Military Life News

Military Life News, Commissary Rewards and Military Discounts

Cheers to the Commissaries Selling Beer, Wine

By

You read that correctly – commissaries will begin selling beer and wine this summer.

The exact date hasn’t been announced, but it is official. A memo written by Robert Wilkie, Under Secretary of Defense for Personnel and Readiness, stated that commissaries will begin selling both beer and wine. This should happen by the end of July.

I was excited when I found out commissaries would be selling both beer and wine.

OK, I wasn’t nearly as excited about the beer as I was about the wine. I’m more of a wine person. I shop at the commissary weekly and this will be so much more convenient to buy both groceries and wine in one place rather than driving to the other end of town just for wine. It looks better when you buy a full cart of groceries with a bottle of wine than buying only wine. I tell myself that anyway.

The Dahlgren commissary, the closest one to me, is tiny. It has six aisles and usually just one cashier. I love it though. Somehow I manage to buy most of my week’s worth of groceries in that little place.

I can’t help but think, where are they going to fit the wine and beer? What products will lose placement? Will they sell the type of wine I like or am I getting excited over this for no reason?

Selling beer and wine in larger commissaries means more of a selection of both. Luckily in the D.C. area, where I live, there are a number of commissaries.

I was lucky enough to be at the grand opening of the new commissary at Fort Belvoir last year. It is massive. I will be going back to see what their beer and wine selection looks like once it’s on the shelves. I’m sure it will be much larger than the one available at Dahlgren.

It will be interesting to see how the prices compare as well.

The commissaries have run a few tests of selling beer and wine previously, but this will be the first time they will be sold at all commissaries as a standard.

There are a few specifics that were released. Commissaries will purchase beer and wine from the exchanges and resell it to commissary patrons. This is to hopefully reduce the impact beer and wine sales at commissaries will have on sales of the same items at exchanges. Profits from sales at military exchanges fund on-base MWR programs and officials don’t want to take away from that.

Prices therefore are supposed to be comparable to those at exchanges.

Related: Why I Think Military Wives Are More Likely to Binge Drink

Item pricing at commissaries moved to variable pricing last year. That means that all commissaries don’t sell products at the same price now. Prices vary based on the market. Wine and beer prices will therefore also be different from place to place. According to Robert Wilkie, prices should be comparable to those at local grocery stores.

One thing that local grocery stores don’t have that commissaries might have is hard liquor.

The Subcommittee on Military Personnel recently tasked the Secretary of Defense with having a study conducted on adding the sale of distilled spirits to commissaries. In this study, they will look at local and state laws as well as provide estimated revenue from sales. The secretary will brief the Committee on Armed Services by September.

Your favorite alcoholic beverage might be on the shelf of your local commissary before long if things work out.

When will your commissary have beer and wine?

Unfortunately, I can’t give you a set date as those dates haven’t been made public yet. Check with your local commissary for an announcement. Wine and beer are set to make their debut by the end of July.

What do you think of the commissaries selling wine and beer?

Should I Feed or Tip Our Movers?

By

It’s PCS season and once again military spouses are asking the big question, should I tip or feed the movers?

Should I Feed or Tip My Movers During a PCS?

Do you provide food for your movers? What kind of food do you give them?

There is a wide difference in opinion here. Some people always tip, others tip based on performance and for some, the thought of tipping has never crossed their mind.

The same goes for feeding the people that pack up all your precious belongings. Many military families choose to feed the moving crews in some way but there are still people that do not.

There are people that both tip and feed the movers and some that choose to only do one of those things.

There are also people who do neither.

Everyone has a strong opinion on the matter as well.

What Food Should I Feed My Packers or Movers When We PCS?

If you choose to provide food for the moving team, what do you feed them?

Many military spouses responded to this question saying that they buy pizza. I have bought pizza many times. My parents bought the movers pizza when I was growing up as an Army brat so that was the norm, or so I thought.

Also, in the early stages of military life, families don’t tend to have much money to spare on individual meals for a large group of people. We didn’t.

After a multitude of moves, my perspective, as well as wallet, has changed.

Now I give the movers a few options for lunch and then my husband goes to pick it up. I also always make sure to have cold water in the fridge for everyone.

Who wants to eat pizza every day? Could you imagine spending hours packing up things and getting pizza constantly?

Some military spouses say that they provide breakfast or lunch and some provide both. Most said they have water for them and offer pizza, subs, Chick-fil-A or KFC.

A few said they offer some of the beverages they aren’t moving with to the movers. One military spouse said this:

 “My husband once gave them bottles of booze. They loved him for it. I was mortified.”

How Much Should I Tip Our Packers During a PCS?

I haven’t tipped our packers during a PCS. Actually, I hadn’t thought about it until someone recently brought it up.

One military spouse had a good point. She said, “I tip the groomer and nail salon techs for goodness’ sakes.” If she’s going to tip for those services, it makes sense to tip the people who take care of her precious belongings.

When asked if they tip, a number of women said that they were told by the TMO, Traffic Management Office, that tipping was not allowed. Not all moving companies follow this however. Even if that is their policy, some movers will still take the cash tip.

In the civilian world, tipping is part of proper etiquette. The average tip is $20 per mover. That could really add up for military moves if you have separate people that pack your belongings up and then unpack at your destination.

I have had as many as eight people packing up our home. There are a lot of costs involved in moving and an additional $160 for the packers’ tips is not necessarily something I would want to spend my money on. That cost really adds up if you have to tip just as much when the next group unpacks at your new duty station.

Related: 5 Steps You Can Take Today to Make Your PCS Go Smoothly This Summer

Everyone has a different perspective however.

Some people only tip if they notice that the movers are particularly friendly or pack things how they want them to be packed. If you choose to tip, make sure you give the money to each mover personally. Don’t just give it to the leader of the packing crew. They might not actually divvy up the money. Also, handing out tips to each person shows that you recognize their individual effort.

Hopefully, the movers are grateful no matter if you provide a meal or a tip them.

If you are going to buy a meal, give them some options and let them choose. They will likely appreciate having something other than pizza.

If you decide to tip, you choose how much to give them. While $20 per person is the norm in the civilian world, it isn’t necessarily the same for military moves.

Share your PCS tips with us. Do you provide food for your movers? What kind of food do you give them?

Our Guide to Sending Care Packages to Your Service Member

By

by Amanda Marksmeier, Guest Contributor

Whether you are shipping your first care package or your last it can be difficult to know what to include and what to leave out.

Items such as firearms, explosives and radioactive materials should not be included, but did you know many foreign countries ban the shipping and receiving of playing cards, used clothes and saccharine?

Our Guide to Sending Care Packages to Your Service Member

Themed care packages are all the rage. Not feeling creative? No problem, search Pinterest for military care package ideas.

Your Don’t Pack It Guide for Deployment Care Packages

Our service members deploy to countries with strict religious beliefs and rules. If you are sending care packages to countries such as Iraq, Afghanistan, Syria or any other predominately Muslim country do not pack pork products. Many people in these regions follow diets which prohibit foods made from pigs, so that means no bacon bits.

While we are on the subject of religion, anti-Muslim books, articles, and movies are strictly forbidden so don’t send them. Also, anything considered lewd or pornographic should not be included. It is important to be respectful of others’ customs and beliefs.

Cash and high-valued items should be left at home. Packages can “disappear,” be damaged or simply lost in the mail.

Pro-tip: if you can’t afford to lose it, don’t pack it!

This goes for items that hold sentimental value as well. While you may be tempted to send family heirlooms don’t, these items can’t be replaced if lost or damaged.

What You Should Send in Deployment Care Packages

Now comes the fun part, what you can include in a care package.

Non-perishable food is the No. 1 requested item. Think canned tuna, instant meals, jerky, ramen, I could go on, but you get the idea. In many cases, soldiers miss meals due to missions or the inability to make it to the DFAC. Your service member will be grateful to have a meal from home after a long day.

Care packages are a perfect excuse to print all those pictures saved in your digital cloud. Service members can hang photos in their bunk, tape them to vehicles or keep them in the pockets of their uniforms.

It’s comforting to have photos of friends and family near you on deployment.

Fragrant soaps and washes should be packed separately in plastic bags. I once sent my husband a box of soaps (not in plastic bags) packed with candies. He ended up with candies that tasted like soap!

More Care Packages Tips

Mailing packages is expensive! The U.S. Post Office offers free flat rate boxes to help with the costs. Care packages in flat rate boxes can be sent to APO/FPO/DPO at domestic shipping rates.

Save a trip to the post office by ordering your shipping supplies for free through the USPS website. Schedule a pick-up, pay for shipping and complete the customs forms all online at https://www.usps.com/ship/apo-fpo-dpo.htm.

Oh, those darn customs forms! Don’t be afraid. Custom forms aren’t as scary as they appear. All you need is your service member’s address, the list of items and an estimated value of each item in the care package.

The Click-N-Ship option on the USPS website walks through the steps to complete customs forms. Custom forms need to be completed for each package you send.

Related: Tips on Sending a Care Package to a Military Dog

Themed care packages are all the rage. Not feeling creative? No problem, borrow someone else’s ideas. Carefully crafted boxes are posted all over social media. Visit military spouse Facebook pages to ask for care package ideas. Also search Pinterest for military care packages. Have fun, be creative and think “inside” the box.

Books, movies and magazines make wonderful additions to care packages. Deployed service members work long hours in harsh conditions so when there is downtime entertainment is desperately needed.

I am sure everyone remembers the “Frozen” videos with service members belting out “Let it Go.” You know they watched the movie a dozen times to learn the song. Maybe we’ll be blessed with “This is Me” sing-a-longs in the future.

Add extra items so your service member can share with his or her battle buddies. Remember not everyone has someone to send them care packages.

The most important part of a care package is the “care” that is included. Packages remind the men and woman serving they have not been forgotten.

What questions do you have about sending care packages?

Amanda Marksmeier is an Army wife and mother of four. She works as an employment specialist assisting the military community in achieving their career goals. Amanda is also a contributing writer for a quarterly employment journal and has written for several military affiliated blogs.

Pet Sitting Options for Military Families

By

Vacations are meant to be relaxing, but if you’re worried about your furry family member back home it can be anything but stress-free. Finding reliable pet pitting options can be challenging for military families. We move often and need to start from scratch building our pet care support teams.

3 Pet Sitting Options for Military Families to Consider for Their Summer Vacations

Whether you’re headed away for a long weekend or a few weeks to visit your parents in Montana, here are three pet sitting options for you to think about no matter where you are stationed with the military.

Pet Sitting Options for Military Families

Do your due diligence before hiring a pet sitter or kennel. It’s important that you like and trust the folks who will be caring for your dog or cat while you are away.

Pet Boarding Facilities

Some call them kennels (we’ll use this name) or pet hotels, but generally, these are places where multiple animals are being cared for at the same time.

Kennels are businesses that are typically owned and/or operated by individuals that have a background in pet care. They often offer complimentary services, like grooming, training or doggie daycare too. Some are operated by a veterinary clinic.

Each animal will have their own separate living area or kennel, where they will spend their days and nights. Many kennels include daily exercise in their basic package or offer extra daycare type interaction for an additional cost.

Kennels often offer trial daycare in order to ensure their facility is a good fit for your pet. They also require current vet records with evidence of standard vaccinations.

Pros:

  • Kennels are licensed businesses and have to follow laws regarding cleanliness or licensing for pet care services.
  • Your animal will get professional level care in a dedicated facility.
  • Your pet has the option for social interaction with other animals or with humans.
  • You can add on other services during your pet’s stay.
  • Staff is trained on basic animal care and health issues.

Cons:

  • There will be multiple pets in the kennel at once.
  • More than one species of animal might be boarded.
  • You will not be able to predict how your pet interacts with the other animals during the exercise or socializing portions of the day.
  • Your animal will be in a kennel, which might be different than their traditional home environment.
  • There may be a wait time.
  • Fees are non-negotiable and might add up quickly depending on your pet’s needs.

Private Pet Sitters

Another option is to work with a private individual pet sitter. This service is typically operated out of a person’s home and may or may not be licensed.

Pet sitting service platforms, like Rover, help connect pet sitters with clients. They off protections and guarantees to both their customers and their service providers.

Another option is to find an individual on your own, through social media or advertisements. You might even connect in-person by using a friend or neighbor!

Private pet sitters typically care for the pet in their home. Your pet is treated as a member of their family. Often pet sitters will watch one pet at a time or only the pets from one family at a time. If they do have their own animals, or might be watching another pet, private pet sitters could offer to arrange an initial meet-up to make sure everyone gets along.

Pros:

  • Your pet(s) might be the only one at the home.
  • Your pet will be treated as a member of the family and be in a home environment.
  • Rates are often flexible, but are usually all-inclusive (treats, walks, socialization, etc.)
  • You know exactly who will be caring for your pet.

Cons:

  • Pet sitters might not have extensive training or experience in pet care. They might simply like pets!
  • Private pet sitters may or may not be officially licensed to operate this business in this location.
  •  No other services (grooming, training) will be offered.
  • The pet sitter may or may not have training for pet health emergencies.

Pet + House Sitting

Some pets do best in their own homes. Having someone come directly to your pet can be a great option for pets that need minimal care, like fish, independent pets, like cats or reptiles, or elderly animals.

When you have a pet sitter come directly to your home, they might also water your plants, take in the mail and make your home look “lived in.”

There are different options for this type of in-home service.

  • Full care: someone stays in your home the entire time you’re away.
  • Occasional care: someone drops by your home several times throughout the day to provide walks, playtime, food and water.
  • Dog walking: someone comes at pre-arranged specific times to take your dog for a walk or to a dog park; this is not a good option for multi-day trips, but might work for a long day trip.

Pros: 

  • Your pet is in a familiar setting with all their creature comforts.
  • Your home has human activity, which could be a deterrent for burglars.
  • Your pet has regular human interaction and exercise on their typical schedule.

Cons:

  • You need to provide a key to the pet sitter.
  • The sitter has access to your home and possessions.

How to Select Your Pet Sitting Option

Before you make a final decision, it is good to explore all options to find the best fit for your pet, your budget and your own personality.

As you consider your options, it’s important that you ask questions pertaining to your pet and situation.

Consider asking all pet sitters and kennels:

  • What is your experience with caring for pets? Do you have references?
  • How will my pet interact with other animals?
  • How often will my pet go for walks/be let out of his kennel?
  • What is your pet security plan? Does your yard/facility have a fence? Will you let my pet off-leash?
  • What will my pet’s day be like when she stays with you?
  • What records and health certificates does my pet need in order to work with you?

For private pet sitters, consider asking:

  • How many other pets will be in your home during my pet’s stay?
  • Where will my pet be sleeping?
  • Will you be taking my pet off your property? If so, could you please explain when and where?

For in-home sitters, you need to ask:

  • What measures are in place to protect my possessions and security?
  • Do you/your employees have current background checks that I can review?

No matter what, do your due diligence before finalizing a pet sitter or kennel. It’s important that you like and trust the folks who will be caring for your dog or cat while you are away.

Who takes care of your pet when you go on vacation?

Military Families Living On-Base Worry About the Safety of Their Drinking Water

By

Military families may need to add drinking water to their growing list of lifestyle-related worries and concerns. A recent report from the Department of Defense confirms that potentially hazardous chemicals are in the tap water at many military installations.

Military Families Living On-Base Worry About the Safety of Their Drinking Water

A total of 126 military installations have polluted water that could cause health problems. Are you worried about drinking the tap water at your on-base house?

These recent reports have left a stain on the current White House and Department of Defense because it looks like a cover-up might have happened.

Don’t Drink the Water at Your Military Base

Before military families go into full-on panic mode, it’s important that we know exactly what we’re dealing with or at least understand as much as we can with the information currently available.

What is the issue with the drinking water?

Perfluorooctane Sulfonate (PFOS) and Perfluorooctanoic Acid (PFOA) are two chemicals commonly found in everyday objects. You can find PFOS/PFOA in everything from Teflon coating to waterproofing on fabric to fast food wrappers. It was phased out of use by American manufacturers starting in May 2000.

Why are PFOS/PFOA a concern?

According to the DoD report and additional reporting by news outlets, PFOS/PFOA exposure can be harmless in small amounts. However, repeated and long-term exposure comes with a host of health complications.

Both men and women can experience impacts on fertility. Babies may be born with developmental delays. Those exposed may experience increased cholesterol levels, increased uric acid and changes in liver enzymes. There may also be changes to the immune system too.

Finally, exposure to PFOS/PFOA may have an increased risk of prostate, kidney and testicular cancers.

As of August 2017, 401 current and former military installations have had their water tested. Of those, 90 have water samples that exceeded the Environmental Protection Agency’s Lifetime Health Advisory (LHA) levels.

Additionally, 2,668 groundwater sources have been tested. Of those, 1,621 have PFOS/PFOA levels above the EPA’s LHA. All told, 1,711 sites have compromised water sources.

Reports also indicate that a total of 126 military installations have polluted water that could cause health problems.

The DoD’s response at this time, according to their published report, is to educate the services, investigate the use of products containing PFOS/PFOA and begin planning for cleanup operations.

Since the water was tested in 2017, why wasn’t the water contamination report released earlier?

The PFOS/PFOA report is enough to cause public concern. However, it now appears that the White House and DoD officials might have prevented the immediate release of information.

Through emails obtained by the Union of Concerned Scientists, officials at the Office of Management and Budget (OMB) warned the EPA of a “public relations nightmare” when the PFOS/PFOA report was released. These emails are dated January 2018.

Reports on the water contamination were released in spring 2018.

What can military families do?

If you are living on or near an impacted installation or groundwater source, it might be time to consider changing how you drink water.

Adding a water filtration system, according to a 2016 report on Water Online, can have some impact on the levels of PFOS and PFOA in your tap water supply. However, no single system has been shown to be totally effective for both categories or related chemicals. Granular activated carbon has been shown to be the most effective filtration system, along with nanofiltration and reverse osmosis.

Another option is to switch to bottled water. The Food and Drug Administration monitors bottled water manufacturers to ensures compliance with health and safety standards.

Military families should also document health concerns that might be related to PFOS/PFOA contamination. Correlating your family’s physical location with health problems that might stem from exposure to chemical contaminants is important for long-term care and solutions.

Military communities have already banded together to provide documentation of military-caused health issues due to contaminated drinking water. Current and former residents of Camp Lejeune scored a victory in this arena.

Are you stationed at a military base with unsafe drinking water? What precautions are you taking to protect your loved ones from the threat of unsafe water?

How Is My Husband Always Gone For Mother’s Day And Home For Father’s Day?

By

Ahhhhh, Mother’s Day. That glorious Sunday in May when mothers everywhere lounge luxuriously in bed.

We’re all peacefully waiting for our badly buttered toast to arrive, paired with an alcohol heavy mimosa. And then the whole family skips to brunch with happy, shiny faces.

Everything is right on Mother’s Day, as we celebrate the years of excruciating physical labor it takes to raise up a child. Many moms mark this occasion with flowers, wine, candy, cards and a trip to the spa.

Except for me.

And I’m guessing a bunch of other military spouses too.

Instead of my sweet baby angels bringing me cold cereal, I was awakened at zero dark thirty by my child screaming. I rolled over to nudge my husband, reminding him that it’s my day to sleep in, except, oh wait, I’m riding solo today.

Just like many Mother’s Days past, and certainly in the future as well, the military has thoughtfully scheduled field exercises today.

How Is My Husband Always Gone For Mother's Day And Home For Father's Day?

This year I’m observing delayed Mother’s Day on June 17, which just happens to be Father’s Day.

Guess who won’t have any work obligations on June 17 though? My husband.

Instead, he’ll probably be at the golf course celebrating Father’s Day. All alone. While I handle the kids by myself. Again.

Why is my husband always gone for Mother’s Day, but home for Father’s Day?

It seems like a cruel joke the military likes to play on me every year.

“Hahahaha, let’s leave all the non-active duty moms at home without their spouse today. Oh, but make sure the men are all home for Father’s Day. Can’t miss playing a few holes, am I right?”

Well, this year the joke’s on you, Dad! Because I’m observing delayed Mother’s Day due to scheduling conflicts. My personal Mother’s Day just happens to be on Father’s Day. Weird, right?

It seems like you might have had an OK time at your “exercise” in Seoul. I heard the all-you-can-eat Korean barbecue was delicious. The K-Pop karaoke looked fun too. I’m sure having a hotel room all to yourself with no one needing you to wipe their nose was pure torture.

Bonus: you got paid to be there!

Since you got your special day early, I’m going to go ahead and take mine right now.

When Dad’s Gone in May, Mom Plays in June

You’ll get to celebrate the joys of fatherhood the same way I basked in the glow of motherhood while you were gone. In short: alone.

That’s right, the kids are all yours today. Because you should spend Father’s Day celebrating with the precious little tykes who call you Dad.

Let’s start the day early. I’ll head out for a long sunrise run so that you can be the first face the kids see in the morning. Such a wonderful gift!

Next, you can enjoy a chilled coffee over soggy cereal. The handwritten cards will tug at your heartstrings.

Then, head out to the beach, pool or playground. Really, go wherever your heart desires. If you can get them to handle sitting in the cart, take them to the golf course. If not, mini golf is basically the same thing.

I won’t even be mad when you bring them back loaded up with sugar and sticky with melted ice cream. They have summer camp tomorrow!

While you’re out celebrating, I’ll make sure to prep the grill and food for you to cook when you return. I want you to have the honor of getting those steaks just right.

As for the middle part of the day, I was planning on having a working me-day. I’ll field some emails, check Facebook and then head off to be tortured at the spa. I’m talking brunch, massage, pedicure and facial. All while sipping champagne. It’s going to be terrible.

You can swing by to get me on your way back from mini golf.

How does your family handle missed holidays or special days? Share your tips in the comments!

Become a Trooper

By

Are you a motivated military spouse looking for a stable job with a competitive salary? Are you a hard-working veteran who is planning to separate from military service this year and would like to live in Florida? Are you retiring from the military soon and searching for your second career?

Become a Florida Highway Patrol Trooper

The Florida Highway Patrol (FHP) is currently hiring for state troopers and dispatchers. Since it is a para-military agency the FHP gives hiring preference to military veterans and their spouses. This state agency said it has an established career progression program. “We recognize and reward educational achievements and career advancements,” the agency said.

The annual starting salary for state troopers is $38,034.24.

The Florida Highway Patrol troopers actively enforce the state’s criminal, traffic, motor vehicle and driver’s license laws. The men and women serve the millions of residents and visitors of Florida using state-of-the-art training, equipment, technology and resources. The ideal job applicants are motivated individuals, hard-working employees and team players looking for a positive work environment.

Troopers with 2 years of experience (note that your active-duty military service is considered experience to be a state trooper) are eligible for specialty positions such as:

  • contraband interdiction officer
  • criminal investigations
  • dignitary protection
  • DUI patrol
  • motorcycle patrol
  • occupant protection specialist
  • recruitment officer
  • pilot
  • public affairs officer
  • special response team
  • K-9 handler

Troopers with 5 years of experience are eligible to promote to supervisory positions. The agency said that “these promotional opportunities give troopers a chance to transfer to a different location in the state if they choose to and the agency will pay for the move.”

FHP troopers receive paid vacations, holidays, sick leave, military leave, extensive health and life insurance options, deferred compensation plan and a non-contributory retirement plan. Once hired, the agency will also pay up to 6 semester hours a year for a master’s degree.

What are the requirements to be a state trooper?

You must be a U.S. citizen who is 19 years or older. Applicants must possess a valid driver’s license and have a high school diploma or general equivalency diploma. Like the military, there are physical requirements for the job. An applicant’s weight must be in proportion to his or her height.

Do I need to live in Florida to become a state trooper?

No. You are not required to live in Florida when applying for a position with the Florida Highway Patrol. You are also not required to be a Florida resident. But applicants must be willing to serve anywhere in the state of Florida.

I’m planning to get out of the military, but I don’t have my DD214 yet? Do I need to wait for my DD214 before applying for a job with the FHP?

You can still apply for a position with the Florida Highway Patrol. If you are planning to separate from military service, but haven’t received your DD214 yet, ask your Company Commander to write a letter on official letterhead detailing your separation date, type of discharge expected and your character of service.

 

What are the requirements to be a dispatcher?

A Florida Highway Patrol dispatcher needs to have the ability to

  • read maps
  • speak clearly with good verbal communication skills
  • multi-task
  • work well in stressful situations
  • maintain the confidentiality of information
  • record relevant information correctly and completely

Applicants are given on the job training. This position is rotating days off and has permanent shifts. Applicants should be available to work on holidays and weekends.

The benefits are state health and life insurance, paid vacation time, free tuition to state universities and colleges and career advancement opportunities.

Are you interested in learning more about employment opportunities at the Florida Highway Patrol? Visit Be a Trooper for more information.

I Crossed the Unwritten Officer and Enlisted Friendship Line

By

I joined the military spouse ranks at the end of an era. Which specific era, you might wonder? Well, the end of the blatant separation of spouses into “officer” and “enlisted.”

When my husband was wrapping up his stint at initial training, all of us wives (and it was only wives) were herded into an auditorium and given the rundown on life as a USMC spouse. We learned the ropes from a seasoned spouse and were handed a copy of Parade Rest.

We were lectured about protocol and decorum. I, the dependent spouse, was a direct reflection on my husband and his career. My behavior needed to be impeccable at all times. The correct place settings and seating arrangements for every possible formal and informal dinner party was reviewed in my new book.

Oh, and the rules against officer and enlisted fraternization were reviewed. But I didn’t really pay close attention to that part of the seminar. I guess it covered spouses, too. I mean, it must have, based on how other newly minted military spouses were acting.

I crossed the unwritten officer and enlisted friendship line.

And I don’t care. Because that line isn’t a real thing. It’s something that someone way back in the “good old days” created.

Some of the friends that I do life best with happen to be on the “other side” of that line.

The whole rank thing came up once at the beginning of each friendship. And then it was done.

No one blinked.

No one flinched.

Our spouses’ ranks aren’t even discussed, except for a hearty congratulations when someone gets promoted.

I Crossed the Unwritten Officer and Enlisted Friendship Line

We’re all just spouses. By “just” I really mean without the officer or enlisted caveat attached.

I have just a few criteria for my friends. First, be kind to my kids, but don’t be afraid to make them toe the line.

Also, it would be nice to enjoy a few similar hobbies. I’m into true crime, running, reading, writing and being salty about military life.

Finally, I like to have adventures and try new things.

Can you hang with that? Great! You’re in.

This attitude is becoming more and more the norm of military life and friendship among spouses.

The atmosphere has changed slowly over the last decade or so. I’m so glad that it has too. It makes everything much nicer and friendlier. Having an “all-hands” spouses club unites all of us for the good and, honestly, the food.

It wasn’t always like this, even in the very recent past.

I remember overhearing troubling conversations as a young(er) spouse. Harsh, untrue stereotypes were repeated. Some folks thought they could “just tell” what rank someone’s spouse wore based on their accent, clothing, number of children or perceived education level.

When I volunteered in the family readiness group at our first duty station, a few spouses liked to throw down rank very obviously. As if it made a difference to who got the last word.

Related: 10 Situations that Hurt a MilSpouse Friendship

One of my friends from that experience happened to be married to an enlisted Marine. After all the nonsense at my military spouse indoctrination, I was nervous about venturing into this friendship. I didn’t want to create a situation. I hesitated to connect on Facebook. I paused before socializing outside of unit events.

Then my husband set me straight.

We’re all just spouses.

By “just” I really mean without the officer or enlisted caveat attached. At the end of the day, we married the person our hearts connected to the most.

It wasn’t because of what was on their collars, but because of who they are as a human.

Although, if we’re being honest, how they look in dress uniform might have played a role in the process.

Breaking through that invisible O/E friendship barrier was the best thing I’ve done as a spouse. When I decided to stop listening to the stereotypes and the unwritten rules, I gained a whole lot of love, light and laughter.

I’ve got a whole army of amazing friends that I know I can call on, day or night, for anything. Whatever our spouses do, we’ve got each other. And to be honest, none of us are really 100% sure what our active duty other half does some days.

We’re all in this together, all of us military spouses. We are all just trying to get through this wild ride, with our sanity mostly intact. So cross that “line” if you spot a kindred spirit. It will be so worth it.

We want to hear from you! Tell us what “rules” you’ve proudly broken as a military spouse!

Navy Extends Deadline for Female Sailors to Join the Submarine Service

By

The Department of the Navy announced eight years ago that women would be allowed to serve on Navy submarines. This was a historic moment for female sailors.

Navy Extends Deadline for Female Sailors to Join the Submarine Service

If you are a female sailor interested in transitioning into the Silent Service, submarine life, talk to your detailer today.

There are now almost 80 female officers and 50 enlisted women assigned to the submarine service. Military personnel anticipate the number of female sailors on subs to reach into the hundreds in the next few years and they are actively searching for candidates to fill these positions.

In doing so, the Navy has extended the deadline for enlisted female sailors to apply to the submarine force. The previous deadline was April 2018. Female sailors in the ranks E-1 through E-8 now have until June 1, 2018, to submit their application.

Female Sailors Get an Additional Two Months to Apply for the Submarine Service

The USS Michigan was the first Navy submarine to have enlisted female sailors added to its roster. The USS Florida followed it with 30 female sailors in its ranks. By 2020, the Navy expects to add 550 female sailors to seven Ohio-class subs. That would make up about 20% of the crews.

To accommodate female sailors on these two subs, simple modifications were made to berthing and bathrooms.

Now new submarines are designed specifically with female sailors in mind. It isn’t just adding separate living and bathing areas either.

The USS New Jersey will be the first submarine built with features tailored to female sailors. This includes making valves easier to turn as well as lowering them to accommodate the height of female sailors.

Steps will also be built in front of triple high bunk beds and washing machines will be stacked. Emergency air masks will also be placed on the side instead of the ceiling to make them easier to reach.

The USS New Jersey, the first Columbia-class ballistic-missile sub with these modifications, is expected to be delivered in 2021.

In an effort to fill the positions upon these subs, the Navy is actively recruiting females from outside the Navy as well. The overall manpower of the military is on the decline. There was recently a hearing in the House Armed Services military personnel subcommittee where the personnel chiefs were challenged to recruit more service members. The focus on primarily recruiting males has shifted to searching for female candidates.

As of February of this year, about 16% of the 1.3 million service members that make up the total military force are female.

People do not feel compelled to join the military like they once did. It is estimated that only 29% of males and females between the ages of 18 and 23 would meet the qualifications to join the military.

Recruitment is tough with many young men and women choosing to go to college, trade school or straight into the workforce after high school. There just aren’t many people that want to join the military these days.

Aggressive recruitment strategies are now in place to fight for recruits.

Recruiters are now being sent to talk to female athletic teams.

Previously, recruiters would mostly just go to male athletic departments. The military believes that individuals that are a part of athletic programs are more likely to want to join the military and be qualified to do so.

With more ratings, such as submarine service, now opened to females, military personnel feel strongly that they will be better able to attract these younger individuals. Only time will tell if this new marketing approach works.

If you are interested in joining the military talk to your local military recruiter.

If you are a female sailor interested in transitioning into the Silent Service, submarine life, talk to your detailer or find out more information here.

Are you a female sailor? Tell us your story by submitting a guest post today.

Serving in the Army Is My Family’s Calling

By

by Eric Gardner, Guest Contributor

The term family business has a menagerie of feelings and definitions depending upon who you ask. I prefer the term “calling” instead of “business,” since it casts a truer light upon my unique family past.

In the broad categories which define roles associated in our military culture I’ve held many of them.

Service member.

Military spouse.

Army brat.

I’ve worn these roles with pride. With more than 40 years of life vested in this unique and sometimes challenging community, I can say unequivocally I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.

Service is a very dear ideal in my family. While I can trace my roots back to the American Revolution, I have had a constant family member in active service through WWI, WWII, Japan’s Occupation, the Cold War, and the Global War on Terror. My wife is also a third generation military member.

This family calling has given us a shared outlook and understanding on what is truly important in life.

Serving in the Army Is My Family's Calling

Did you follow your father and join the Army?

Even with such a rich family history of military service my parents never forced a career in the Army upon me. Growing up in the ’80s I was a huge fan of the “G.I. Joe” cartoon and shows like “The A-Team” and “MacGyver.” While other children my age saw these larger than life personas as too fantastic to be true, I knew the exact opposite.

As a child I could say that I’d met the proverbial steely eyes, barrel chested freedom fighter on several occasions. In “G.I. Joe,” Duke, Lady Jay and Roadblock would display the moral courage to take a stand against something they felt was wrong. I could see the same exhibition of character by walking into my father’s office on any given day and witness the towering soldiers doing the exact same thing.

This introduction into my family calling was accented more when units would hold their organizational days. These family-oriented events always showcased the tools of the trade to loved ones so they could get a better understanding of what their service member did.

Imagine seeing every Hollywood prop in real life and understanding that the soldier standing in front of you was just as awesome as any character that was on the big screen; it clearly made a lasting impression.

Before my elementary school years were over I understood how camouflage worked, possessed a loose understanding of how many different weapon systems our service men and women were tasked to employ and a firm respect for the work that each of them did.

Serving in the Army Is My Family's Calling

I never viewed my unique exposure to the Army as manipulation to join its ranks. Instead this insider information allowed me to make the best decision I could about my future.

I have wonderful memories of wearing face paint, dressed in my pint-sized fatigues and patrolling our military quarters with my sister in tow on a mission to find a lost G.I. Joe somewhere in the hedge. A smile always comes to mind when I think back to having my father introduce me to the challenges of obstacle courses and learned how stations like the gut buster and the weaver vexed the men and women under his command. Whether it was climbing on Humvees and tanks or checking out the static displays of the utility and attack helicopters, I saw the world of the military as a constant adventure.

On the flip side there were times when the military lifestyle was negative. The moves, training and deployments, and constantly reinventing yourself are challenges we can all relate to. However, with each of these, one thing made it all possible; family. My mother and father always put us first — within reason of course.

Even in the tough times we understood that friends and homes may change but our family would always be there.

When I went off to college my future world was a blank canvas to explore. Even with an endless array of life options, the most fulfilling was in my R.O.T.C. program which lead to my commissioning in the Army as an infantry officer. The same branch my great grandfather was in during WWI and my father was during his 30-year career. I never viewed the unique exposure to the Army as some sort of manipulation to join. Instead it allowed me to make the best decision I could about my future.

Serving in the Army Is My Family's Calling

My parents never forced a career in the Army upon me.

My tour of duty as a service member with the Army lasted eight and a half years. As I transitioned to the role of spouse my love for the military way of life didn’t change. With my own children now seeing the nonstop adventure this lifestyle holds they can make their own decisions when they enter the workforce to see if the military is right for them.

Regardless of their choice they will know that within their family were men and women who were willing to risk everything to ensure they would be afforded the same chance at a wonderful future they had been given.

Serving in the Army Is My Family's Calling

I can trace my roots back to the American Revolution, I have had a constant family member in active service through WWI, WWII, Japan’s Occupation, the Cold War, and the Global War on Terror. My wife is also a third generation military member.

Did you follow your parent and join the Army or other branch of service? Tell us your family of military service story in the comments section.

Eric Gardner was raised in a military family and lived around the world. Following in his father's footsteps, he joined the U.S. Army as an Infantry Officer. Eric Gardner was raised in a military family and lived around the world. Following in his father’s footsteps, he joined the U.S. Army as an Infantry Officer. Since the end of his wartime service he has shifted gears and is now a stay-at-home father. In his role as an active duty Army spouse, he has become an author. As the creator of the XIII Legion Series he has enjoyed great success, and enjoys meeting other entrepreneurial spouses as well as fellow authors. You can see more from Eric Gardner at his Facebook page: www.facebook.com/thirteenthlegion.series, and http://www.facebook.com/XIIILGN or follow him via Twitter @13thLegion.