderful future they had been given.

Serving in the Army Is My Family's Calling

I can trace my roots back to the American Revolution, I have had a constant family member in active service through WWI, WWII, Japan’s Occupation, the Cold War, and the Global War on Terror. My wife is also a third generation military member.

Did you follow your parent and join the Army or other branch of service? Tell us your family of military service story in the comments section.

Eric Gardner was raised in a military family and lived around the world. Following in his father's footsteps, he joined the U.S. Army as an Infantry Officer. Eric Gardner was raised in a military family and lived around the world. Following in his father’s footsteps, he joined the U.S. Army as an Infantry Officer. Since the end of his wartime service he has shifted gears and is now a stay-at-home father. In his role as an active duty Army spouse, he has become an author. As the creator of the XIII Legion Series he has enjoyed great success, and enjoys meeting other entrepreneurial spouses as well as fellow authors. You can see more from Eric Gardner at his Facebook page: www.facebook.com/thirteenthlegion.series, and http://www.facebook.com/XIIILGN or follow him via Twitter @13thLegion.

What I Love About Being a Stay-At-Home-Dad

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by Eric Gardner, guest contributor

I have had many titles placed upon me in my life, but the one I cherish the most is stay-at-home-dad.

What I Love About Being a Stay-At-Home-Dad

There will always be enormous events in life, however the really important ones happen in between these milestones.

The role of a domestic engineer is a critical position that does not reward you in the traditional sense of a paycheck so some people struggle to define its value. As someone who benefited from a stay-at-home parent and now as I fill the role myself, I understand the profoundly positive impact this position can play in the health of a military family.

My wife and I, like many others, have always placed a very high value on our family. It’s a key consideration for us as we look forward with her military career.

As military families we can’t always stack the deck in our favor with PCS timelines or operational tempos but my wife and I have always tried to do the best we can.

As our family grew with the arrival of our oldest that core consideration of family value was put to the test.

As a dual-military couple we understood the time constraints our careers placed on us. With combat deployments on the rise at the time and both of us assigned to high op-tempo units we were concerned with how that could affect our family. We had seen many couples struggle with this and talked through countless scenarios. In the end the only one that fit us was my departure from the service to stay at home.

I won’t pretend there wasn’t a significant learning curve.

The transition from leading troops in combat to being unable to get my daughter into a diaper without it being a significant emotional event was an adjustment.

You cannot help but be humbled and laugh at life when your child pees through her diaper and onto your dress slacks as you stand in a receiving line for your wife’s change of command. Your once formidable persona as a ground combatant commander is shattered by the undeniable challenges that raising children will bring.

Yet with all difficult tasks come wondrous rewards. I know how fortunate I am to be able to say, I have been present at the birth of both of my children. I have been to every birthday, every holiday meal (because I am making them) and every milestone so far in their lives. Not out of luck but because I am supposed to be.

The role of a stay-at-home parent requires sacrifice, however it also yields immeasurable rewards.

I will admit that my wife got the first word status. I guess it is more fun to say “Momma” than “Daddy” in the beginning. She shares a bond with our girls I will never have – after all she is their mother.

I have been a Girl Scout troop leader and was given the unique chance to add a male perspective to my troop. Our Thinking Day observance was one such instance. As we told the unique histories and cultural information about Italy, my Girl Scouts showed off bedazzled gladiator weapons they made for the event.

I have been a spokesman for school programming, a room parent, hosted coffees and attended the military spouse events in Washington, D.C. As many of the other stay-at-home parents know there is never a shortage of areas to help out in.

Being a stay-at-home dad has allowed me the opportunity to never take myself too seriously. There will always be enormous events in life, however the really important ones happen in between these milestones. The loss of a tooth, learning to ride a bike, doing the first cartwheel, or getting a perfect score on a test.

Life happens in a few blinks of an eye.

Being afforded the opportunity to be with my girls daily lets me see them grow into beautiful ladies and allows me the chance to bolster their confidence so they can chase any dream they have.

Eric Gardner was raised in a military family and lived around the world. Following in his father’s footsteps, he joined the U.S. Army as an Infantry Officer. Since the end of his wartime service he has shifted gears and is now a stay-at-home father. In his role as an active duty Army spouse, he has become an author. As the creator of the XIII Legion Series he has enjoyed great success, and enjoys meeting other entrepreneurial spouses as well as fellow authors. You can see more from Eric Gardner at his Facebook page: www.facebook.com/thirteenthlegion.series, and http://www.facebook.com/XIIILGN or follow him via Twitter @13thLegion.

My Life as a Unicorn in the Military Community

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by Eric Gardner, Guest Contributor

My Life as a Male Military Spouse

Are you a male military spouse? Do you feel like a unicorn in your military community?

How do I feel about being a male military spouse (aka a unicorn)? That’s a complex question – being unique isn’t always a good thing.

Yet now in these later years, to put it simply, I love it.

As a military family we are thrilled that my wife is nearing her 20-year mark.  We’ve been all over the world. We’ve had our share of bumps and bruises along the way. And the saying “it’s not just a job, it’s an adventure” has been our philosophy toward the unique situations the Army loves to send our way.

My wife and I never set out to change the social structure of the military.

Our non-traditional family dynamic is what we felt suited our needs best. My transition from active duty officer to stay-at-home parent was one we discussed in depth. This important role of stay-at-home parent and active duty Army spouse was one we thought complemented our strengths and weaknesses as a couple.

While our friends and families accepted our decision, the military has been a little slower to embrace this type of dynamic.  In large part the traditional role of male military spouse was occupied by joint service members.  The dual military couple is a classification, which both service members and spouses of the late 90s and early 2000s could categorically fit into as an already well-established social slot.  I knew that role well.

Serving over 8 years in the Army, my presence at the social functions as a “military spouse” was novel and typically dismissed because of the reality that I would have little time outside of my normal duties as an infantry officer.

Everyone understood and appreciated my desire to get to know my wife’s unit spouses but they never expected me to devote any real energy to their network.

My life as a male military spouse went into uncharted territory when I departed from service to take on the role of stay-at-home parent with our daughters.

Looking back it was a comical transition.  We attended several closed door discussions where both my wife and I were counseled (separately, of course) on the proper path our growing family should take. In the opinion of my leadership at the time I should stay in and my wife should get out.  After the disbelief of having such a discussion we decided to stay true to our course.

Our next assignment was a challenging one.  As new parents we soon began to see the reactions to our decision to take on less traditional roles.  I encountered many inquisitive gazes. I answered tons of questions about “how I enjoyed spending time with my daughter.”  I didn’t try to alter their views, but instead delivered a smile and a well-wish or two.

I was fortunate that the commander’s spouse was new to the Army and didn’t have any of the preconceived notions about the Family Readiness Group (FRG) structure.  To her, I was a welcomed addition to the unit and someone who brought a unique inner dynamics to the group.

It was the first time that my desire to fix a problem paid off.

I was fortunate that while the wives all had differing opinions, mine was also seen as beneficial because of how I interpreted different challenges the FRG was facing.

The initial experience became the norm for my interactions with unit spouse organizations.  As we continued to PCS I was constantly put in the role of sanity checker of the group.  Comically this is not even a title my wife allows me to even remotely occupy in our family however among a collection of like-minded military spouses a uniquely different voice can often shed fresh insight onto routine operations.

I don’t mean to imply that every instance of entering this traditionally female-dominated environment was easy and fulfilling.

I have had my share of exclusions from play dates because of perceptions.  Along with the unsteady looks at the playground when I would be there with my daughter.

My status as a male military spouse has excluded me from several events, but it has also allowed me to speak openly when my fellow spouses feel compelled to describe their problems.

After all you can’t blame a guy if he just comes right out and states the problem; right?

Just kidding guys, they can blame you.

Today’s military has changed since the late 90s and early 2000s. The modern family dynamics are ever evolving and the network of wives, husbands, partners and friends helping their service members succeed are stronger than ever before.

I love my role as a male military spouse and I am thankful for the opportunities and relationships it has afforded me to experience.

Are you a male military spouse? Do you feel like a unicorn? Share  your perspective with us.

Eric Gardner was raised in a military family and lived around the world. Following in his father’s footsteps, he joined the U.S. Army as an Infantry Officer. Since the end of his wartime service he has shifted gears and is now a stay-at-home father. In his role as an active duty Army spouse, he has become an author. As the creator of the XIII Legion Series he has enjoyed great success, and enjoys meeting other entrepreneurial spouses as well as fellow authors . You can see more from Eric Gardner at his Facebook page: www.facebook.com/thirteenthlegion.series, and http://www.facebook.com/XIIILGN or follow him via Twitter @13thLegion.

How to Use a VA Home Loan to Build Your Custom Home

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On any given Saturday, you’ll find me enthralled by the latest episode of a home-improvement show. I marvel at the shiny bathroom tile or the hand-scraped hardwood floors. It’s hard not to image what it would be like to build my dream home.

Would it be somewhere in California overlooking the ocean?

A Rocky Mountain hideaway in Colorado?

Or maybe a red-brick colonial in the suburbs of D.C.?

And I’m pretty sure I’m not the only one who has spent hours imagining it all, right down to the drawer pulls and carpet colors.

But did you know that financing home construction is vastly different from a traditional mortgage? Did you know your VA benefits can help you make your dream home a reality?

Here’s the skinny on how to use your VA home loan benefits to build your custom home:

New Construction Financing 101

Unless you have enough money to pay a builder cash for materials and labor, it’s likely you’ll need to take out a loan. New construction is typically financed with a construction loan during the building process, then converted to a traditional mortgage once building is complete.

Some real estate developers and builders will pay for the construction phase so that approved homeowners only need to secure a traditional mortgage. Often this means you’re building a house in a planned community and can customize your home from a variety of plans and options offered by the builder.

However, if you want an entirely custom home (from your own blueprints) or if you want to build outside of a planned community, you may need to apply for your own construction loan.

How to Use a VA Loan for Your Custom Built Home

There was a time when VA construction loans were readily available, but thanks to many of the issues that tanked the U.S. housing market in recent years, a straight VA construction loan may be hard to find.

During the construction loan process, the bank will review your building plans and release funds, as needed, for each phase of the building process. Generally, a homeowner will pay the interest on a construction loan during the building process, though interest is accrued only on the money that has been released to the builder. Interest rates for construction loans vary and many of the same financial requirements needed for traditional home loan approval will apply.

VA Construction Loans vs. Construction to Permanent VA Financing

One of the benefits of using a VA construction loan is that you will not be required to make any payments during the construction phase. Instead the builder is responsible for all fees and interest. Once the home is completed, the VA issues a certificate of completion, pays the builder and converts your loan into a regular mortgage.

Sounds great, right?

There was a time when VA construction loans were readily available, but thanks to many of the issues that tanked the U.S. housing market in recent years, a straight VA construction loan may be hard to find. If you find one, make sure you do your research before agreeing to any terms.

Currently, it is much easier to find lenders offering construction-to-permanent loans. In these cases, a construction loan is financed through a traditional or local lender. At the same time, a pre-approval letter for a VA loan is obtained with specific verbiage mentioning the intent to convert a construction loan to a permanent VA loan once the house is complete.

While this doesn’t guarantee you’ll get approved for a construction loan, it can make it a little easier. You will likely still be required to pay interest on the construction loan, and depending on your credit history and amount financed, you may be asked to provide a down payment.

VA Financing Special Requirements

Like a traditional construction loan, a VA lending institution will assign an inspector to your building project. The inspector is responsible for making sure each phase of construction is complete before money is issued for the next step of construction.

Also, in order to use the VA loan as part of the construction-to-permanent process, the builder must be registered with the VA and offer a minimum one-year warranty.

Just like a more traditional VA loan, there are limitations and restrictions. You must obtain a letter of eligibility from the VA before a lending institution can approve a VA loan. And a newly constructed home must still be inspected and appraised as part of the mortgage process. Deadlines and processes vary by state, so make sure you do your research ahead of time to avoid any surprises.

And don’t forget, there are caps on how much the VA will guarantee that vary by location. If you need a loan over that cap, you will be required to provide 25% of the difference between your loan amount and the cap as a down payment. But, even if you are buying over the VA cap, you’ll still enjoy the benefit of not having to pay PMI.

Have you financed your custom built home using a VA loan? What hurdles did you encounter?

Is a Disabled Veteran Eligible to Shop on Base?

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A MilitaryShoppers reader recently asked if a disabled veteran was allowed to shop at the commissary. That’s a good question.

You would think the answer should be yes, a disabled veteran can shop at the commissary but it isn’t that simple.

There are a variety of categories of people who are allowed access to the commissary and unfortunately, being a disabled veteran does not automatically grant you shopping privileges.

The guidelines are clear — a disabled veteran must be 100% disabled to have those privileges. There are other categories the disabled veteran may fall under though that would allow him/her to use the commissary. We’ve gathered all the information below to help you determine who is eligible to shop on base.

Who is eligible to shop at the commissary?

Uniformed Personnel: this includes all military branches, the USPHS Commissioned Corps., the NOAA Commissioned Corps, members of the Reserve Components and cadets and midshipmen of the Military Service academies.

Retired Service Members: There are different categories of retired personnel that are entitled to commissary privileges:

All personnel carried on the official retired lists (Active and Reserve Components) of the uniformed services who are retired with pay, granted retirement pay for physical disability, or entitled to retirement pay whether or not such pay is waived or pending due to age requirement; or enlisted personnel transferred to the Fleet Reserve of the Navy and the Fleet Marine Corps Reserve, after 20 or more years of active service.

Officers and crews of vessels, lighthouse keepers, and depot keepers of the former Lighthouse Service who retired.

Retired wage marine personnel, including retired noncommissioned ships officers, and crew members of vessels of NOAA and its predecessors (the Coast and Geodetic Survey and the Environmental Science Services Administration).”

Medal of Honor Recipients:  All Medal of Honor recipients are granted commissary privileges.

100% Disabled Veterans: Honorably discharged veterans that have 100% service-connected disability or a 100% unemployability as classified by the Department of Veterans Affairs are able to shop at the commissary.

This unfortunately means if you are a 99% or less disabled veteran, you don’t qualify.

Authorized Family Members including dependent children, lawful spouse, former un-remarried spouse, surviving spouse, surviving family member and surviving spouses and dependents of veterans that were honorably discharged posthumously determined to have 100% service connected disability have shopping privileges.

DoD Civilian Employees Stationed Outside the United States and their families can use the commissary.

Official DoD and Military Services Organizations and Activities: Any official DoD organization can use the commissary.

Involuntarily Separated Uniformed Personnel: Any service member that is involuntarily separated from active duty, as long as it is not for adverse reasons, can shop at the commissary for 2 years from the time of separation. A Select Reserve that is involuntarily separated also has a 2-year grace period to use the commissary.

Service Members Who Receive Sole Survivorship Discharge are granted commissary privileges for 2 years after the date of separation or after 2 years from when they were notified they had that privilege.

Hospitalized Veterans: Honorably discharged veterans can use the commissary when they are hospitalized in a location that also has a commissary. Note that this does not include veterans getting outpatient treatment.

DeCA Employees: DeCA personnel can purchase items for personal consumption during working hours to be consumed during breaks.

DoD Presidentially Appointed, Senate-Confirmed (PAS) Officers.

American National Red Cross (ARC) Personnel: They may be granted shopping privileges by an installation commander.

United Service Organizations (USO): USO leaders and their families who are assigned to overseas can use the commissary.

There are a few more exceptions to overseas commissaries. You might be surprised that DeCA does not decide who can shop at the commissary. The government decides based on the compensation status the service member or their family receives.

You can stop by the Pass and ID office if you think you should be able to shop on base but did not find a category here that you fit under. They have information on military benefits and issue ID cards.

They can also supply a visitor’s pass for a guest to join you on base. If you have commissary privileges, you are allowed to bring a visitor to the commissary, but they are not able to make any purchases.

While this is a lot of information, to answer the reader’s question if a disabled veteran can shop on base, the answer is only if they are a 100% disabled veteran or if they fall under any other category.

How do you feel about the requirement that a disabled veteran be 100% disabled to shop at the commissary? Do you think a disabled veteran of any percent should be allowed to shop on base?

Do you have a question about the commissary? We’d love to answer it. Please post your question in the comments section.

Are the Challenges of Military Life Worth It?

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At the end of the year, I find myself feeling a little introspective. This year has brought a lot of ups and downs, but perhaps the most monumental aspect of this year for my family is this:

we had our last military move.

Retirement is just around the corner. I’m not sure I even believe it yet. I grew up traveling the world with 2 active-duty parents. I took the oath of enlistment myself and then settled into the familiar life of a military spouse.

Every single moment of the first 40 years of my life has been influenced by the military community.

I have never known health care that wasn’t Tricare. Words like PX, PCS, TDY and ACUs are a part of my regular vocabulary. I have seen countless iterations of uniforms, moved from one side of the world to the other, and started and left more jobs than I can count.

As I think about this past year and imagine what a fast-approaching civilian future might look like, I have to wonder if the challenges we’ve faced as a military family have been worth it.

It’s a question not easily answered and so I did what any military spouse would do. I leaned on my military community and asked them: what are the biggest challenges of our particular lifestyle?

I empathized with their responses, and it wasn’t long before I noticed that almost every challenge listed was directly tied to the transient nature of our lifestyle. With that in mind, I sat down and gave some thought to this particular aspect of my life. Has moving 19 times been worth it?

Change Moving Is Never Easy

No matter your MOS or career field, this is one aspect of our military life that we all share in.

Often it’s a hassle, sometimes it’s an adventure, but it is always stressful.

Making sure you can find adequate housing, ensuring the school district is acceptable, finding a new job, setting up a new support system, picking a new primary care physician, figuring out which gate is open, the list goes on and on. I can honestly say that even though I have done all of these things many times, they never get any easier.

Moving is exciting when it’s just a set of orders and a daydream about the possibilities, but a nightmare when your entire life is packed into boxes, your spouse is headed out to God knows where for who knows how long, and you don’t even know where the closest grocery store is.

And then there is the separation. Separation from a spouse sent on deployment or TDY. Separation from extended family. Separation from the friends and co-workers who became your surrogate family when you first arrived at the new military installation.

As I sat reliving the stress and strain of military life, I could feel my blood pressure begin to climb.

And then it hit me. The lessons this life has taught me are invaluable.

Lessons Blessings in Disguise

If I had never traveled the world, I wouldn’t have lived in the beautiful, red brick townhome in England. Never had milk delivered in glass bottles right to our door. Never discovered that boiled Brussels sprouts are entirely unpalatable. I would never have played hide-and-seek in the small grove of olive and apricot trees on Crete. Never learned to swim in the Mediterranean.

If I hadn’t changed schools ever couple of years, I would have missed out on friendships that forever changed the way I saw the world and understood people. I would never have listened to a foreign friend tell me her secret dream was to one day become an American.

If I hadn’t said goodbye to countless friends, I would never have had the chance to say hello to so many others.

If I hadn’t waved goodbye to my spouse, I might never have learned that I am strong, smart and able to take care of our household on my own. And I would never have been able experience the sweet relief of watching him walk through the front door unharmed.

If I hadn’t agreed to quit a job to go where the Army sent us, I might never have learned how to make giant Christmas bows or develop a database or process a mortgage. I might never have learned how to create websites or work in social media.

I might never have learned that friendship, comradery, resiliency and a sense of duty will always trump adversity.

So has military life been worth it? For me, I think the answer is undeniably, yes.

How would you answer this question: Knowing what you know now, would you live your military life all over again?

5 Tips for Writing Your College Application Essay When You’re a Veteran

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You’ve served in the Armed Forces and you’re ready for the next chapter of your life. For many veterans, the next stop after separating from military service is college. And why not? You earned your GI Bill, you might as well take advantage of this military benefit.

But attending your first-choice university may not be as simple as you think. The college application form may be lengthily and require the dreaded personal essay. This essay is an essential component of applying for colleges and can’t be overlooked or rushed through.

When you’re a veteran writing a college application essay you may be asking yourself

“should I talk about my military experience?”

For many veterans, you went to boot camp right after graduating from high school, so your past experiences are solely your military experiences.

Your deployments, specialized training and overseas assignments have shaped you as an individual and will influence your experience as a veteran turned college student. Here are 5 tips for writing your college application essay when you’re a veteran.

5 Tips for Writing Your College Application Essay When You're a Veteran

What questions do you have about writing your college application essay?

Talk Positively About Your Military Experiences

Anyone who has spent more than 5 minutes in the military can easily list their complaints, but what about the positive experiences? As a service member you were taught leadership skills, problem-solving techniques and focused discipline. In your college application essay, you may want to write about the projects that you were in charge of, the troops that you led and the maturity that you have gained through these experiences.

College admission board members are looking for college students who are mature leaders for their campuses. That’s a positive asset for veterans looking to attend college, so write about this advantage in your essay.

Discuss Your Personal Challenges

Everyone, and I mean everyone, has overcome a personal challenge. What was your personal challenge and how did you work through it?

As a veteran, you’ve done more and seen more in your 6 years in the Army than most people will in a lifetime. Your exposure to stressful circumstances and learning to work through them are all personal challenges that you can discuss in your college application essay.

Maybe you’re still working through a personal challenge. That’s OK too. Write about how attending this university and earning a specific degree will help you overcome your challenge.

Channel Your Personality

Don’t be afraid to be you in your college application essay. The college admission board members want to get a sense of you and your personality through this essay. It’s hard to shine in 300 words or less, so that’s why you need to focus on your unique personality strengths.

If you aren’t sure if your essay is highlighting your personality, let your spouse read it. He or she knows you better than anyone else. They can tell you if your essay is showing your polished personality or if it’s too generic.

Forget the Military Alphabet Soup

Once you start talking in military lingo, it’s hard to break the habit. But you need to remove any military jargon and acronyms from your college application essay. If you write TBS, FOB or OCONUS in your essay, the university staff member reading your essay will most likely be confused. Search your essay for military-speak and try to translate as much of it as possible into civilian talk.

Not sure if you removed all the military jargon? Ask a friend, who isn’t in the military, to read your essay. The military alphabet soup will jump out at him or her immediately.

Don’t Write or Revision Alone

Your college application essay is a vital component of your application. You shouldn’t write it the night before your application’s deadline and submit it without someone else reading it. Everyone makes typos. Spellcheck won’t catch every mistake, so ask for help.

Writing a college application essay isn’t easy for anyone. Even English majors struggle with finding the right words to express themselves and their aspirations.

The struggle is normal, but there are many resources to help veterans as they transition from active duty to college student. Take advantage of these resources and use them to help you write your best college application essay.

What questions do you have about writing a college application essay?

When the Time Comes to Pick Our Forever Home

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My forever home. For years, I never said those words aloud. I occasionally thought them when unpacking 300 boxes in a new-to-us rental with its oddly shaped kitchen and drab white walls.

My forever home will definitely have a basement. It will have an attic and a screen door. My forever home will be painted bright colors. My forever home must have a large backyard with a healthy lawn for the dog that I promised my daughters we can have in our forever home.

But lately, I’ve been thinking in more concrete terms about the location of our forever home. Maybe it’s because my husband has made it over the hump of 10 years of military service and we are committed emotionally and financially to his military retirement at the 20 year mark.

Maybe it’s because my parents, sisters, in-laws and hometown friends are asking, “Where are you planning to live once you aren’t in the Navy anymore?”

Right now, the Navy decides where we live and we love that we don’t need to make this decision. Truthfully we haven’t decided where we want to live when the time comes to make this decision.

  • Will our forever home be in his home state?
  • Or in a former duty station that we fell in love with 7 years ago?
  • Or will we make our forever home in a city that we’ve only visited?
When We Pick Our Forever Home

How will you decide where you will live once your service member is no longer in the military?

Here are 3 factors that I’m considering when thinking about the location of my family’s forever home.

Job Opportunities. The No. 1 thing we are taking into consideration when deciding where to live after military life is job growth. We are currently researching cities and states where there may be potential jobs for my husband and I. So articles like this one, 2015’s Best & Worst States for Military Retirees tend to catch our eyes. This study ranked North Dakota as the No. 1 state for job opportunities for veterans. It ranked Maryland as the worst state for job opportunities for veterans.

Military Installation Amenities. The transition from military to civilian life is a challenge for anyone, but for me, I think the biggest change would be not living on base anymore. I can’t imagine not shopping at the commissary or working out at the base fitness center. Personally, these military installation amenities are perks that I’m not willing to give up once my husband retires from military service. For that reason, I would prefer it if my forever home is located in a military town. Then I can continue to buy our Sunday steaks at the commissary and daughter’s running shoes at the PX. Plus it would be really awesome to take advantage of Space-A travel with my husband when we have the time to travel.

Community Involvement. As a military spouse, I am accustomed to a life of insta-friends. I know my neighbors’ names, along with the names of their children and their dogs. Every 2 years, I put down roots in a new community and find ways to volunteer both inside and outside the gate. For my forever home, I want to live in a neighborhood where I can ask my neighbor for a cup of sugar. I want to be friends with the people who live down the street. I want my forever home city to have nonprofit organizations that I’m passionate about and want to dedicate time to volunteering with this organization.

Right now, my sister is trying to convince me to live down the street from her and my best friend wants me to live around the corner from her house. But I’m not ready to make a commitment about the location of our forever house. Not yet at least.

I prefer to dream about it. I’ll make that decision with my husband when the time comes…about 5 minutes after his military retirement ceremony.

How will you decide where you will live once your service member is no longer in the military? Will your forever home be located near your family? Near a military base? What factors should you take into consideration when deciding where to live after military life?