Article MilitaryShoppers Page 67

Military Life & Depression: Part 2

04/23/2014 By Jessica Aycock

As a military spouse, you are familiar with the ups and downs that come with the military lifestyle. For some of you, the downs can dominate and seriously interfere with your life. Nearly 10% of the population suffers from depression– and 70% of them are women.

The stress of military life affects everyone differently.

While you may think that depression goes hand in hand with deployments, that’s not necessarily true. It’s something that is a constant mental health battle and each individual person is different. One military spouse may feel depressed only when major situations happen– an illness or death in the family, a baby’s birth, financial troubles, deployment, etc. Another may struggle to get out of bed in the morning and any disruption to a routine could make them feel inadequate or overwhelmed.

My depression diagnosis came after I realized I was sleeping nearly 15 hours a day and felt completely overwhelmed with my stressful job. I used medication in the beginning until I found natural ways to deal with depression for the long term.

Here are 4 ways I’ve naturally battled depression for the last 8 years.

(Remember: there’s no perfect way to deal with depression.)

Talking.

I spent a lot of time talking with a counselor or therapist about what was going in my head and how I was dealing with it. Friends can be a good option too, but for me, they were too close and lacked objectivity to tell me when I was blowing things out of proportion.

Exercise.

Any form of exercise will be beneficial to your mental health– try yoga or tai chi, volleyball, soccer, running, or swimming. Running became my form of therapy. Later I moved on to CrossFit, a high-intensity fitness regiment and I can honestly tell when I have been slacking on fitness. I don’t see it on the scale. I feel it in my brain. You may not want to do it, but I promise you will feel better when you incorporate exercise into your daily routine.

Yoga is a great way to battle depression naturally.

Evaluate your diet.

Sugar and processed foods can impact your mood. I crave sugar when I’m depressed and unfortunately, eating sugar makes me more depressed. Pay attention to what you eat and how you feel afterward. Make adjustments as necessary.

Befriend positive people.

Make the conscious choice to socialize with people who make you happy and are happy in general. Do what you can to foster happy thoughts. Laugh often. Don’t listen to sad music or watch depressing movies. Keep a gratitude journal.

Depression affects more than the military spouse with the diagnosis. It takes its toll on everyone close to them.

Military spouses, repeat after me: It’s okay to ask for help; it’s okay to offer help.

What’s your favorite way to naturally combat feelings of sadness?

Note: Please reach out to a professional if you feel sad, depressed, unhappy, or constantly worried. While common, depression is a serious condition and should be properly diagnosed. If you are currently taking medications, please consult your doctor before trying any additional remedies. Do not reduce or quit taking medication without your doctors’ oversight.

7 Ways to Simplify Bill Paying

04/22/2014 By Amiyrah Martin

Paying bills is something that we never thought about as children when we wished to grow up. It goes along the line of dealing with taxes and cooking your own meals. The great part is that even though bills are a necessity for adult life, there are many ways that we can make this chore easier on ourselves.

Here are 7 ways to simplify bill paying within your home.

1. Make a Date with Your Bills

Whether you get paid weekly, biweekly or monthly, you need to have a set day and time that you will dedicate to paying your bills. Just like your significant other, bills deserve your undivided attention, but unlike your significant other, that time can be as little as 15 minutes. During this time, make sure you are in a quiet place where you can concentrate and won’t miss a bill payment.

Tip: Spend minimum time with maximum concentration on paying bills.

2. Automate It

In the world of technology, finances can easily be managed through an app, computer program, or simply through a note or two saved on your smartphone. Websites like mint.com are perfect for those of us that need to see our finances all in one place. These financial organizational tools make it easier to see which bills can be automated and the program reminds you when bills are due.

Lower bills, like debt payments around $100, can and should be automated. If a bill has been constant throughout the year, set up automated payments through your bank or credit union. For larger bills or bills that may have hidden fees or fluctuations (like cell phone and cable bills), I suggest getting your own eyes on that bill every month.

Tip: Set up automatic bill payment for bills that are less than $100.

3. Pay Everything Once

Yes, you can pay every bill at the same time, even if you are on a budget. While you have the option of automating small bills, you can also choose to pay them off once a year. Utility bills, membership fees, and insurance bills can all be paid on a yearly basis.

If you choose to go this route, make your payment when you get a bonus or extra money, like your tax refund. Be sure to ask if there are discounts for paying a bill up-front. Insurance companies often offer money back if you pay in advance, so take advantage.

Tip: Pay insurance and utility bills annually to save money.

4. Change Your Due Date

It is more difficult to stay on track with bill paying when your bills are due on different days during the month. The easiest way to remedy this is to call the companies and ask for your due dates to be changed. Try to switch them to days when you know you will have enough funds to pay the bills.

Tip: Pick 2 days each month and schedule your bills to be paid on those days.

5. Pay Yourself First

This is the most important bill that you pay each month. Why is this essential for the payment of all of your other bills? It gives you motivation to not only make more money, but to pay down bills and debt in order to pay yourself more. This bill should be paid first and put directly into a savings account, whether it’s for fun money or your emergency fund.

Tip: Designate money to be deposited into your savings account monthly.

What bill-paying system works for you?

6. Mark Your Bills as Paid

Just like paying yourself first works as a motivation, marking your bills as paid can cause you to keep your bill paying less stressful and as simple as possible. By marking these paid, whether it’s writing it in red marker on a paper bill or typing “paid” next to the bill on a computer program, you’ll ensure that you don’t pay a bill twice and that you are making progress in your efforts.

Tip: Use a red marker to write “PAID” on each bill.

7. Tailor Your Bill-Paying System

You can take all of the advice listed above, but you still have to tailored it to your own personality. Do you love lists? Are you into calendars? Do you do better when EVERYTHING is computer-based? Pick what you gravitate to and stick to it.

For our family, we are online and paper calendar people. We use Google calendar with alerts so that my husband and I both know when a bill is due. But we also use a paper calendar during our bill-paying “dates.” For us, it helps to see the date the bill is due and the paper bill, as well as on a computer screen.

Tip: Find a bill-paying system that works for you.

Which tip will you use to simplify your bill paying this month?

5 Lessons from a Special Needs Mom

04/22/2014 By Julie Provost

Pick your battles with a special needs child.

Raising special needs children should have its own parenting lesson book. As a parent, you will have moments when you feel overwhelmed, unprepared, and frustrated with your special needs child. I know I have. All special needs parents have felt that way. It’s normal.

But these feelings shouldn’t become your “normal.”

Here are 5 lessons I learned about raising special needs children:

Pick your battles. This is a biggie. Although you want to be firm with your kids, sometimes you need to pick your battles. If your kid is in a certain mood, everything is going to cause a problem so pick what is important and don’t worry about the rest. If your son only wants to wear his Batman jacket and getting on the bus is a big issue anyway, let it go. It really isn’t a big deal. Focus on the task of getting on the bus. Don’t worry about the jacket.
Take time for yourself. You need it. When you feel like it is getting to where YOU need a time-out, take one. If you are the only adult in the house it might be hard to do this. You might need to say to yourself, “You know, taking a time-out is more important than THIS battle.” If there is another adult in the house, have them take over for a while. Go take a bath, read a book, or meet a friend for coffee.
Look at the big picture. Instead of thinking about the bad days, reflect on the last few weeks or months and see how far your child has come. If it helps, ask a friend to remind you. They don’t see your children daily and can notice a difference. I know with my oldest I believed he would never learn to speak. Then a friend who only saw him every few months told me how much better he was doing. It was hard for me to see this change since I was always with him. It helped to hear that others saw the progress even if I didn’t see it myself.
Lean on a support group. This is so important. Find people who support you and your children. Find other families that are experiencing similar issues. Knowing you are not alone and have support goes a long way.
Don’t doubt yourself.
Don’t compare. When it comes to special needs parenting, you have a lot of choices. Go with your gut. What works for one child with autism might not work for another. Talk to your doctors, therapists, teachers, and your spouse to figure out what is best for YOUR child. If you feel your kid has a certain issue and people tell you not to worry, but you can’t let it go, get it checked out anyway. I really think moms know if something is going on with their children. Don’t doubt yourself.

Are you raising a special needs child? What lessons would you add to this list?

4 Ways to Reduce the Stress of Finances

04/21/2014 By Amiyrah Martin

For those of us looking to be more financially responsible, stress seems to be a big factor of how we handle our new spend-less, save-more lifestyle. Bills, debt, after-school activities for our kids, and even birthday presents can cause our hearts to race when we think about the amount of money each of them takes from our household. With a budget that’s based on the military pay scale, that stress can easily amplify.

Here are four great tips on how to handle the stress of finances.

Stop Thinking about Money

Yes, this may seem counter-intuitive, but thinking about your finances all the time can not only cause stress within yourself, but stress within your home. It’s fine to think about bills that may be due that month or groceries that have to be purchased, but never think of them in dollars. We have a mindset that cringes at the thought of losing money even to important things like food, so if we imagine “funds” being used instead of dollars, our demeanor changes.

Set a Financial Timer

Do you find yourself constantly checking your account balances a few times a week or even a few times a day? Set a timer where you allot 10 minutes to check your finances a day. 10 minutes. No more and no less. This tells your brain that you’ll have a set part of the day when you can review your checking account, stocks, mutual funds, or any other finances. After doing this for a few months, our family is now down to checking our account only once a week for 10 minutes. Conditioning your mind to put any financial stress on the back burner until your scheduled financial time will allow you to rest your brain and calm your nerves about paying bills.

Set Long-Term Goals

Living paycheck to paycheck causes us to forget the end result of why we are paying off debt or staying on top of bills. Make solid long-term goals for you and your family. Maybe it’s a vacation to Australia or owning your own home, but keep those goals in mind each week. If you are attracted to visual encouragement, place a picture of your goal as a screensaver on your computer or your cell phone. Have the family create a vision board and place it in a prominent area of your home. Assign something positive to finances and you’re more inclined to stress less about it all.

Celebrate the Positive

While you’re making long-term goals for your finances, keep in mind the positive outcomes that are currently in your life. Have you paid down a debt? Celebrate. Are you on track to having multiple thousands of dollars in savings? Rejoice. Whether it’s getting a 20% decrease in your cable bill or you found a new way to automate payments that causes less stress, you have to celebrate those small victories within your finances. If we wait to acknowledge an accomplishment when it’s something big, we may never feel like we are getting anywhere within our finances. Pat yourself on the back weekly, daily, or even hourly. You deserve it.

Want more tips on how to stick to your budget? Sign up for our newsletter.

How to Plant a Victorious Deployment Garden

04/18/2014 By Julie Provost

Did you plant your deployment garden? It is already the middle of April and time to start planting those easy-to-grow vegetables, such as tomatoes, peppers, carrots, peas, and herbs. I have found peas to be one of the easiest vegetables to grow in my past deployment gardens.

Plant this month to eat tomatoes off the vine this summer.

The first step to planting a garden is research. You need to know what zone you live in. Different parts of the country should start their seeds at different times during the spring. You want to make sure you are doing what is best for where you live. Then you are more likely have success and enjoy the bounty of your work this summer.

Don’t know when’s the best time to plant? Consult the USDA’s Hardiness Zone Map.

I live in Tennessee, which is located in zone 6B. I already planted my sugar snap peas, carrots, and radishes. With the carrots I am planting a few every week. That way they will not all be ready for harvest at the same time. We can munch on a steady stream of home-grown carrots throughout summer.

Some plants are able to be put in the ground before your last frost date while others need to wait. Each vegetable is different and can handle different types of weather.

I am anxiously waiting to plant my corn until nighttime temperatures are consistently above 55 degrees. Unfortunately our temperatures are expected to hover around 30 degrees this week. Although by the calendar I can plant around the 15th of this month, I decided to wait until it warms up a little more.

I am also growing tomatoes and peppers which I started from seed back in February. These will not go into the garden until the first week in May. Right now I have eight tomato plants and two pepper plants in a small greenhouse.

A lot of the success of your garden will hinge on when you start your seeds or put your transplants in the ground. You want to make sure you know when is the right time to plant your vegetable seeds. Different types of seeds also require different planting depths. (Use your ruler to avoid planting too deeply or too shallow.)

If you are unsure about planting depth or plant spacing, read the vegetable’s seed packet. It gives you all the information you need.

What’s your favorite vegetable to grow at home?

You also want to use your best judgement when deciding what day to plant your seeds. If there is a windstorm predicted the day you were going to plant your garden, hold off until it passes. If you are having colder weather longer than you normally do, wait an extra few days.

Your plants will thank you.

What vegetables are you planting this spring?

Military Life & Depression: Part 1

04/17/2014 By Jessica Aycock

Military life is different than civilian life. Military life comes with its own stressors and challenges.

Here is a not-so-fun fact: Service members and their spouses are at a higher risk for depression than the general public.

Being a new spouse to military life can be a shock to your system: Where do you fit in? How do you make friends when you move every few years? What do you do when you’re so far away from your family and/or friends? And let’s not even talk about the whole new language to learn (PCS. OPSEC. MOS. TDY. Say what?) It’s like living in a foreign country.

Throw a deployment into the mix and you may find yourself with increased responsibility– for the finances, children (if you have any) AND worrying about your spouse’s safety.

Too often, new spouses don’t realize that the stress of this lifestyle– while normal– may be indicators of something more. Namely, depression.

Before my depression diagnosis eight years ago, I thought I was going through a rough time. I blamed my job and figured once I left, things would get better. Only the problem was deeper and it took a little extra help from a doctor to get back on my feet.

Know the Signs of Depression

The signs of depression vary for each person. How do you know if you’re depressed? You may be experiencing one or more of the following:

change in sleeping pattern (either can’t sleep or sleeping too much)
not finding joy in things you once loved
no longer interested in hobbies
overeating or loss of appetite
trouble concentrating or remembering details
feelings of despair, guilt, or hopelessness
headaches
irritability, restlessness
thoughts of suicide, suicide attempts

Keep in mind that you may not have ALL of these symptoms– everyone is different. Personally, I slept close to 15 hours a day, had zero interest in anything outside of my home, felt completely hopeless, and suffered from migraines.

If you have any of these symptoms, please make an appointment with a mental health professional or your primary care doctor. You may also reach out to your Family Readiness Officer and a friend who is willing to listen.

Tell a friend if you are feeling depressed.

You shouldn’t be ashamed to admit that you’re feeling down, sad, or depressed. A large majority of people suffer from depression at some point in their lives. Some are able to pull themselves out of it and some of us need a little extra help.

Who do you talk to when you’re feeling down?

Commissary Specials Answer the Question: What’s for Dinner?

04/16/2014 By Julie Provost

At least once a week, the majority of military spouses are shopping for groceries at our military commissary. We are the ones who do most of the cooking. We are the ones facing the daily question: What’s for dinner?

The answer is found in the weekly commissary specials.

It’s hard to figure out what to make for dinner every night. Meal planning is best and can save money when you plan meals based on what’s on sale.

Slow cooker meals can be very easy and convenient to make, especially with our busy lives. The hardest part is to remember to turn it on at the right time. Start it too early and dinner will be done in the middle of the afternoon. Start it too late and you will be ordering pizza for dinner. I admit I have done that a time or two.

For a savory slow cooker dinner, I like to take a chicken breast, add water or chicken broth and some spices. I might do something simple like salt or pepper. You can also add in some convenient slow cooker sauces for flavor. There is a lot you can do to create different meals.

Save time and money by making dinner in your slow cooker.

I also like making deli sandwiches at home. They taste great and you can customize them the way that you want. Plus they are a lot cheaper than buying them from a store or eating out. Studies show that families on average spend less than $2 a day packing a sandwich for lunch. It is a good idea to have two types of deli meat in your refrigerator. Add cheese, veggies, and your favorite sauce or dressing and you are good to go.

Sandwiches are a healthy and affordable lunch.

Making your own desserts is a lot cheaper than buying them baked and packaged at the grocery store. You just need a little time to prepare. Cake and brownie mixes (where you only need to add oil, water, eggs, or butter) are basically foolproof.

I like to stock my pantry with cake and brownie mixes and have them on hand. Then I am ready to bring a yummy dessert to an FRG meeting, Bunco social, or a neighborhood barbecue on a moment’s notice.

The items I mentioned in this post are on sale at your military commissary this month. Did I spark some ideas for meal plans? I hope so. Happy cooking!

Want to know the weekly Manager’s Specials? Sign up for the newsletter!

7 Ways You Sabotage Your Morning – And 1 Way To Stop

04/14/2014 By Military Shoppers

I think we all know about the benefits of breakfast – but sometimes the benefit of those extra 15 minutes of sleep are so easy to put higher on the morning priority list. So, for this list post, I decided to write about the bad things that happen when I don’t have breakfast, instead of the good things that can happen to you if you do have breakfast. Maybe that will have more of an impact…

When I don’t eat breakfast…

1…I get a massive headache and it is always a surprise…always.

2….The small things bother me…like dog kibble on the ground or long lines at the grocery store.

3…Small tasks seem insurmountable. The pile of dishes, the mountain of laundry, the pages of e-mails, and long list of voicemails I have to sift through.

4…The kids are louder – exponential decibels louder.

5…I don’t have enough energy to work out.

6…I eat more at dinner.

7…I can’t make up my workout because I ate too much at dinner.

Stop Chasing the Ideal Breakfast

Not having breakfast in the morning messes with my entire day, and yet it is still really hard for me to learn my lesson. I want so desperately to have that picturesque breakfast in the morning where the family is gathered around the table with steamy eggs, bacon, maybe a muffin or two.

But that breakfast is not realistic for most of us crazy busy Americans…and honestly, bacon and muffins aren’t that great for us either.

What IS manageable is cereal. Cereal with some extra nutritional boosts:

Start Your Day With A Smile

Honey Nut Cheerios or Cinnamon Toast Crunch with a spoonful of milled flaxseed and milk. I’m a little addicted to my Cheerios (I’m eating a bowl now…it #mustbethehoney). I like adding milled flaxseed to food wherever I can since it adds extra fiber, iron, and omega-3 acids…and it’s easy.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=drC2fA86Nc4

You can get the big boxes of Honey Nut Cheerios and Cinnamon Toast Crunch at the commissary for cheap. Plus cereal doubles as breakfast and late-night snack.

Want to know what else you can do with Honey Nut Cheerios? Check out the cheerios recipes page and get inspired.

8 Ways to Simplify Your Bedrooms

04/11/2014 By Julie Provost

If you are like me, you are always looking for ways to simplify your life and your home. Moving every few years as we Military spouses do makes it a little easier to sort though our stuff and get a little bit more organized. However, we still might need some good ideas on how to simplify spaces in our homes. I know bedrooms can be a challenging area to keep clean and organized. Here are some ideas on how to simplify your bedrooms.

1. Bins, bins, bins.

For children’s rooms, use bins to hold toys. Go through the toys and categorize them. If your children are old enough they can help you with this project.

2. Plan to purge.

Make plans to sort through toys once every few weeks. Get rid of the broken ones as well as the ones your kids no longer play with. Make sure you to do this right before birthdays and Christmas when you know your kids will get new ones anyway.

3. Does that go there?

Don’t use your room as a storage area. This can be tempting. You tell yourself it doesn’t matter because no one but you and your spouse go into the room. But the reality is you want to create a clear space in there. You want it to feel nice and simple so you can easily relax. Clutter won’t help you do that.

4. Habits make clutter die hard.

Get in the habit of making the bed right away. I have a routine where I make the bed as soon as I get dressed. A bed that is made makes the room feel so much better than a bed that isn’t.

5. Use end tables.

Find some coordinating end tables to put on each side of the bed. Not only do these look nice but they can hold things you might need. You can put your alarm, books, light and cell phone on the table so it is close to you while you sleep.

6. Get into a regular sheet changing routine.

Sheets are like shirts that you wear everyday. Pick a day where you will go through the house and replace and wash everyone’s sheets. Wash them as soon as possible to help simplify the process. Don’t forget to change the pillow cases as well.

7. Closets need love too.

Keep your closets organized. You will feel much better about your bedroom is your closet is organized and you can find what you need. Take an afternoon to go through it and get rid of anything you don’t use or wear.

8. Be nice to your future self.

Every night before bed, walk through your rooms and make sure everything is picked up off the floor, clothes are in the hamper and everything looks great for the next day. You will thank yourself in the morning.

Photo Credit

I hope that these 8 tips have helped you create a more simple place in your home. We all deserve to have a stress free zone in our homes where we can truly relax. Do you have any tips to share?

5 Ways To Prepare For Commissary Closures

04/03/2014 By Amiyrah Martin

It’s been all over the news for months. Commissary closures have been the big discussion throughout the country, and military families have been feeling the stress and suffering already. With an average of 30% savings at the commissary, how can military families set themselves up to ease into this big change that may be on the horizon? Here are some tips that will help protect your family from feeling the effects of commissary closures and pay-cuts.

Create the ultra stockpile. While stockpiling can already help a family stretch their grocery budget, making a game plan to stock up on 6 months of your essential non-perishables will create a cushion to help you get used to the sales cycles of other stores. Items tend to go on deep discount every 6 to 8 weeks, so you’ll be able to see when your favorite pasta, brown rice or olive oil will be at it’s best price. Until then, take advantage of the commissary’s coupon deals, and the manufacturer coupons available in your local sunday paper to fill up the pantry.
Use alternative food sources. Now is a good time to find out if a small garden is allowed at your base housing. Planting just a few items like tomatoes, sweet peas and lettuce will help to offset your grocery budget. Also, search for CSAs in your area, or even local farms that may allow you to buy half a cow or other proteins. These memberships can be split with other military families, which will help the whole community save.
Contact your favorite brands. In the age of emails, texts and apps, we tend to forget how important a letter can be, especially when you are a loyal customer. Look for addresses for your favorite grocery brands and write them about our current situation. Most brands will send you coupons for free product, while others may mail you a small stockpile of actual product. The good news is that companies will send you coupons once every 6 months. All you have to do is ask.
Win your financial cushion. Did you know that at any given time, a blog or website will be giving away gift cards to your local grocery store, or even regular Visa or Amex gift cards? Why not win these to help stretch your budget? This is a bit unorthodox, but it has helped my family when we need a little extra funds to stock up on proteins and special dietary items. One easy way to keep up with these giveaways and contests is to create a Facebook group with a few fellow military families, and you’ll alert each other of any new contests you may come across. Make sure to follow all rules and regulations, which are usually very simple, and you’ll be surprised at how much you can win. Also, pay attention to the hashtag #giveaway and #contest on twitter for up to the minute giveaways.
Have a talk with the whole family. When times like these are given to families like ours, it’s time for a talk with all members. Explain to your kids how the closures will cause changes within your family, and ask them for their input on how you can handle it as a team. You’ll be surprised by the inventive and useful ideas they will come up with, mostly because they appreciate you including them in the game plan. Make this a monthly meeting, just in case a family member may have new ideas of how the grocery budget can be stretched even further.

« Previous Page