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4 Positive New Year’s Resolutions for MilSpouses

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With the New Year less than a week away, resolutions are one of the first things that come to mind. It gives us a reason to start something new or get back on track with something that has been a project of ours for awhile.

The New Year is the perfect opportunity for us to reevaluate our lives. Resolutions aren’t for everyone and can be argued that military spouses should ditch it because our lifestyle is so fluid. It could be difficult to stick to a big commitment, especially if an unexpected PCS comes along or deployment.

As military spouses, I encourage exploring unique New Year’s resolutions that are perfectly tailored for the military lifestyle. Instead of focusing on what to “fix” with our lives, let’s create resolutions that bring out the best of military life.

4 Positive New Year’s Resolutions that Military Spouses Should Make in 2016

4 Positive New Year's Resolutions for Military Spouses

What’s your New Year’s resolution for 2016?

Revisit or create your duty station bucket list.

My husband and I made a huge Washington, D.C., bucket list when we first arrived. We were excited for the opportunity to go around and see all the history in our nation’s capital. Flash-forward almost 2 years now, we’ve only scraped the surface. It was just a month ago that my husband was able to visit the National Mall as a tourist, instead of quickly passing it by.

We’ve also gotten comfortable with our favorite places and would continue to go to them when we had free time (i.e. Shenandoah National Park) but there are so many other wonderful parks nearby too! Really, we should take our free time to cross off more points on our duty station bucket list.

In 2016, we’re going to revisit this list and make sure we’re on track to finish it completely before orders come our way. With that said, military spouses should take a look at their duty station bucket lists too.

Try a new activity.

I’ve met lots of truly amazing military spouses in my journey that have opened my eyes to some new activities. I recently participated in a painting party that was arranged by a local military spouse. It sounds silly, but I was nervous going into it at first because I don’t have much artistic ability. I had so much fun painting though!

Whether it’s a painting party or playing a new sport, a new activity is a wonderful way to engage with your local friends and maybe add another hobby to your list. Next time a military spouse invites you to a new activity, say yes and give it a shot!

Volunteer for something you are passionate about.

Military spouses love to give back to the community. I’ve witnessed that as a military kid and now as a military spouse. There are so many wonderful organizations out there that benefit our community.

It’s a natural addition to a military spouses’ resolution list.

I spend my free time volunteering at the local spouses’ club fundraising for dependent scholarships. It really gives me fulfillment to dedicate my time to help military spouses and children achieve higher education.

Travel to someplace new or unexpected.

I advocate for traveling. I blame my parents for giving me wanderlust as a military kid. It’s really opened my eyes to the world and has given me an appreciation for other cultures, even within the United States.

Yes, the military helps your wanderlust by stationing you at new locations every handful of years. Another great opportunity for military spouses to travel is tagging along for a TDY for at least part of the time (that’s how we saw the Grand Canyon).

But, don’t take your spouse’s leave time for granted either! Plan time to visit family and friends and take time off for a much needed vacation too.

My husband and I have been planning at least a week away at a new location every year we’ve known each other. This past year we went to Alaska, the year before that the Caribbean and we’re planning to go to New Zealand in 2016.

What’s your New Year’s resolution for 2016?

When Deployment Is the Reason Mom or Dad Won’t Be Home for the Holidays

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The holidays are coming and you are supposed to be getting excited about the season, however, this year, your spouse is not going to be there. They are going to be on a deployment or away on training.

When Deployment Is the Reason Mom or Dad Won't Be Home for Christmas

It may be hard for your child to understand why their parent is on a deployment during the holidays.

Many military families have been through this. For us personally, my husband has missed quite a few holidays because he has been deployed or had to be away from us for different reasons.

As soon as you know that your spouse will be deployed for the holidays, you need to make a plan to tell your kids. If they are very young you might not have to say much if anything at all. Just do what you would normally do.

If they are older and can understand what is going on, let them know that a parent will be gone because of a deployment. Explain to them that the parent who has to be away because of the deployment wants to be there for the holidays but they will not be able to. Share how much they will miss being home during that time.

Help the child understand that the deployment is the reason the parent will be gone and not because they don’t want to be there.

When Deployment Is the Reason Mom or Dad Won't Be Home for Christmas

Plan to decorate and celebrate, even if your spouse isn’t home this holiday season.

If there is a small chance that your spouse might make it home in time, don’t tell your children about that. Planning to surprise them later with the news that the deployment is over would be better than having to tell them that their mom or dad will not be there after you told them they would be.

After you have told your children you should decide what you will do during the holidays when your spouse is deployed. Some people decide to visit family. I was able to do this one year and being with family made that time during the deployment a lot easier on me and my son.

If you can not visit family, maybe you can have someone come to you. Ask your family to see if anyone is willing to come if they do not offer. They might not realize how much being there would be able to help you during the deployment.

Another option is to find friends to spend the day with who are also in the middle of a deployment. We did this with my husband’s second deployment. He was going to be gone for Christmas so I made a plan with a few of my friends. We had Christmas at our own homes and then met at a friend’s house to make a Christmas meal together. That way, we were not alone, our kids would have other children to play with and being with others helped us not dwell on the fact that our husbands were deployed. The day went well and we all had a great time.

If your spouse is going to be gone for the whole holiday season you should still plan to decorate and celebrate as much as you can.

Some parts of the holiday will be different. You might not make a big meal and you won’t be able to play Santa together but keeping a lot of the same traditions as you normally do each year is important for the kids. You don’t want them to feel like they are missing out on everything just because their mom or dad is deployed.

Try to keep your spirits up during this time. Remember that the deployment will be over eventually and you can always have a belated celebration then. Do the best you can to make the holidays great for you and your children even if your spouse is gone on a deployment.

What are your tips for talking to your children about deployment during the holiday season?

10 Duty Stations to See Fall Foliage

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We welcomed autumn officially a couple weeks ago and I’m already starting to feel like it’s fully arrived because the evenings are cooler and pumpkin-spiced everything is everywhere. I’m also whipping out my closed-toe shoes and layerable shirts. Bring it on autumn!

10 Best Duty Stations to Experience Fall Foliage

Autumn is my favorite season. What do you love about autumn?

I consider myself a Texan, so I didn’t typically witness a change of seasons growing up. I honestly don’t remember the leaves turning till I moved to New York. That’s when I began appreciating the autumn season. It’s the right temperature for a light coat and hours of hiking.

Even after moving out of New York, I’ve realized that Virginia had some beautiful autumn sights to see too. Based on my experiences and with the help of Fodor’s and Travel+Leisure, I’ve wrangled together the 10 best duty locations to witness fall foliage:

10 Best Duty Stations to Experience Fall Foliage

10 Best Duty Stations to Experience Fall Foliage

I’ve been lucky enough to see the autumn leaves myself when my husband was stationed at Fort Drum.

Fort Drum, New York. Despite having some of the harshest winter weather, Fort Drum is near some awesome sights to see the autumn leaves. It’s a couple hours away from the Finger Lakes region to the southwest and the Adirondacks to the east. I’ve been lucky enough to see the autumn leaves myself when my husband was stationed up there.

Fort Carson and Peterson AFB, Colorado. These two military installations are so close to the Pikes Peak area and that’s a beautiful location to see the autumn leaves. If you have a chance for a weekend getaway and feeling adventurous, your family can head to Aspen. That’s one of the best places to experience the fall foliage. Because you’ll be going through some mountain ranges, the drive would be a great experience in itself.

Washington, D.C. My husband and I heard about Shenandoah National Park early on into our tour in the D.C. Metro area. It’s only a couple hours west and it’s truly an amazing site once you get yourself on Skyline Drive no matter the season. Last year, we made an effort to travel there as the autumn leaves were turning. What a beautiful color mixture of orange, brown and green. Don’t forget your Annual Military Pass when you go to any National Park!

Malmstrom AFB, Montana. Glacier National Park is less than a 3-hour drive from this base in Montana and is truly for the courageous because most of the concessions in the area close up shop in September. It’s said that the wildlife and foliage is just too good to pass up if you’re in the area.

Joint Base Lewis-McChord, Washington. I haven’t been to the JBLM area in the fall, but I’ve heard such great things. If the sights were beautiful in the springtime (that’s when I visited the area), I can only image how it looks in this time of the year. The Olympic Peninsula is noted to have amazing views, especially while driving through.

Fort Leonard Wood, Missouri. FLW doesn’t have the best reputation as a top pick duty station. It might be because it’s secluded, which actually makes it an ideal location for a family that loves camping and the outdoors. The post is less than 2 hours away from Lake of the Ozarks and that park boasts some of the best fall sites in the Midwest.

Luke AFB, Arizona. Sedona, Ariz., is a popular destination to hike and bike, especially through the red rocks and Luke AFB is only a couple hours away. Luckily, when my husband was stationed at Fort Huachuca, we drove up toward the Sedona area. That was a relatively long drive at about 4.5 hours, but we really wanted to ride the Verde Canyon Railroad to see the autumn leaves. I can’t forget to mention the Ales on Rails event that the Verde Canyon Railroad does this month too. We had a great time drinking craft beer and sightseeing in the Sedona area.

USCG Cape May, New Jersey and Dover AFB, Delaware. Cape May is a quaint town in New Jersey that houses a Coast Guard Sector. There is also a ferry from Dover, Delaware, that takes you directly to Cape May. Although this historic coastal town gets most of its tourist in the summer months, it’s also a great place to see the fall foliage while strolling the streets. If you’re stationed at Joint Base McGuire–Dix–Lakehurst, Cape May is only a couple hours away.

Enter your favorite autumn photos in MilitaryShoppers’ monthly photo contest. One winner is chosen every month.

Tips for Traveling with Children During the Hectic Holidays

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Traveling with children during the holidays can be an adventure. The key to a stress free trip (oh how we wish) is preparation. You’ve spent countless hours making sure every detail is taken care of for your family these holidays. Something is, of course, going to go wrong however. Flights get delayed or worse, canceled. Cars get flat tires and holiday traffic can slow down your travel time.

To keep your sanity while driving or flying with your children this holiday season, use these travel tips to find peace and joy.

Tips for Holiday Travel with Children

Expect delays when traveling this holiday season.

  1. Mentally prepare yourself that something might go wrong. The holidays are stressful enough; don’t add to it by expecting travel to be perfect.
  2. Prepare early. There’s nothing like the stress that comes with the last minute to-do list.
  3. Make a list of what needs to be packed and check items off as they go into the suitcase. Keep the list on top of the suitcase until you leave so you don’t question yourself 50 times whether you packed your daughter’s favorite pajamas or your own toothbrush.
  4. Buy small new toys to entertain your children. We all wish our kids would sit patiently but what really happens is they get bored. You don’t need to dip into your Hanukkah or Christmas fund; pick up a few things at the Dollar Store. A new coloring book with Jake and the Never Land Pirates crayons can buy you some extra quiet time.
  5. Pack snacks and drinks. There is nothing worse than a “hangry” child (angry because they are hungry). Choose sippy cups that don’t spill and snacks that aren’t messy. Have wipes and a plastic bag for the trash.

    Tips for Holiday Travel with Children

    What do you pack to keep your children busy?

Driving Tips

  • Make sure the car is clean and extra items are removed. Children will make a mess and you will accumulate things throughout the road trip.
  • Stock the car with supplies. Pack toys, snacks, paper towels and plastic bags for the inevitable mess and extra bags in case your child gets motion sickness.
  • Place things strategically in the car so that they are easy to reach. You don’t want to listen to your daughter beg for something she can’t reach for the next 50 miles. Make sure you can reach things too so you can keep your eyes on the road.
  • Consider your child’s sleep schedule. If it is a short drive, consider waiting closer to nap time so that they may sleep longer. If it is a long drive consider leaving early in the morning so they sleep the first few hours.
  • Dress in layers so that they can be removed in the car. We’ve all heard the whine of “I’m hot” or “I’m cold.” Everyone isn’t going to be comfortable at the same temperature so layers will help even that out.
  • Have directions in more than one area. If your toddler is playing on your phone and your car’s GPS suddenly says “recalculating,” one of you might have a meltdown. He is not going to want to give it up and you need directions. You could do a crazy thing…print out directions.
  • Incorporate bathroom breaks and stretching stops. Make each child “try” to go to the bathroom so you don’t have another one asking to stop 5 minutes later. Provide the opportunity to get out of the car and stretch. Let the kids run around at a rest stop. They’ll wear themselves out and you’ll have some time of peace back in the car again.
  • If your children fall asleep, utilize this as “me time.” Listen to an audio book or grownup music. Turning the radio off and just having a moment of quiet can help you relax as well.

    Tips for Holiday Travel with Children

    Do you prefer to board first or board the airplane last with your kids?

Plane Tips

  • Completely empty your diaper bag or purse and restock it with only the items you need for the flight. When your baby is crying, digging through your bag for his pacifier while trying to board the plane will stress you out.
  • Get to the airport early. Make sure you have enough time to find parking, check your bag, get through the extra-long security line and still reach your gate with plenty of time.
  • Prepare as if your flight might get delayed. Have extra diapers, formula, snacks and toys.
  • Only pack quiet toys that won’t roll away. This will keep you from being annoyed by a noisy toy or continuously picking up your child’s toy.
  • Board the plane early or last. Families are called to board the plane before the rest of the group. If you need to pop down a stroller or settle your children in their seats this is a great time. If you have a fussing baby or an anxious child, wait until the last person boards to give you time to calm them.

No matter how you travel this holiday season, there are many ways to plan ahead and limit stress. You can’t prevent everything from going wrong, but if you take these steps you might just find the Merry in your Christmas.

Want more tips for traveling with small children? Visit the MilitaryShoppers’ Pinterest page.

The Top 10 Best Military Vacation Secret Spots

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Acceptable. Fine. A bed. That’s normally how I describe temporary military lodges. As a military spouse, I don’t mind bunking there because it’s cheap, but I don’t brag about the amenities to my civilian friends. seward alaskaI brag about the price. That’s the majority of temporary military lodging. But there is something better.

It’s those cabins, townhouses and rooms with a view that are the best-kept secrets of the military.

They are the lodges that you know you should share with the newbie military spouses, but you don’t want to share your insider information. You are like a screaming toddler saying “it’s mine. It’s all mine.”

If you want super awesome military facilities, try the New Sanno in Tokyo, the Shades of Green Disney Resort, Hawaii’s Hale Koa Hotel or Edelweiss Lodge with views of the Alps. At these facilities you don’t get what you pay for. You get more than what you pay for. There is 1 small problem with these military perk places. Even though these hotels are exclusively for active duty and veterans, affordable doesn’t equal available. Often reservations need to be made a year in advance especially during the peak travel season. So instead of trying to wedge our way into the high-traffic military lodges, let’s take the road less traveled.

Let’s visit the top 10 military vacation secret spots that you will never read about in Travel & Leisure magazine.yellowstone

  1. Marines’ Memorial Club, San Francisco, Calif. Guest reviews on Yelp said “This is our second home away from home when we visit SF. The staff is very accommodating and attentive to your needs, service is top-notch, the location is perfect, the facility is excellent and makes you feel right at home.” Did I mention there is a free happy hour and free breakfast? It’s my No. 1 choice for a hotel in downtown San Francisco.
  2. Seward Resort, Seward, Alaska. Alaska is one of those places that I don’t want to be stationed at, but I would love to visit. The Seward Resort offers a way for my family to visit Alaska without the 3-year orders. The website brags “Are you looking for an exciting and affordable way to see the Last Frontier? You’ve found it! We’ve got the best of Alaska in our backyard: world-class fishing, spectacular glaciers, an abundance of wildlife, and recreational opportunities galore!” Recreational opportunities galore. You know it’s got to be good. Perks? Free cross country ski rental and wine exclusively made for the resort’s guests.
  3. Del Mar Beach Resort at Camp Pendleton, Calif. One Yelp reviewer wrote “Want a little getaway??? This is your spot. Located right on the Camp Pendleton Marine Corps Base with great prices! The winter rates are 25% off! I stayed here this past weekend and was very pleased. I stayed in the Luxury Villa where you have access to a patio with grill and a bonfire. A full complete kitchen.” I’ve stayed here before and it’s a great facility. It’s perfect for families who want to be near Legoland.
  4. Rocky Mountain Blue at Keystone Resort, Keystone, Colo. Located 1 hour from Denver, this is a must-stay military lodge for service members who loved to hit the slopes. From ice skating to Nordic skiing, snowmobiling to snowshoeing or sleigh rides, Keystone has it all. Going in the summer? No problem. The website outlines a variety of activities. Wagon rides, anyone?
  5. Fourth Cliff Family Recreation Area, Humarock, Mass. According to its website, Fourth Cliff Family Recreation Area is a 56-acre seaside resort located in Humarock (Scituate) on Massachusetts’ South Shore. Fourth Cliff is in a superb location, sitting high on a cliff at the end of a peninsula, overlooking the Atlantic Ocean on one side and the scenic North River on the other. It offers an excellent opportunity for solitude and relaxation.
  6. Soldiers’, Sailors, Marines’, Coast Guard, and Airmen’s Club, New York City, N.Y. If you want history, you must make a reservation at this “Home Away From Home” from service members and their families. This club has existed for more than 90 years and provides hospitality and accommodations for 15,000 Armed Forces personnel annually. One Yelp reviewer wrote “It’s not the Ritz, but you cannot beat the location for this price. We paid $70/person per night (based on your rate/rank) Just blocks away from the Empire State Building, we felt like we were right in the middle of the action.”
  7. Yellowstone Country Trailers, Mountain Home AFB.  Want to stay 2 miles from the south entrance to Yellowstone National Park? The Air Force maintain 11 trailers at Flagg Ranch Campground. “These trailers are self-contained, include cooking and eating utensils, and are ready for your enjoyment,” according to its website.
  8. Pacific Beach Resort, Pacific, Wash. In the shadow of the snow-capped Olympic Mountains, Pacific Beach Resort offers a Navy-run hotel and cabins lining the bluff along with a full-service restaurant and conference center. Bikes and mopeds are available for rent at the shore.
  9. Fort Tuthill Recreation Area, Flagstaff, Ariz. If you love the outdoors, then you need to stay at the Fort Tuthill Recreation Area. The accommodations range from yurts with wrap-around decks to 2-story, 3-bedroom cabins. The backyard has a fire pit, deck and a picnic table.
  10. Lake of The Ozarks Recreation Area, Linn Creek, Missouri. Nicknamed LORA, this 360-acre facility is designed to provide a relaxing environment for military families. LORA offers cabin rentals, full and partial RV hook-ups, rustic campsites, a lakefront pavilion, a swimming beach, boat docks, a full-service marina, boat and Jet Ski rentals, boat/RV storage rental, parking, picnic areas, a launching ramp, fishing and a small convenience store.  It’s open yearround.

Have you stayed at any of these military facilities? What’s your favorite military lodge?